Author Topic: Politics explained  (Read 308 times)

Offline mosgood

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Politics explained
« on: August 22, 2005, 12:26:19 PM »
FEUDALISM: You have two cows. Your lord takes some of the milk.

PURE SOCIALISM: You have two cows. The government takes them and puts them in a barn with everyone else's cows. You have to take care of all of the cows. The government gives you as much milk as you need.

BUREAUCRATIC SOCIALISM: You have two cows. The government takes them and put them in a barn with everyone else's cows. They are cared for by ex-chicken farmers. You have to take care of the chickens the government took from the chicken farmers. The government gives you as much milk and eggs as the regulations say you need.

FASCISM: You have two cows. The government takes both, hires you to take care of them and sells you the milk.

PURE COMMUNISM: You have two cows. Your neighbors help you take care of them, and you all share the milk.

RUSSIAN COMMUNISM: You have two cows. You have to take care of them, but the government takes all the milk.

CAMBODIAN COMMUNISM: You have two cows. The government takes both of them and shoots you.

DICTATORSHIP: You have two cows. The government takes both and drafts you.

PURE DEMOCRACY: You have two cows. Your neighbors decide who gets the milk.

REPRESENTATIVE DEMOCRACY: You have two cows. Your neighbors pick someone to tell you who gets the milk.

BUREAUCRACY: You have two cows. At first the government regulates what you can feed them and when you can milk them. Then it pays you not to milk them. Then it takes both, shoots one, milks the other and pours the milk down the drain. Then it requires you to fill out forms accounting for the missing cows.

PURE ANARCHY: You have two cows. Either you sell the milk at a fair price or your neighbors try to take the cows and kill you.

LIBERTARIAN/ANARCHO-CAPITALISM: You have two cows. You sell one and buy a bull.

SURREALISM: You have two giraffes. The government requires you to take harmonica lessons.

Offline detch01

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Politics explained
« Reply #1 on: August 22, 2005, 02:03:52 PM »
Being a good Canadian, I am a surrealist.


asw
asw
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semper in excretio, solum profundum variat

Offline Skydancer

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Politics explained
« Reply #2 on: August 22, 2005, 06:08:25 PM »
Yep I'm still a pure socialist.:D

Offline DREDIOCK

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Politics explained
« Reply #3 on: August 22, 2005, 06:35:28 PM »
Anarchist.

I want Skydancers cows :D
Death is no easy answer
For those who wish to know
Ask those who have been before you
What fate the future holds
It ain't pretty

Offline Skydancer

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Politics explained
« Reply #4 on: August 22, 2005, 06:37:34 PM »
:lol

Offline lazs2

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Politics explained
« Reply #5 on: August 23, 2005, 08:34:43 AM »
"PURE SOCIALISM: You have two cows. The government takes them and puts them in a barn with everyone else's cows. You have to take care of all of the cows. The government gives you as much milk as you need."

no... they give you as much milk as the people in power think you should have but... given your lowly status and inability to think for yourself... if will be much much less that they and their friends (who don't care for any cows) will get.

lazs

Offline Skydancer

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Politics explained
« Reply #6 on: August 23, 2005, 06:44:46 PM »
Nope according to the above what you are describing is basicaly

BUREAUCRATIC SOCIALISM: You have two cows. The government takes them and put them in a barn with everyone else's cows. .....blah blah.......The government gives you as much milk...blah....as the regulations say you need.

I'm still a pure socialist! ( well maybe not so pure ) Power to the people, one for all and all for one and so on.