Firstly, a disclaimer: This film is not aimed at self-engraciation. It's simply a toejam-luck 1 in a million furball that was caught on tape. I generally stink in AH.. which makes this all the more funny!
After seeing it a few times, an old joke comes to mind,, about the backwoods school-boy who had to give some sort of oral report, that had a "moral" to it.
After hearing the other kids' stories with morals like "Don't cry over spil't milk", "a stitch in time", etc.. Little Billy started his recitation.
"..my father was on a newly captured airfield in Okinawa in the war, and was drinking whiskey in the tower one day when the enemy attacked the field with lots-O-planes.."
".. bombs exploded everywhere and dad just shook his head disgustedly n' sat there slugging down his whiskey"
"Finally a plane strafed the tower, and busted up some Jim-Beam bottles. Dad went berserk! He ran out the tower & hopped in one of the Jap planes still on the field.."
"An enemy plane straffed the heck outta' dad, taking off, and a bullet hit his pocket flask, and all the bourbon dribbled out onto the floor. That REALLY got dad mad!"
"..in the air, he ruthlessly tracked that SOB who'd straffed him. Picked him outta' the red crowd of enemy fighters and tore him up! The last of dads tracers were lighting up the guy, and dad swung around and had chopped up another guy!.. the guy tried to hide in a smoke cloud but dad pinned the trigger down n' kicked the rudders back n' forth to spray a shotgun pattern into the smoke.. He lit up that enemy with hit-sprites like a freakn' Christmas tree! Raked 'em from wing-tip to wing-tip.."
"he spun around nearly hitting the ground and headed out to sea into the swirling mass of enemy fighters.."
"He picked out this one cocky enemy plane and headed for 'em. An incoming bomber flew by and dad tore him a new prettythang-hole ta' boot on flyby.."
"The cocky enemy spotted dad and did a beeline for the CV Ack,, which bore down on my father like a yellow waterfall.. but dad flew into 'er, and shredded that no good SOB.."
"He turn-tail, taking hits up the ying-yang, from withering CV ack.. a look in the rear view showed the odds were 1 v 21, and he cork-screwed his way back to base, with engine ablaze!"
"He stung a few other enemy on the way, and landed the smoking crate safely under the tower.. got out, and went back in to wet his whistle.."
"The End.."
Teacher says (with mouth agape):
"Billy! What possible moral could this story have??!!!"
Billy says;
"Why that's easy Mrs. Noosebaum. Mom n' I knew this for years.."
YA' BETTER NOT F&$K WITH THE OLD MAN WHEN HE'S BEEN DRINKIN'
Thus, if you put this story in mind when watching this film,, you'll just have to snicker a bit like I did.
Dad When He's Been Drinkin
