(translation of the apology)
"As you may be aware, polls in Norway have shown that the most people believe a terrorist attack is immenent and we wish to apologize to hopefully decrease that risk.
In the future, all civilized countries will refrain from mocking the Muslim religion in fear of violent reprisals... you have won and we shall remove any freedoms of speech as they relate to mocking the Muslim religion.
Off-topic, we may be able to have our spines replaced with something that doesn't have the consistency of jello."