Originally posted by Saintaw
I have no idea who this "Chucky Cheese" is but it looks like it makes jackal fart bullets...
Actualy it is Chuck E. Cheese. It is a franchise chain of pizza joints that specialize in catering parties for kid groups. At least that is what they claim openly. In reality they are torture chambers designed solely to torment adults to the point of babbling insanity and the habit of turning your pockets inside out in a futile attempt to make it stop.
Where a kid can be a kid is the logo. It roughly translates into where a kid can evily fleece adults and dish out unbearable torment untethered.
Games, rides (all to the tune of the evil tokens that can be purchased by any adult in quanities equaling a king`s ransom). There are live shows put on by staff in furry costumes, Chuck E. Cheese being the largest and most evil of them all. I believe the staff qualifications require that you had to be a child of parents who locked you in a dark closet and fed you nothing but jelly beans for days on end. Revenge! I do beleive if any link in your family tree can be found to the Manson family this also will qualify you.
The pizza is made from discarded cardboard boxs that have been retrieved from various dumpsters and disguised to look almost like food with the exception of the inflated price tags.
The live show tunes and skits are designed in such a way that the noise is not damaging to kid`s ears, but is excruiating to any adult within a ten block area.
Ahhhhh but the games and rides. Take twenty kids, issue tokens. I think it was a clever code that was made by The fine folks at Chuck E. and only known to kids that no two kids ever run out of tokens in the same time period. Don`t know how they do it. The kids that run out first and at specialy timed intervals are those who can break glass with their "Whaaaaaaaaaa I`m outa tokens and
still has some . Whaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa! I want tokens!" By this time in your trip to hell you have reached the point of out turned pockets mentioned above.
Also there is some kind of time warp from the first moment you enter the place. Two hours in normal time is somewhere in the neighborhood of a month in Chuck`s place.
Then to top it all off is the pyramid scam they have going. Perpetual torture, I like to call it. When some unsuspecting parent, grandparent, uncle , aunt, first cousin twice removed, etc. is tricked into booking an initial BD party it snowballs from there. When you are nothing more than a babbling bag of bones and your time in hell is up, you exit with a sigh of relief. Then it happens. Usualy in the parking lot. "Oh boy that was fun! My birthday is next week and I want to have my party here .
It`s evil. It`s torture. ....................It`s perpetual hell in a furry mouse suit I tell ya. 
