Good jokes...

[Meatwad]

[Meatwad]

Sorry Texasmom, I have been a BAAAAD meatwad

[McFarland]

During their silver anniversary, a wife reminded her husband: Do you remember when you proposed to me, I was so overwhelmed that I didn't talk for an hour?' The hubby replied: 'Yes, honey, that was the happiest hour of my life.'

[Hornet33]

Soldier Responds to Chelsea Clinton

Did you hear the story about Chelsea Clinton and the soldier who was serving in the Middle East?

Chelsea asked him about fear...

He said there were only 3 things he was afraid of --

"Osama,


Obama
 

and Yo Mama."

[Holden McGroin]

Two East Tennessee hunters were dragging their dead deer back to their car. Another hunter approached pulling his along too. 'Hey, I don't want to tell you how to do something, but I can tell you that it's much easier if you drag the deer so the antlers won't dig into the ground.'

After the third hunter left, the two decided to try it.

A little while later one hunter said to the other, 'You know, that guy was right. This is a lot easier!'

The other added 'Yeah, but we're getting farther and farther away from the truck!'

[McFarland]

A blonde goes to a park and grabs a little boy. She writes a note saying "I've kidnapped your son leave. $10,000 under the tree in the park". Being a blonde, however she didn't leave the note there, but on the boy's chest and sent him home. The next day she gets a note with $10,000 saying "How could you do this to a fellow blonde?"

[Holden McGroin]

A guy walks into a bar in East Tennessee and orders a white wine. Everybody sitting around the bar looks up, expecting to see some pitiful yankee queer.

The bartender looks up and says, "You ain't from around here, are ya??? Where ya from, boy?"

The guy says, "I'm from Iowa."

The bartender asks, "What the heck you do in Iowa?"

The guy responds, "I'm a taxidermist."

The bartender asks, "A taxidermist? Now just what the heck is a taxidermist?"

The guy says nervously, "I mount animals."

The bartender grins and shouts out to the whole bar,
"It's okay boys, he's one of us!"

[Holden McGroin]

An East Tennessee man and his new bride were on their honeymoon. The husband jumps into bed to wait for his wife to get herself ready.

The bride comes out of the bathroom in a sexy negligee and says, 'Honey, I have something to tell you. I'm a virgin.'

The man grabs his clothes and rushes out of the house yelling at the top of his lungs. He heads straight to his father's house.

When he gets there, his father says, 'Son, what are you doing here? You're supposed to be on your honeymoon!'

The son says, 'Dad, my new wife told me a big secret of hers. She's a virgin!'

'God, son! You did the right thing by leaving. If she wasn't good enough for her own kin, she sure as heck isn't good enough for ours!'

[klingan]

[mensa180]

Channel 200.

[trax1]

Setting: The late 1800's.

A cowboy is riding his horse one day when he comes upon a tribe of Indians, the chief tells the cowboy that he is going to die for all the crimes the white man has committed against the Indians.  The chief tells him that they will perform a ceremony first by smoking a pipe before they kill him, so the cowboy asks if he can speak to his horse first, and the chief says yes.  So the cowboy goes over and whispers in the horse's ear, and the horse runs off.

A short time later the horse returns with a beautiful blond on it's back, the cowboy asks the chief if since he's going to be killed if he can have sex with her first, so the chief agrees and the cowboy goes to get the girl off the horse, he again whispers in it's ear and it runs off again, so he takes the girl into a tee-pee and has sex with her.

After he finishes he comes out and the horse has again returned this time with a beautiful brunette on it's back.  Again the cowboy asks if since he's gonna die if he can have sex with her, and the chief agrees.  The cowboy goes over to the horse to get the girl off, and again whispers in it's ear...he says to the horse "Alright listen you deaf MF'er I said posse!".