Author Topic: CONFIDENTIAL: HT's plans to speed up development...  (Read 187 times)

eazydweeb

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CONFIDENTIAL: HT's plans to speed up development...
« on: March 20, 2000, 09:35:00 AM »
TO: ALL EMPLOYEES

FROM: PERSONNEL DEPT.

SUBJECT: REST ROOM PRIVILEGES


In the past, employees were permitted to make trips to the rest room
under informal guidelines. Effective this date, a "Rest room Trip
Policy" (RTP) will be established to provide a consistent method of
accounting for each employee's rest room time.

Under this policy, a "Rest room Trip Bank" (RTB) will be established for
each employee. The first day of each month, employees will be given a
"Rest room Trip Credit" (RTC) of 20. RTCs can be accumulated from month
to month.

Within two weeks, the entrance to all rest rooms are being equipped with
personal identification stations and computer linked voice recognition
devices. Before the end of March, each employee must provide the
Personnel Dept. with two copies of voice prints, one normal and one
under stress. The voice print recognition will be in operation, but not
restrictive, for the rest of the month. Employees should acquaint
themselves with these station during this period.

If an employee's RTB balance reaches zero, the doors to the rest rooms
will not unlock for that employee's voice until the first of the next
month. In addition, all all rest room stalls are being equipped with
timed paper roll retractors. If the stall is occupied for more than
three minutes, an alarm will sound. Thirty seconds after the alarm
sounds, the roll of paper in the stall will retract, the toilet will
flush, and the stall door will open. If the stall seat remains
occupied, your picture will be taken.

The picture will then be posted in the hallways. This is being done to
eliminate dilly-dalling in the rest rooms. Anyone's picture showing up
three times will be immediately terminated.

If there are any questions regarding the above policy, don't hesitate to
speak with your supervisor or the Personnel Dept.

Thank You,

Management
 

Offline Russian

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CONFIDENTIAL: HT's plans to speed up development...
« Reply #1 on: March 21, 2000, 12:17:00 PM »
Very creative