joke for 8-14-2002

[sidthekid]

Kevin Says to Harry dude hate to say this but"Your wife has the greatest prettythang in the world" I'll pay you 5000 dollars just to touch it. Harry looks him in the eye and say 's dude Thats not right she's my wife . I know man but its perfect i'll give you 10,ooo dollars. Harry tells his wife she ask's are you crazy, honey he says he'sbugging the toejam out of me and he is willing to pay 10,000 dollars just to touch your prettythang all you have to do is wear a dress pull it up show him your naked butT and let him touch it with both hands. Okay she says but i get the money. so the day comes kevin shows up to their house harry and his wife are waitng in living room, kevin walks in and she walks over pulls her dress up bends over and before kevin is the perfect prettythang, He "SCREAMS OH MY GOD ITS BETTER THAN I THOUGHT, at that moment harry yells" FOR CHRIST SAKE TOUCH IT ALREADY"  Kevin says " I can't" why says harry.  BECAUSE i DON'T HAVE THE MONEY

[JimBear]

A CNN reporter went to Israel to cover the fighting. She was looking for something emotional and positive and of human interest. Something like the man in Sarajevo who risked his life to play the cello everyday in the town square.  In Jerusalem, she heard about an old Jew who's been going to the Wailing Wall to pray, twice a day, everyday, for a long, long time. So she went to check it out.  She went to the Wailing Wall and there he was! She watches him pray and after about 45 minutes, when he turns to leave, she approaches him for an interview.  
"Rebecca Smith, CNN News. Sir, how long have you been coming to the Wailing Wall and praying?"
"For about 50 years."
"What do you pray for?"
"For peace between the Jews and the Arabs. For all the hatred to stop.  For our children to grow up in safety and friendship."
"How do you feel after doing this for 50 years?"
"Like I'm talking to a wall."

[Epsilon 5]

LOL! good one JimBear ... so true also