Just an exercise in putting things into perspective...
Say a two plane flight is making its way into enemy territory. Say they spot a lone bandit. Now, the two ship flight has a choice. One of them can "duel" the bandit to the finish, or they can try to attack it as a team.
Now while the bandit would probably prefer the former, there are many defensible reasons for the two ship flight to choose the latter option-they are deep in enemy territory, there are a unknown number of bandits with unknown energy states that could enter the fight at any moment. So it is entirely logical and defensible for them to want to destroy the bandit they are engaging as quickly and efficiently as possible, so as to be better prepared for whatever they may be encountering in short order.
Let us imagine that our two ship flight knows what they are doing, and the bandit finds himself sandwiched between them and in a situation that is obviously not going to end well. If he has the speed, he might choose to dive towards help, or at least escape. Now from the viewpoint of the two attackers, this might be the action of a "lame runtard". But from the bandit's perspective, he is just diving away from a couple of
"lame gang-pickers" who tried to shoot him down with an unfair advantage.
So the bandit extends away, with two ships in pursuit. Perhaps the bandit drags them towards, say, a two plane flight from his own country. They engage, and our original bandit turns back to fight. Now the odds are three to two. From the original flight's perspective, the bandit is a "coward who ran until he had friends." From the bandit's point of view, 3 to 2 odds ARE fairer than 2 to 1, and those two cons deserve what they get for trying to "gang-bang" him in the first place...and so it goes.
Lack of a wide perspective of this sort is IMO how there comes to be so much wailing and gnashing of teeth on the forums about how "bad the game play has gotten lately." I don't have any brilliant solution for this problem, I get as frustrated as the next guy when circumstances go against me. My only advice is to take a deep breath, don't go in expecting a "fair" play from the other guy, and figure out what you need to do to get even, rather than getting mad.