The following is a definition of desperation....
Just before christmas, my Cougar bit the dust- the x-pot blew out big time. Despite all my cleaning attempts, it simply would not fire up.
So I look around for alternatives- I could get the hall sensor upgrade for the same price as a new HOTAS system, so why not, right?
So an email off to Cubby and I thought all would be well.
Almost 2 months later, I'm going out of my mind. I *need* my Jug. Badly.
So I do what any flightsim junkie would do- I fired up aces high, and tried to fly with the mouse/keyboard.
Couldn't take off to save my life.
Then a revelation- "The Training Arena Map!!!" The choir of angels sang as a bright light of optimism surrounded my desk, and with all the angst of a crack potato without her fix, I selected the proper arena and fired into offline practice (to fly with a mouse in an arena would be detrimental to both my image and my self confidence as a cyber-pilot, you know).
After selecting the proper country (good ol' Rookland), and the right field (you know the one
), I carefully doublecheck all my settings- mouse axes, with the wheel being the throttle- all good.
LAUNCH!
Gears up, nose down, and fired the engine- the Pratt and Whitney sounded GLORIOUS through my Klipsch speakers- the rumble of the woofer tingling my bare feet on the floor. I couldn't help myself. I firewalled the throttle and shrieked and cackled like an ADD tot on Christmas morning.
My cackling awoke my wife, who like a pimp with a pink suit and a stiff backhand reminded me that it was, in fact, bed time and I ran the risk of waking the baby boy.
Gathering my compsure, I turned my speakers down and opted for the headphones.
Below me I knew what lay in store- a circling group of drones just BEGGING to be shredded by my 8 .50 cals.
Power dive and I'm down to 5,000 feet in no time, screaming along at over 450 mph.
Throttle back, set up a shallow zoom, and go into the attack.
The first attempts will not be mentioned, but with 300 rounds left, I would not be denied.
That 190 suffered the wrath, and I threw my hands up in celebration, looking around for my adoring crowd.
Alas, they were asleep, and that's when it hit me.
This is desperation.
