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Author Topic: How I learned I still have fast hands.  (Read 380 times)

Offline SteveBailey

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How I learned I still have fast hands.
« on: November 20, 2007, 12:36:57 AM »
It was a harrowing weekend. Saturday evening, Andrew went to the ER because he was all plugged up, hadn't pooped in 3 days.

Stacy took the girls to church Sunday after noon and still no poop from the big boy. Well, Stacy hadn't been gone for more than 15 minutes when I heard a very odd sort of.. "BLORP" from the kids play area downstairs. Took me a minute to think through what the sound was. Sure enough, Andrew had broken loose. I've never seen a diaper... oh never mind.. you get the idea. He proceeded to fill 3 more diapers in quick succession. Only my NASCAR pitcrew like diaper changing ability prevented a toxic waste spill... remember it had been in there for 3 days.... it was toxic.

By evening Andrew had developed a fever of almost 104 so when Stacy got back from church, Andrew had to go back to the ER. Fortunately it was nothing more than a bug he'd picked up somewhere and not related to his .... bowels. They didn't get home until 3AM though so we are really dragging today.

Andrew, being the generous soul that he is, is sharing his little bug with the other kids.. John is getting sick and no doubt the girls aren't far behind.

ah well, it's never boring!

Andrew was weighed each time he went to the ER.  He lost a full pound between visits...think about it..... that's a lot of poop out of a toddler.
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Offline Wolfala

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How I learned I still have fast hands.
« Reply #1 on: November 20, 2007, 12:39:54 AM »
When I was a baby, my nickname was "Chief load in the pants"

I can relate brother!
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Offline JB88

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How I learned I still have fast hands.
« Reply #2 on: November 20, 2007, 02:21:38 AM »
sounds like someone else that i know...chief load in the post.

i won't mention names of course...as it's applicable to many.  ;)

glad to hear that it's just a bug and that the poo stoppage wasn't too serious steve.
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Offline DREDIOCK

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Re: How I learned I still have fast hands.
« Reply #3 on: November 20, 2007, 06:36:58 AM »
Quote
Originally posted by SteveBailey
It was a harrowing weekend. Saturday evening, Andrew went to the ER because he was all plugged up, hadn't pooped in 3 days.

Stacy took the girls to church Sunday after noon and still no poop from the big boy. Well, Stacy hadn't been gone for more than 15 minutes when I heard a very odd sort of.. "BLORP" from the kids play area downstairs. Took me a minute to think through what the sound was. Sure enough, Andrew had broken loose. I've never seen a diaper... oh never mind.. you get the idea. He proceeded to fill 3 more diapers in quick succession. Only my NASCAR pitcrew like diaper changing ability prevented a toxic waste spill... remember it had been in there for 3 days.... it was toxic.

By evening Andrew had developed a fever of almost 104 so when Stacy got back from church, Andrew had to go back to the ER. Fortunately it was nothing more than a bug he'd picked up somewhere and not related to his .... bowels. They didn't get home until 3AM though so we are really dragging today.

Andrew, being the generous soul that he is, is sharing his little bug with the other kids.. John is getting sick and no doubt the girls aren't far behind.

ah well, it's never boring!

Andrew was weighed each time he went to the ER.  He lost a full pound between visits...think about it..... that's a lot of poop out of a toddler.


Ahhh the memories.

"THOSE were the days my friend. I thought they'd NEVER end!"
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Offline Curval

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How I learned I still have fast hands.
« Reply #4 on: November 20, 2007, 06:43:19 AM »
My youngest boy had a huge pooping problem...or lack thereof.

On one occasion he went almost 10 days without going....he just refused.  So, we had to break out a disposable enema.

That was a treat to behold let me tell you.
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Offline Reschke

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How I learned I still have fast hands.
« Reply #5 on: November 20, 2007, 07:39:19 AM »
Same situation with my middle child. He absolutely refused to poop and that was at 3 y/o. The boy went about the same length of time as Curval's kid on regular occasions. We eventually had to put him on some of those fiber powders in his food twice a day to get him to go. His biggest fear was that he had been stopped up and had to go to the doctor and he ended up with blood in his poop from a small tear. But now we can't keep the little bugger out of the bathroom; he thinks he has to poop 4-5 times a day now.
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Offline Halo

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How I learned I still have fast hands.
« Reply #6 on: November 20, 2007, 07:52:16 AM »
Sounds like Toxic Baby Syndrome.  My oldest daughter had it once.  Smelled so bad I had to take a deep breath OUTSIDE of her room, dash in and clean what I could, dash out for another breath, repeat infinitum.  Thought I'd never get that diaper changed.

After that, since couldn't find any hazardous waste suits, just wore a welder's mask when I changed her diaper.  :eek:
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Offline Charge

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How I learned I still have fast hands.
« Reply #7 on: November 20, 2007, 09:39:19 AM »
"Only my NASCAR pitcrew like diaper changing ability prevented a toxic waste spill... remember it had been in there for 3 days.... it was toxic."

I have a same kind of poop-generator here and man I always wonder how can such a cute small person smell so bad when "the plug" finally pops. And if that is not all, another one is already inbound...

I wonder if my hands will chronically stink like a dunghill for the rest of my life...  :p

-C+
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Offline wooly15

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How I learned I still have fast hands.
« Reply #8 on: November 20, 2007, 10:39:23 AM »
My daughter, who has just mastered the "remove the diaper" trick, likes to demonstrate it immediately after poops.  It's a real treat to hear her in her crib at night say "I naked", I poopie daddy!"  I have learned to just grab the cleaner and a roll of paper towels before even going to look.  Any tips on securing the diaper?  Onezie night suits aren't working.
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Offline mentalguy

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How I learned I still have fast hands.
« Reply #9 on: November 20, 2007, 11:54:45 AM »
Duct tape?
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Offline VonMessa

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How I learned I still have fast hands.
« Reply #10 on: November 20, 2007, 12:53:59 PM »
This proves to me, beyond all doubt, that the human brain erases (or at least buries) traumatic experiences from the main stage of conscious thought.

     Thanks(?) for awakening some of my deeply repressed memories that I got to share with my own children.

     If the nightmares come back, I will forward the psychiatrist's bill to you.


     I'm waiting for the next Bud Light commercial:  "Here's to you, Mr. NASCAR-esque diaper changing man."

Steve, and good luck!

:rofl
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