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Author Topic: Colonoscopies  (Read 296 times)

Offline Mitchell

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Colonoscopies
« on: March 27, 2006, 08:30:42 AM »
I just go this email and felt that I should share it, I don't know if its been posted before but...



Colonoscopies are no joke, but these comments during the exame were quite humorous.  A physician clamed that the following are actual comments made by his patients while he was performing their colonoscopies.

1. "Take it easy, Doc. Your boldly going where no man has gone before!"

2. "Find Amelia Earhart yet?"

3. "Can you hear me now?"

4. "Are we there yet? Are we there yet?..."

5. "You know, in Arkansas, we're now legaly married."

6. "Any sign of the trapped miners, Chief?"

7. "You put your left hand in, you take your left hand out..."

8. "Hey! Now I know how a Muppet feels!"

9. "If your hand doesen't fit, you must quit!"

10. "Hey Doc, let me know if you find my dignity!"

11. "You used to be an executive at Enron, didn't you?"

12. "God, now I know why I'm not gay."

And the best one

13. "Could you write a note for my wife saying that my head is not up there?"  :rofl
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Offline Curval

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Colonoscopies
« Reply #1 on: March 27, 2006, 09:04:45 AM »
1. "Take it easy, Doc. Your boldly going where no man has gone before!"


lol
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Offline Flatbar

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Colonoscopies
« Reply #2 on: March 27, 2006, 12:30:57 PM »
On a serious note...

Those of you over 40-45 should schedule one. As distastefull as the prep for this procedure is and the indignity of lying there waiting to volultarily let someone probe you with a foreign object. The results, if negative, will give you a sense of relief that's hard to describe.

Another plus to this procedure is that, these days, they'll take pictures in your chute and let you take them home to show all your friends that you, infact, don't have your head stuck firmly up there.
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Offline wheez

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Colonoscopies
« Reply #3 on: March 27, 2006, 07:52:31 PM »
When I had mine done I got to watch the "hole" thing on T.V.






Wheez
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Offline OOZ662

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Colonoscopies
« Reply #4 on: March 27, 2006, 09:44:29 PM »
I can't wait to grow up.
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Offline Dago

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Colonoscopies
« Reply #5 on: March 27, 2006, 10:04:39 PM »
Quote
Originally posted by OOZ662
I can't wait to grow up.


lol
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Offline Nomde

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Re: Colonoscopies
« Reply #6 on: March 27, 2006, 10:16:43 PM »
Quote
Originally posted by Mitchell
"Could you write a note for my wife saying that my head is not up there?"  :rofl

Not True..... My doc went so far up I think he found mine, cause I sure as hell felt that scope in the back of my neck.  :D
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Offline AWMac

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Colonoscopies
« Reply #7 on: March 27, 2006, 10:32:06 PM »
Had mine done last year..I think...or was it the year before...dam, Feel like Reagan now..well not now but before he died... Butt anyways... They played good Nurse, Bad Nurse on me.  Like it was a game, no dinner..had to drink alotta this nasty stuff 24 hrs before, no movie other than a scope going up some assshat.. and no flowers. Not even a kiss on the neck.... when I came to I was in a recovery room bed fartin my asss off...  Now with that all said and all, I'm healthy down there, no lost socks found, no lost car keys, no Mexican Immigrants hiding out, no rodents.

Soon I have my physical.  I have a tall blonde female Dr. *Family Practice*  she has long thin fingers she's about 28 years old and tall. Gonna ask her to "Double up" on me and go REAL slow during the Prostrat exam... might ask for a second opinion too..not to bad for a $15 copay...  err wait what was the topic of this thread?

Never mind...


:huh

Mac
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