The connection is mechanical. The boom has a ring around it that allows the receiver receptacle to capture the boom with a set jaws that allows a pressure fitting and thus the flow of fuel. In a normal situation, when the boomer sees the scheduled off load of fuel, he/she will tell the receiver pilot "off load complete" and the receiver pilot will press an AR disconnect button on the stick that opens the jaws and releases the boom. The boomer then flies the boom clear and either stows it or readies it for the next receiver. The boomer also has a disconnect button in case he/she doesn't like what is happening on the other end of the boom. The other option is the brute force disconnect.
This picture has a fairly good view of the ring on the boom.

Here is a picture of the boom at full extension. The center green section has a yellow band. When the receiver is hooked up and in the perfect fore/aft and up/down position the end of the boom shroud will be on the yellow mark, or as it is referred to, "cutting the apple in half".

I've got a good close up of an F-106 receptacle that I can't locate right now, but will add it when located.
The Air Force uses the boom method and the Navy/Marines use the drogue method. I'm not sure if SAC initially started using the boom method or the fighter community. It might be one of those chicken or the egg situations.