UPDATE: Had surgery yesterday on the left wrist. Was suffering from what was called "Keinbocks Disease" and have been for many years but didn't know it and had been dealing with a compression fracture for nearly two years but didn't know exactly what was wrong. Some dead & broken bone removed, wrist fused then wrapped in a splint for 2 weeks then, going into a cast for 8 - 12 weeks. Soon to also be dealt with, herniated discs in the lower back L4, L5 & S1 with a rupture that they call an annular tear. It appears that the tear is worsening. Previous Radio Frequency Ablation of the Left S.I. joint (left hip, sciatic nerves) worked for a few months but wore off in November and new attention has to be given to that as well. Both knees that had been previously replaced and revised, replaced, revised, torn quads and revisions....lol, will also need work again soon. Will probably end up requiring a motorized wheelchair for assisted mobility. Wow, enough right? But wait. All of these afflictions as well as a few personal issues had also weighed heavily on my already diagnosed depression and PTSD (from my prior military service 1980 -1991) which created some severe personality changes which I tried to work out on my own.....unsuccessfully of course in the long run which lead to what would be considered a nervous breakdown. Decided to finally man up and ask for the appropriate help to get the head back on track. I believe due to such, within the game, I have created some distance, even hatred between previous friends which I am very regretful of. Asking for forgiveness from those former squadmates of Wings of Terror. Not asking to rejoin the squad, just your forgiveness and understanding as well as from those in the community that I may have rubbed wrong I.E. Pigs on the Wing with PorkyPig. In the middle of all of this, the personal life has suffered a great deal and am taking the time to see if it can be repaired.
This gents and ladies is what has been going on and I hope that this explanation clears up a few things with some of you. For those fellow Military Veterans in here and reading this, I hope that those who may be suffering from some of the same issues, depression and PTSD, can learn from my experiences. Don't be so damned proud as to not reach out to the many services and resources out there for help. It begins with you and may help exponentially with your loved ones, family and friends. Believe me, I know it takes a lot for an individual to admit they have problems and ask for help. Put the pride away and just do it. Save your life and those around you that care for and love you.
Salute Aces High! Thank you everyone for your kind words, thoughts and prayers. I hope that me, myself and I (
) can be back up in the unfriendly skies sometime by May.
Respectfully,
1MADDOG1
