Navy Or Airforce???

[cav58d]

USN or USAF?


by Bob Norris

Bob Norris is a former Naval aviator who also did a 3 year exchange tour flying the F-15 Eagle. He is now an accomplished author of entertaining books about US Naval Aviation including "Check Six" and "Fly-Off". Check out his web site at http://www.bobnorris.com. In response to a letter from an aspiring fighter pilot on which military academy to attend, Bob replied with the following.



12 Feb 04
Young Man,
Congratulations on your selection to both the Naval and Air Force Academies.
Your goal of becoming a fighter pilot is impressive and a fine way to serve
your country. As you requested, I'd be happy to share some insight into
which service would be the best choice.
Each service has a distinctly different culture. You need to ask yourself
"Which one am I more likely to thrive in?"

USAF Snapshot: The USAF is exceptionally well organized and well run. Their
training programs are terrific. All pilots are groomed to meet high
standards for knowledge and professionalism. Their aircraft are top-notch
and extremely well maintained. Their facilities are excellent. Their
enlisted personnel are the brightest and the best trained. The USAF is
homogenous and macro. No matter where you go, you'll know what to expect,
what is expected of you, and you'll be given the training & tools you need
to meet those expectations. You will never be put in a situation over your
head. Over a 20-year career, you will be home for most important family
events. Your Mom would want you to be an Air Force pilot...so would your
wife. Your Dad would want your sister to marry one.

Navy Snapshot: Aviators are part of the Navy, but so are Black shoes
(surface warfare) and bubble heads (submariners). Furthermore, the Navy is
split into two distinctly different Fleets (West and East Coast). The Navy
is heterogeneous and micro. Your squadron is your home; it may be great,
average, or awful. A squadron can go from one extreme to the other before
you know it. You will spend months preparing for cruise and months on
cruise. The quality of the aircraft varies directly with the availability
of parts. Senior Navy enlisted are salt of the earth; you'll be proud if
you earn their respect. Junior enlisted vary from terrific to the troubled
kid the judge made join the service. You will be given the opportunity to
lead these people during your career; you will be humbled and get your hands
dirty. The quality of your training will vary and sometimes you will be
over your head. You will miss many important family events. There will be
long stretches of tedious duty aboard ship. You will fly in very bad weather
and/or at night and you will be scared many times. You will fly with legends
in the Navy and they will kick your bellybutton until you become a lethal force.
And some days - when the scheduling Gods have smiled upon you - your jet
will catapult into a glorious morning over a far-away sea and you will be
drop-jawed that someone would pay you to do it. The hottest girl in the bar
wants to meet the Naval Aviator. That bar is in Singapore.

Bottom line, son, if you gotta ask...pack warm & good luck in Colorado.

Banzai

PS Air Force pilots wear scarves and iron their flight suits.

[Sikboy]

Anyone have the story about the exciting life in Maritime Patrol?

I love that story.

-Sik

[Sikboy]

Sir,

My name is DJ Baker and I would appreciate it if you could tell me what It takes to be an F18 fighter pilot for the Navy. What classes should I take in high school to help the career I want to pursue later in my life? What could I do to get in the Naval Academy?

Sincerely,

DJ Baker

Dear DJ,

Obviously, through no fault of your own, your young, impressionable brain has been poisoned by the superfluous, hyped-up, "Top Gun" media portrayal of fighter pilots. Unfortunately, this portrayal could not be further from the truth. In my experience, I've found most fighter pilots pompous, back-stabbing, momma's boys with inferiority complexes, as well as being extremely overrated aeronautically.

However, rather than dash your budding dreams of becoming a USN Aviator, I offer the following alternative: What you REALLY want to aspire to is the exciting, challenging, and rewarding world of Maritime Patrol, andthis, young DJ, means one thing....the venerable workhorse, THE P-3 Orion!

I can guarantee no fighter pilot can brag that he has flown a mining run at 300 ft above the water, at 300 knots, while trying to calculate a means of justifying an emergency divert to Pattaya Beach, Thailand, avoiding shipping, and yelling at the TACCO, all while eating a box lunch, with the engineer in the back taking a piss and the navigator puking in his trash can!

I tell you, DJ, Maritime Patrol is where it's at! Where else is it legal to throw hazardous material out of the aircraft, and not even give a crap what Greenpeace and the other tree huggers think! No where else can you crawl in the back of the aircraft and take a nap because you are so hung over that focusing your eyes takes to much effort!

And talk about exotic travel? When P-3's go somewhere, they GO somewhere (usually for 6 months, unfortunately). This gives you the opportunity to immerse yourself in the local culture enough to give any natives a bad taste in their mouths for the USN and Americans in general, not something those jet jocks can do from their staterooms on a ship!

As far as recommendations for your course of study, I offer these:

Take a lot of math courses. You will need all the advanced math skills you can muster to enable you to calculate per diem rates around the world, and when trying to split up the crew's bar tab so that the copilot really believes he owes 85% of the whole thing and the NAV believing he owes the other 20%.

Health sciences are important, too. You will need a thorough knowledge of biology to make those educated guesses of how much longer you can drink beer before the tremendous case of the s**ts catches up to you from that meal you ate at that place that had the belly dancers in some Godforsaken foreign country whose name you can't even pronounce!

Social studies are also beneficial. It is important for a good Patrol
Plane Commander (PPC) to have the cultural knowledge to be able to ascertain the exact location of the nearest titty bar in any country in the world. Then be able to persuade the local authorities to release the RADAR operator, after he offends every sensibility of the local religion and culture.

A foreign language is helpful, but not required. You will never be able to pronounce the names of the NAVAIDs in Italy, and it's much easier to ignore them and go where you want to anyway. As a rule of thumb: Waiters and bellhops in France are always called "Pierre", in Spain it's "Hey, Pedro", in Puerto Rico it's "Juan", and in Italy, of course, it's "Mario." These terms of address also serve in other countries interchangeably.

A study of geography is also paramount. You will need to know the basic location of all the places you've been when you get back from your deployment and are ready to stick those little pins in that huge world map you've taped to your living room wall, right next to that gigantic wooden giraffe statue and beer stein collection.

Well, DJ, I hope this little note inspires you. And by the way, forget about that Naval Academy thing. All P-3 guy's know that there are waaay too few women and too little alcohol there to provide a well-balanced education. A nice, big state college would be a much better choice.

Sincerely,

*****

Lt Cdr USN