Letter to Dad :
A father passing by his son's bedroom was astonished to see that
his bed was nicely made and everything was picked up. Then he
saw, propped up prominently on the pillow, an envelope that was
addressed to "Dad."
With the worst premonition, he opened the envelope with
trembling hands and read the letter:
"Dear Dad"
It is with great regret and sorrow that I'm writing you. I had
to elope with my new girlfriend because I wanted to avoid a
scene with mom and you.
I have been finding real passion with Stacy, and she is so nice.
But I knew you would not approve of her because of all her
piercings, tattoos, tight motorcycle clothes, and the fact that
she is much older than I. But it's not only the passion,
Dad...she's pregnant.
Stacy said that we will be very happy.
She owns a trailer in the woods and has a stack of firewood for
the whole winter. We share a dream of having many more children.
Stacy has opened my eyes to the fact that marijuana doesn't
really hurt anyone.
We'll be growing it for ourselves and trading it with the other
people that live nearby for cocaine and ecstasy. In the
meantime, we will pray that science will find a cure for AIDS so
Stacy can get better.
She deserves it.
Don't worry, Dad. I'm 15 and I know how to take care of myself.Someday I'm sure that we will be back to visit so that you can
get to know your grandchildren.
Love,
Your Son
John
P.S. Dad, none of the above is true. I'm over at Tommy's house.
I just wanted to remind you that there are worse things in life
than the report card that's in my center desk drawer.
I love you. Call me when it's safe to come home...
