The noodle requests a promotion and a raise for the following reasons:
1. Has to work hard.
2. Has to work at great depths.
3. Has to work upside down.
4. Has no ventilation or air conditioned work environment.
5. Has to work in a high humidity environment.
6. Has to work at high temperatures.
7. Does not get weekends and holidays off.
8. Does not get time off after extra hours of work.
9. Has a hazardous work environment that often causes illness.
Management Reply:
Request denied for the following reasons.
1. Does not work 8 hours straight during any work period.
2. Does not answer immediately to all requests.
3. Coworkers often unsatisfied by job performance.
4. After a short activity period, falls asleep.
5. Shows no evidence of fidelity at the workplace.
6. Works better alone than with others.
7. Does not work at all unless pushed from behind.
8. Does not leave the workplace clean after finishing work.
9. Sometimes leaves work too early.
