Author Topic: jet gets owned by bird  (Read 892 times)

Offline cpxxx

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jet gets owned by bird
« Reply #15 on: October 12, 2006, 11:46:28 AM »
Back to the jet video. Did anyone else notice that the warning voice sounded like a terribly posh Englishman!

Edit: Just realised it was a Canadian CT155 Hawk. Which explains the English Accent.
« Last Edit: October 12, 2006, 11:52:32 AM by cpxxx »

Offline mussie

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jet gets owned by bird
« Reply #16 on: October 12, 2006, 12:26:10 PM »
Yeah they noticed that when pilots heard the female warning voice (Falcon on the amiga anyone) the pilots forgot what they were doing and started searching through the pockets of their flight suit for a profolactic ........

Commonly the last thing recorded on the black box was
Female Warning Voice "Pull Up... Pull Up..."
Pilot " Just a sec babe gotta find some protection...."

Offline wooley

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jet gets owned by bird
« Reply #17 on: October 12, 2006, 12:28:06 PM »
Quote
Originally posted by cpxxx
Back to the jet video. Did anyone else notice that the warning voice sounded like a terribly posh Englishman!

Edit: Just realised it was a Canadian CT155 Hawk. Which explains the English Accent.


Pilot (breathing hard):- "Oh *expletive*...bird"

PLANE:- "Right Chaps - we're in a bit of a pickle here"

Pilot (breathing even harder):- "Turn at marker and restart..."

PLANE:- "Look old chap - I know you're frightfully busy, but did you know the landing gear isn't down?"

Pilot (hyperventilating):- "Prepare to abandon aircraft!!!"

PLANE:- "Well gentlemen, its been spiffing flying with you today, but I fear it might be best if you were to shove off now"

Pilot:- "EJECT, EJECT, EJECT"

PLANE:- "Rule Britannia, Britannia rule the waves. Britain never ever eve....CRASH"

Offline mussie

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jet gets owned by bird
« Reply #18 on: October 12, 2006, 12:46:54 PM »
Quote
Originally posted by wooley
Pilot (breathing hard):- "Oh *expletive*...bird"

PLANE:- "Right Chaps - we're in a bit of a pickle here"

Pilot (breathing even harder):- "Turn at marker and restart..."

PLANE:- "Look old chap - I know you're frightfully busy, but did you know the landing gear isn't down?"

Pilot (hyperventilating):- "Prepare to abandon aircraft!!!"

PLANE:- "Well gentlemen, its been spiffing flying with you today, but I fear it might be best if you were to shove off now"

Pilot:- "EJECT, EJECT, EJECT"

PLANE:- "Rule Britannia, Britannia rule the waves. Britain never ever eve....CRASH"



HAHA Nice one......


The Aussie one goes somthing like this

Pilot (breathing hard):- "Struth what the *expletive*.was that... A  *expletive* bird.... Oh *expletive* I dropped me *expletive* beer...  "

PLANE:- "Well thats just *expletive* great... The motor's *expletive* stuffed now... Hey Mate I think were up *expletive* creek with out a *expletive* paddle... And your *expletive*beers just rolled under the *expletive* RIO's Seat"

Pilot (Yelling even harder):- "I am not landing this *expletive* Plane till someone gets me another *expletive* beer..."

PLANE:- "Oi Dip *expletive* the *expletive* gears still up ? your gonna *expletive* crash into the *expletive*ground... "

Pilot (Yelling at the RIO ):- "Right time to *expletive* eject...  but Reach under your seat and grab that *expletive* beer first !!!"

PLANE:- "What do you mean Eject Where the *expletive* hell do you think you *expletive* going... "

Pilot:- "EJECT, EJECT, EJECT"

PLANE:- "*expletive* you.... ya big *expletive* wipe... that *expletive* ground looks *expletive* hard  "

Offline cpxxx

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jet gets owned by bird
« Reply #19 on: October 12, 2006, 12:51:35 PM »
Pretty much sums it up for me. :rofl :rofl  Poor old Hawk died with a stiff upper lip.
Now imagine if the jet was American

Pilot (breathing hard):- "Oh *expletive*...bird"

PLANE:- "Gentlemen,  we have a major malfunction. Situation is not nominal. We are going down, Repeat we are going down"

Pilot (breathing even harder):- "Turn at marker and restart..."

PLANE:- "Landing gear, landing gear. We are in deep dodo."

Pilot (hyperventilating):- "Prepare to abandon aircraft!!!"

PLANE:- " Get the hell out. I can't hold it. I can't hold it"

Pilot:- "EJECT, EJECT, EJECT"

PLANE:- "Oh man this is gonna hurt....CRASH"

Offline eskimo2

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jet gets owned by bird
« Reply #20 on: October 12, 2006, 03:49:47 PM »
Pilot (breathing hard):- "Oh La La, *expletive*...bird"

PLANE:- "Excusez-moi!  Zee birds are winning; recommend surrender!"

Pilot (breathing even harder):- "I surrender!  I surrender!”

