Ways to get back at your wife #44
Find an empty whiskey bottle. Fill it with iced tea. (Alternatively, fill an empty vodka bottle with water.) Sit in front of the TV, bleary-eyed, your speech slurred, constantly sucking on the bottle. When your blushing bride asks why you are getting drunk every night, reply "Those old memories are coming back of when I used to have sex with sheep. I thought I’d gotten over it, but I guess not. mmmmmmmmmmmmmmm."
