>> THE 10 TOP THINGS YOU WISH YOU COULD SAY AT WORK
>> >
>> > 1. I can see your point, but I still think you're full of toejam.
>> > 2. I have plenty of talent and vision. I just don't give a diddly.
>> > 3. How about "never"? Is "never" good for you?
>> > 4. It sounds like English, but I can't understand a word you're saying.
>> > 5. I see you've set aside this special time to humiliate yourself in
>> > public.
>> > 6. Ahhh, I see the diddly-up fairy has visited us again.
>> > 7. You are validating my inherent mistrust of strangers.
>> > 8. I'm already visualising the duct tape over your mouth.
>> > 9. Are you coming on to me or having a seizure?
>> > 10. The fact that no one understands you doesn't mean you're an artist.
>> >
>> > Useful Expressions for those HIGH STRESS days
>> >
>> > 1. Well, aren't we just a ray of diddlying sunshine?
>> > 2. Not the brightest crayon in the box now, are we?
>> > 3. Don't bother me. I'm living happily ever after.
>> > 4. Do I look like a diddlying people person?
>> > 5. This isn't an office. It's Hell with fluorescent lighting.
>> > 6. I pretend to work. They pretend to pay me.
>> > 7. You! Off my planet !!
>> > 8. Therapy is expensive, popping bubble wrap is cheap! You choose.
>> > 9. Practice random acts of intelligence & senseless acts of self
>> > control.
>> > 10. Did the aliens forget to remove your anal probe?
>> > 11. Errors have been made. Others will be blamed.
>> > 12. Let me show you how the guards used to do it.
>> > 13. And your cry-baby whiny-assed opinion would be...?
>> > 14. I'm not crazy, I've just been in a very bad mood for 30 years.
>> > 15. Sarcasm is just one more service we offer.
>> > 16. Do they ever shut up on your planet?
>> > 17. I'm just working here till a good fast-food job opens up.
>> > 18. I'm trying to imagine you with a personality.
>> > 19. A cubicle is just a padded cell without a door.
>> > 20. Stress is when you wake up screaming & you realise you haven't
>> > fallen asleep yet.
>> > 21. I can't remember if I'm the good twin or the evil one.
>> > 22. How many times do I have to flush before you go away?
>> > 23. I just want revenge. Is that so wrong?
>> > 24. I work 40 hours a week to be this poor.
>> > 25. Can I trade this job for what's behind door #2?
>> > 26. Too many freaks, not enough circuses.
>> > 27. Just smile and say "Yes, Mistress."
>> > 28. Chaos, panic, and disorder - my work here is done.
>> > 29. Earth is full. Go home.
>> > 30. Is it time for your medication or mine?
>> > 31. Aw, did I step on your poor little bitty ego?
>> > 32. I plead contemporary insanity.
>> > 33. How do I set a laser printer to stun?
>> > 34. I'm not tense, just terribly, terribly alert.
>> > 35. When I want your opinion, I'll give it to you.
------------------
Saw/SaintawBISHOP'S FINEST FLYING BRICKDCO 186th Wardogs (Falcon4 Squad)
http://www.wardogs.org/ "Firepower Mate, that is what separates the men from the boys..."