PLANE:- "Gear lowered; white flag waving.  Gear lowered; white flag waving."

Pilot (hyperventilating):- "Au revoir"

PLANE:- "Bon voyage!"

Pilot:- "EJECT, EJECT, EJECT"

PLANE:- "It suddenly smells better in here…"

Offline Panzzer

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jet gets owned by bird
« Reply #21 on: October 12, 2006, 03:59:04 PM »
A BAe Hawk of the Finnish Air Force crashed a couple of weeks ago in the dark after a bird got sucked in the engine. A flock of birds had gotten in to the flight path.

"A Hawk lead-in trainer crashed off the southern end of the runway at Kruunupyy Airport at approximately 2220 hours on September 28. The pilot had just initiated climb following a practice instrument approach when he heard a loud bang and the engine flamed out. Restart attempts failed so he elected to eject, escaping uninjured."

As the quote from the FiAF website says, the pilot escaped uninjured. He then got to the nearest road, stopped a jogger and called the emergency number. Pilot: "Hello, there's been a plane crash near the Kruunupyy air field."
Operator: "How do you know this?"
Pilot: "I was the pilot of the plane."
Well, the operator didn't believe him at first, but when they received several phone calls from that area, they sent a fire team (I think they might have dispatched one from the airfield sooner) to the location. And this one's true. :)
Panzzer - Lentorykmentti 3

Offline Wolfala

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jet gets owned by bird
« Reply #22 on: October 12, 2006, 04:10:41 PM »
http://www.flight-level.com/dogfight/benji53.mp3

F-16 engine failure during Gulf War 91.

History of the Engagement
On February 17th, 1991, Captain Scott "Spike" Thomas, flying with the 19th FS and 363rd TFW temporarily based at King Khalid Military City, was flying a night interdiction mission in his F-16C with the codename of "Benji 53". As the package was coming off of station (egress), his F-16 experience engine problems. Early reports suggested he had been hit by a Surface to Air Missile (SAM), but it cannot be confirmed. Thomas's wingman, 1LT Eric "Neck" Dodson, came to his aid and helped him nurse his plane closer to the Iraq-Saudi Arabia-Kuwait border, nearly 40-60 miles south of their position. Dodson assumed control of most radio communictions bewtween AWACs (Bulldog), leaving Thomas free to fly his injured plane.
With less than 30 miles to go to the border, and his plane leaking what appeared to be fuel, Thomas and his wingman realize his F-16 is beginning to develope a catastrophic engine fire. With a valiant effort to get as close as he could, Thomas finally decides to eject over enemy territory. His radio contact is spotty once he is on the ground, but Search and Rescue helicopters (a package of 2 UH-60 Blackhawks and 1 MH-53J Pave Low, along with F-15E's providing Close Air Support), located his position roughly 2 hours later. The F-15E's were called in to engage an approaching Iraqi truck with cluster bombs during the extraction.

During debrief, it was realized that an SA-7 Surface to Air Missile (SAM) had been shot at the rescue helicopter in which Thomas was riding, but the missile was out of range and landed short. It was also learned that Thomas had less than 1 hour of freedom, as there were Iraqi troops within 2 miles of him in 2 different directions.


Crew/Description
----------------------------

Benji 53 (F-16C Block 25C, Serial 84-1218)
- Pilot: Captain Scott "Spike" Thomas (BEN53)

Benji 31 (F-16C, ?)- Wingman
- Pilot: 1LT Eric "Neck" Dodson (BEN31)

Bulldog (XX)?
- AWACs E-3 Sentry (BULL)


