ironic monkey business

[mechanic]

Monkey Phobia Woman Savaged By Macaques
7 hours 55 mins ago



Many of the primates remained hanging from her limbs as she lay collapsed with blood spurting from a "deep, deep hole" in her arm.

She was eventually rescued by Thai boatmen and was taken to Bangkok toejamet Hospital.

The horrific attack happened on Monkey Island near to the popular holiday island of toejamet in southern Thailand.

"I thought I was heading for safety under this rock in the shade, only to cool down," Mrs Darwell, from Peterborough, said.

"I laid the towel down and there were no monkeys in sight.

"The next thing I noticed, this monkey walked up next to me and I thought, oh dear, and I began to stand up to move away.

"Then, the monkey took my wrist and pounced on my right arm, sinking his teeth in and hung off it.

"He wouldn't let go; he was locked on. I was absolutely petrified."

Thai fishermen ran to the rescue after spotting more monkeys joining the assault and began prising them off.

Mrs Darwell said she had agreed to go on the Siam Sea Canoe tour with a friend to confront her fear of monkeys.

Her phobia had been triggered by her father bringing up a chimpanzee which she described as "positively evil".

She said: "I thought, this is it, I'm going to die, I'm going to be savaged by these monkeys - then I went into shock."

Mrs Darwell added: "I wouldn't have got off that bloody boat if the tour guide would have said at all that there was any danger, any risk, even the slightest risk."

Tour leader Mr Yongyut Buasod said: "We can't control the monkeys if they decide to bite someone, that's why we always warn the tourists.

"That day some people were teasing the monkeys. They don't necessarily attack the specific person teasing them."


http://uk.news.yahoo.com/5/20100618/tod-monkey-phobia-woman-savaged-by-macaq-870a197.html


I know I've done two threads from yahoo news this week, my appologies! This one just is hilarious, sorry for her but how funny life is.

[AWwrgwy]

They knew....



wrongway

[maddafinga]

They probably couldn't get to her to  help any quicker because the irony was so thick...


I've gotta say though, I suspect that it might be a blast to fight a bunch of monkeys.  I know, they bite, but I throw elbows and fists and knees and feet, headbutt and bite also.  It might be pretty exhilarating is all I'm saying!  You could always show a scar or two later in life and say "Yeah I got that one time fighting a bunch of monkeys in Thailand!"

[Ack-Ack]

I've gotta say though, I suspect that it might be a blast to fight a bunch of monkeys.  I know, they bite, but I throw elbows and fists and knees and feet, headbutt and bite also.  It might be pretty exhilarating is all I'm saying!  You could always show a scar or two later in life and say "Yeah I got that one time fighting a bunch of monkeys in Thailand!"

Monkey fist fights are cool but nothing is as cool as a monkey knife fight.



They're also used as cheap security guards in India guarding the street vendors.



ack-ack

[maddafinga]

Well if a monkey pulls a gun on me, he pretty much wins that one.  

The cowboy monkeys are the most likely to be packing a sidearm, based on what I hear..

[Ack-Ack]

Monkeys that are black belts in martial arts scare me, you know the first move they'll do is the "Monkey steal the peach".




ack-ack

[allaire]

Best island and hospital name ever!  Thanks for that lovely thought ack-ack.

[shreck]

Monkeys are gross