just another cowboy joke

[bigsky]

This woman is driving into a small town and slams on the brakes as a coyote runs across the road in front of her. Just as she regains her wits and gets ready to proceed, a cowboy runs right in front of her and catches the coyote by the hind legs and starts screwing it.
"Oh my God!" she exclaims and drives into town to find the local law. She sees the local sheriff's car parked in front of the town bar.
"It figures," she says as she storms inside.
The first thing she notices is an old, old man with a long white beard sitting in the corner jacking-off. She runs up to the sheriff who's sitting at the bar with his drink.
"What kind of sick town are you running here? I drive into town and almost run over some cowboy sodomizing an animal.... and then ...I come in here ...and see this old man in the corner jacking-off right in public!"
"Well, ma'am," the sheriff slowly replies, "you don't expect him to catch a coyote at his age, do ya?"

[StarOfAfrica2]

The Lone Ranger is captured by an Indian tribe.  The chief tells the Lone Ranger how much he admires him, and that to celebrate capturing such an important and respected warrior, they will have 3 days of partying and feasting before they kill him.  The chief allows that the Lone Ranger may have 1 wish fulfilled each day until he is killed.  

He thinks for a moment, and then asks to speak to his horse.  The chief is wary of a trick, but having the Lone Ranger's hands tied behind his back, he allows Silver to be brought into the camp.  The Lone Ranger whispers into Silver's ear, and the horse whinnys and gallops off.  The chief looks puzzled, but directs the guards to make sure they take care of their charge.  Just before sunset, Silver returns carrying the most stunning blonde woman anyone has ever seen.  He carries her to the teepee where they are holding the Lone Ranger, and she stays the night.  

The next morning, the chief congratulates the Lone Ranger on his well trained steed, and asks if he has thought on his second favor.  The Lone Ranger replies yes, he would again like to speak to his horse.  Once again, Silver is brought in, the Lone Ranger whispers in his ear, and Silver rears back, whinnying and pawing at the air, and then tears off out of camp in a cloud of dust.  Again, just before sunset, Silver returns.  This time he is carrying a brunette, the most absolutely gorgeous woman anyone had ever seen.  He carried her to the teepee and dropped her off.

The next morning, the chief came to talk to the Lone Ranger.  He expressed again his admiration for how well trained Silver was, and his admiration for how much of a man the Lone Ranger was.  "Even faced with death," he said, "you are able to put a brave face on things and make love to women more beautiful than any we have ever seen.  But we still must kill you.  Today is your final day, what is your final wish?"

The Lone Ranger looks around and squares his shoulders.  He looks back at the chief and says "Could you bring me my horse one more time?"  The chief nods and has Silver brought in.  The Lone Ranger looks at his beloved steed for a moment, and seems like he is about to tear up.  He reaches out and lovlingly pats Silver on the head.  Then he grabs the horses ear in his fist, and yanks the horse's head forcefully down to his level and stares at him eye to eye, shouting "I told you to bring me a POSSE you stupid horse, a POSSE!!"