UKN1- "Benji 31, Victor."
BEN31- "Go ahead."
UKN1- "Roger ah, you headin' for Hafr Albatin?" (Emergency divert airfield, Hafr Albatin (OEPA)
BEN54- "Ah, negative. Right now we are going straight towards the border, the closest route. You've got the--I've got the nearest divert for you, Hafr Albatin for one-thirty-four, is that what you've got?"
BEN53- "Yeah I got it, I'm not gonna make it."
BEN31- "Why not?"
BEN53- "I won't make it there, I'm ah looking to do a crossing and get out."
BEN31- "Is there something wrong still?"
BEN53- "This is all I can get man. Neck, I'm gonna go a little bit--I'm going less than max range. I guess I should go max endurance."
BEN31- "What's your FTIT and, ah, RMP rate?"
BEN53- "Okay, my FTIT rate is 870, RMPs 94, I'm just not gettin' any thrust. Oil pressure's at 40."
BEN31- "Okay, lemme come back and look at you again, okay?"
BEN53- "Cool."
BEN31- "Dude, I'm gonna punch my tanks out (interrupted "No we're good) so I can stay with you, all right?"
BEN53- "Cool."
BEN31- "Ah, what's your gas rate at?"
BEN53- "46."
BULL- "And Five-three, you have some friendlies north four."
{SOUNDS OF EARLY WARNING RECEIVER, FRIENDLY F-16's LOCKING BENJI 53 ON THEIR RADAR}
BEN31- "You are leakin' tons of fluid and it looks like gas, that's why I am wondering what your gas is."
BEN53- "Okay."
BEN31- "It's all comin' out right where the hook meets the engine."
BEN53- "Copy. Okay, how far do I have to go . . . to the border?"
BULL- "Border is 60 miles."
BEN53- "I might make it Neck."
BEN31- "Yeah, you will Homer, man, don't worry."
BULL- "And Benji, ah, your friendlies are tally with you."
BEN53- "Copy."
BEN31- "Is this all the airspeed you can get?"
BEN53- "That's it man. I can dump the nose, but I really don't want to. I wanna keep this wing goin' for me."
BEN31- "Yeah."
BULL- "Five-three, ah, confirm you're a single-ship?"
BEN53- "Negative. I've got a wingman here."
BULL- "Roge."
BEN31- "Ya know Spikey, if you need some more lift, you might want to throw your flaps down."
BULL- "Five-three, border is, ah, 55 miles."
BEN53- "Copy. Think I'll hang out for a little while, Neck."
BEN53- "Okay."
BULL- "Roge."
BEN31- "Say distance to border, Bu-Bulldog."
BULL- "Border 54."
BEN31- "Understand you've got, ah, choppers in the air?"
BULL- "Benji, you want choppers?"
BEN31- "That's affirm (?). You guys better scramble them now!"
BULL- "Roge."
BEN31- "Vector 'em to where we're gonna be."
UKN1- "(?) Five-one, did you copy that?"
BEN31- How you doin' Homer?"
BEN53- "Hangin' in man."
BEN31- "Cool. I'm with you all the way."
UKN- "Roger, did copy."
BEN53- "I'm gonna try the flaps (interrupted)."
BULL- "Benji, border 50."
BEN31- "Copy 50. Bulldog, Benji."
BULL- "Benji, go ahead."
BEN31- "Copy, understand that ah, this border area is pretty clear with threats?"
BULL- "That's affirm, I'll check for ya."
BEN31- "Check please."
BEN53- "Flaps up a little bit Homie."
BEN31- "Cool."
BEN53- "That and my AOA is down a little bit."
BULL- "And Five-three, we're checkin' for ya."
BEN53- "Okay."
UKN1- "Benji 41." Did he mean Benji 31? UKN1 is the same pilot from the beginning of recording.
BEN31- "Go."
UKN1- "Anything we can do to help?"
BEN31- "Say again?"
UKN1- "Anything I can do to help?"
BEN31- "Ah, you might wanna get on a tanker, get some gas and be able to, ah, help with SAR."
UKN1- "Okay."
BULL- "Five-three, border 44."
BEN31- "Eight staff (?), left ten."
- "Benji 1, Benji 2 Victor."
BULL- "Benji Five-three, if you could squawk emergency please."
BEN31- "Do you got that Spike or do you want me to do it?"
BEN53- "Yeah, I got it. I dunno if that's such a good idea, is it?"
BEN31- "I dunno. Bulldog, Benji, is that a good idea right where we're at?"
BULL- "That's what I was instructed, ah, I'd say no, I've got a good contact with you."
BEN31- "Okay, good, keep that contact. Do you got choppers in the air?"
BULL- "Affirm, they are on their way."
BEN31- "Copy that."
BEN53- "Bummer dudes."
BEN31- "Wh-What's goin' on man?"
BEN53- "Just bummer."
BEN31- "Okay, now you've got fire comin' out of your engine. Looks like it's fallin'."
BEN53- "What's fallin'?"
BEN31- "Well, it looks like you've got sparks and **** comin' out of your engine now."
BEN53- "Okay. Bulldog."
BULL- "Go ahead."
BEN53- "Okay, I-I'm havin' a more serious problem now, okay?"
BULL- "Roge."
BEN31- "Understand, choppers are in the air?"
BULL- "That's affirm. Border 40."
BEN31- "Neck, you tell me if you see any fire."
BEN31- "Okay, it's red sparks poppin' out right now."
BEN53- "Okay, just tell me if you see a fire."
BEN31- "Okay. Stay with it dude."
{Fire Begins}
BEN31- Okay, you're-"
BEN53- "I-I'm gettin' out!"
BEN31- "Okay, you're on fire."
{Ejection seat}
BEN31- "Okay, Bulldog, we've got him out, we've got him out! He's out of the --"
{Unknown Horn} Possibly stall horn, or engine-out horn in Benji 53 cockpit (plane is now gliding pilotless, did not explode)
BEN31- "Bulldog, we have a good chute. Bulldog, Benji, do you copy?"
BULL- "I copy, marked."
{Sound of rushing wind, still recording inside Benji 53?}


the best cure for "wife ack" is to deploy chaff:    $...$$....$....$$$.....$ .....$$$.....$ ....$$

Offline 1895

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jet gets owned by bird
« Reply #23 on: October 12, 2006, 04:16:09 PM »
Old, VERY