Author Topic: Remember our thread about monitoring your childrens web? (Read 897 times)

SaburoS · « **Reply #30 on:** October 29, 2002, 01:03:17 AM »

Quote

Originally posted by Ripsnort
If your not "intruding" in your childs life to the point that you know what they're up to, then your not doing your job. Kids that go unattended, or parents don't know who, where, what, when they're doing it, have the problems...trust me, I was one of those kids! Yes, monitor their activity.

Kudos Rip! Right on. S! It is every parents job to be a parent, not a fair weather friend. Kids left to their own devices without supervision usually end up hurting themselves or others....or worse.

capt. apathy · « **Reply #31 on:** October 29, 2002, 09:52:16 AM »

a childs right to privacy from there parents is a myth made up by children. about the only people who agree that a children have a right to parts of their life are children and college students (who are mostly children with drinking privleges), some parents believe kids should have privacy, and they say very suportive things to each other as the hang out in the waiting room, to pick their kids up at juvie

Thrawn · « **Reply #32 on:** October 29, 2002, 01:17:18 PM »

When as said "when our children get older", I ment mid and late teens.

vorticon · « **Reply #33 on:** October 29, 2002, 01:21:26 PM »

midnight Target

i am 14 and have unrestricted access when parents around and when there not but i never get in trouble...prolly cause i never go t ochat rooms to busy with AH (and if its the porn your worrying about...forget it if she has a boyfreind...thats what there for...if she doesnt then maybe you should take a look at the log files)

Ripsnort · « **Reply #34 on:** October 29, 2002, 01:22:11 PM »

Quote

Originally posted by Thrawn
When as said "when our children get older", I ment mid and late teens.

Thats when you need to most involved in their lives, intrusion-wise. Until they're 18 naturally. What you don't know might kill them.

Incidently, I don't mean being tyrannical about it, theres a way to be "intrusive" without them finding it objective. One example is keeping them busy with sports..

Thrawn · « **Reply #35 on:** October 29, 2002, 01:43:27 PM »

So you're going to watch your boys shower when they're 15 Rip? What if they want to make out with a girl, are you going to intrude then? Don't you think they might start to resent you? Don't you think they might have their own business which my be none of yours? Would you read thier diary if they had one?

I think that if my wife and I raise them right, and they earn our trust, then they deserve that trust.

Ripsnort · « **Reply #36 on:** October 29, 2002, 01:50:06 PM »

You're taking it too literally Thrawn.

Know where they are.
Know who their friends are.
Know what they're doing (Going to a Movie? which one? Who's driving? Who's going with?)
Set rules the must follow (In by, say, Midnight on a Friday night)
etc.
etc.

I might add, my wife really disliked her "intrusive" father until she became an adult, then one day she went up to him and gave him a big hug, and said "Dad, thanks for being strict with me when I was a teenager"....She'd never seen him cry until that point. It was a cry of relief for him, because we believe that he thought he was too strict with her, she believes not.

Thrawn · « **Reply #37 on:** October 29, 2002, 01:58:46 PM »

Gotcha.

Sandman · « **Reply #38 on:** October 29, 2002, 01:59:18 PM »

As Thrawn as pointed out, a child's right to privacy is not a black/white sort of issue.

Certainly, children deserve some form of privacy. It's a form of respect and they need to learn the value of it.

Still... they have to understand that I may stomp all over their rights if I think it's in their best interest to do so.

Ripsnort · « **Reply #39 on:** October 29, 2002, 02:07:33 PM »

Quote

Originally posted by Sandman_SBM
Still... they have to understand that I may stomp all over their rights if I think it's in their best interest to do so.

Heheh! LOL!

AKS\/\/ulfe · « **Reply #40 on:** October 29, 2002, 02:11:53 PM »

I just wanna add something... in that other thread you are referring to Rip, that guy said he placed monitoring software on his kid's computer (or something like that)... that in itself is okay... so long as the kid knows about it.

Because if the kid don't know about it, that's where you cross the line from monitoring your kid's activities to spying on your kid...

it's no different than following your kid around in an unmarked minivan when the kid ain't at home.
-SW

Ripsnort · « **Reply #41 on:** October 29, 2002, 02:26:18 PM »

Why would a parent have to tell them anything? Why not just put the software on? If the kid asks, sure, tell him, and tell him why...but to say "Billy, I'm putting this on your machine so Lesbian militant sheep won't try to contact you and kill you" would just feed the normal behavior called "curiousity" in the child, would it not? Not that there is anything wrong with curiousity, its just I personally want to limit that curiousity of certain subjects while in my house until he is an adult...you might label that "sheltered"...I label it common sense.

Sandman · « **Reply #42 on:** October 29, 2002, 02:30:09 PM »

Quote

Originally posted by Ripsnort
Why would a parent have to tell them anything?

It's respectful to do so. Respect is a two way street. Can't get it if you don't give it.

Ripsnort · « **Reply #43 on:** October 29, 2002, 02:38:42 PM »

Good point Sandman.

AKS\/\/ulfe · « **Reply #44 on:** October 29, 2002, 02:40:38 PM »

Will you tap your kid's phone line?

Just in case...
-SW