I’ll bring my snow cone maker and we can eat them really fast and get headaches. I’ll also bring a couple tubs of Beg Gay; we can rub it on our balls. Hot wax hair remover might be fun as well; my arm and leg hair has finally grown back. All this while snorting Tabasco Sauce and watching this movie!
Hey!
Some movies are just plain bad. They simply suck at all levels.
The Sweetest Thing, for example, that I had to watch with my wife. No redeeming value. I like this review:
The Sweetest Thing is expressly for idiots who don't care what kind of sewage they shovel into their mental gullets to simulate sustenance.
But... some of us appreciate the Mystery Science Theater 3000 experience, and actually like to generate the quips ourselves in the process. Now the difference between painful and sublime b-fest is a bit hard to explain in words, but as the old saying about porn goes... "you know it if you see it." This is B-fest Oscar material.
Here you have the ripped off video and ripped off soundtrack and the horrible editing. You have horrible bluescreen effects with bad continuity issues. The added "new" special effects (as in special ed) would do Ed Wood Proud. Then there are the furbees and the martial arts segments. The robot that is a garbage can with a yellow caution light on top. The fact that it takes itself seriously.
The subtitled version 1K3 posted is even funnier, but not really needed after the exposition portion at the beginning. Needless to say, the protective shield around earth made out of human brain cells is a classic. All the bad guys need to do is to capture a human brain to decipher the secret to penetrate the shield... (sample quip: You're gonna be mighty disappointed if it happens to be the director...badda bing!)
Pearl Harbor is actually a great b-fest movie for this board, more so than an average audience. We can spot all the historical flaws (that non WW2 geeks would miss), like the bomb arming spinner that is misused for dramatic effect (watch out, when that spinner stops it's gonna blow!) Even so, PH has enough continuity errors etc to fully qualify for a general audience.
As noted Greaser's Palace is a classic, as is Neil Young's Human Highway (only on laser disk).
Not to be confused with cult classics like Repo Man or Return of the Living Dead, which are also way cool:)
Charon
