Author Topic: Caption this Foto 22SEP03 (Read 910 times)

AWMac · « **Reply #15 on:** September 22, 2003, 03:42:58 PM »

Fluffy was constipated for weeks until Jack gave her ExLax....the explosion was heard for miles.

Bonden · « **Reply #16 on:** September 22, 2003, 04:09:42 PM »

"Lucy!! You got some splainig to do"

Chairboy · « **Reply #17 on:** September 22, 2003, 04:11:36 PM »

On a positive note, the Beanie Babies collection was intact.

Tuomio · « **Reply #18 on:** September 22, 2003, 04:20:48 PM »

"Fortune cookies"

Ripsnort · « **Reply #19 on:** September 22, 2003, 04:22:38 PM »

"Low-tech Almond Roca Factory"

medicboy · « **Reply #20 on:** September 22, 2003, 04:26:38 PM »

Hey! There is nothing funney about that! I have run calls in sh^&% holes like that and I didn't get to wear a suit like that!!!!! I'm calling OSHA. It just blows me away that people can live like that.....

Furball · « **Reply #21 on:** September 22, 2003, 04:29:48 PM »

"Ben was so p!ssed having to clean up j-lo's mess he decided to play spaceman"

Ripsnort · « **Reply #22 on:** September 22, 2003, 04:33:21 PM »

Quote

Originally posted by medicboy
Hey! There is nothing funney about that! I have run calls in sh^&% holes like that and I didn't get to wear a suit like that!!!!! I'm calling OSHA. It just blows me away that people can live like that.....

You and my wife could talk!

They had this "patient" that was so fat they had to cut out the door jams in his apt. to remove him. He was on state assistance (Legally blind) and ballooned up to 450 lbs. Never showered or bathed. Had a mild heart attack. He ended up in the hospital for 2 weeks not because of the heart attack, but because of open sores he had all over his body from not bathing and sitting around.

Now picture this: 2 brand new nurses assistants standing next to my wife, basically getting their first taste on the job. They had this guy on the crash cart and wheeled him in the ER room, they begin to cut away more clothing to expose yet more mass flesh to hook up additional heart monitors when suddenly a huge cockroach comes squiggling out from beneath his clothes. One of the two nurses assistants passed out right there.

Furball · « **Reply #23 on:** September 22, 2003, 04:44:43 PM »

Quote

Originally posted by Ripsnort
You and my wife could talk!

They had this "patient" that was so fat they had to cut out the door jams in his apt. to remove him. He was on state assistance (Legally blind) and ballooned up to 450 lbs. Never showered or bathed. Had a mild heart attack. He ended up in the hospital for 2 weeks not because of the heart attack, but because of open sores he had all over his body from not bathing and sitting around.

Now picture this: 2 brand new nurses assistants standing next to my wife, basically getting their first taste on the job. They had this guy on the crash cart and wheeled him in the ER room, they begin to cut away more clothing to expose yet more mass flesh to hook up additional heart monitors when suddenly a huge cockroach comes squiggling out from beneath his clothes. One of the two nurses assistants passed out right there.

Aww... and that was the first time you and your wife met, how cute!

medicboy · « **Reply #24 on:** September 22, 2003, 04:45:25 PM »

Quote

Originally posted by Ripsnort
You and my wife could talk!

They had this "patient" that was so fat they had to cut out the door jams in his apt. to remove him. He was on state assistance (Legally blind) and ballooned up to 450 lbs. Never showered or bathed. Had a mild heart attack. He ended up in the hospital for 2 weeks not because of the heart attack, but because of open sores he had all over his body from not bathing and sitting around.

Now picture this: 2 brand new nurses assistants standing next to my wife, basically getting their first taste on the job. They had this guy on the crash cart and wheeled him in the ER room, they begin to cut away more clothing to expose yet more mass flesh to hook up additional heart monitors when suddenly a huge cockroach comes squiggling out from beneath his clothes. One of the two nurses assistants passed out right there.

ROFLMAO

Largest one I had was 589lbs, took us 2hrs and 12 guys to get her out of the house. In the er the nurses were cleaning her up and found parts of a sandwitch in the folds of skin on her abdomen. The bread was moldy and looked like it had been there about a week. Second time I had to pick her up was when she sat on her toilet and it shattered, had cuts and imbedded porcilen in her prettythang. She died 2 months later (thank GOD!) I thought she was going to be the end of me. "HEadlines read: Paramedic killed after patient falls on him." Then the picture.....

You know, I should write a book, after 10 years and a few thousand calls I have some pretty good stories.

Ripsnort · « **Reply #25 on:** September 22, 2003, 04:47:28 PM »

Oh my!

Hope she "held the Mayo"

Yep, sounds like this guy, he had watermelon growing between the layers of fat...body cheese mind you. I guess the smell was something ones nose never forgets!

(Your story reminds me of the cartoon of a big fat woman nailing a sign saying "LOST: small dog...{blah blah}" and the dog is wedged up her crack.

Octavius · « **Reply #26 on:** September 22, 2003, 04:50:30 PM »

Quote

Originally posted by medicboy
R Second time I had to pick her up was when she sat on her toilet and it shattered, had cuts and imbedded porcilen in her prettythang. She died 2 months later (thank GOD!) I thought she was going to be the end of me. "HEadlines read: Paramedic killed after patient falls on him." Then the picture.....

ROFL! i am a sick, sick man... i cant stop laughing at that.

my apologies

medicboy · « **Reply #27 on:** September 22, 2003, 04:50:45 PM »

Nope, you never forget the smell of "body cheese" or the smell of someone with a lower GI bleed, (digested blood comming out the south end).

rpm · « **Reply #28 on:** September 22, 2003, 04:51:17 PM »

Decontamination Suit - $560
Rubber Boots - $57
Respirator - PRICELESS!

Ripsnort · « **Reply #29 on:** September 22, 2003, 04:52:12 PM »

Quote

Originally posted by medicboy

You know, I should write a book, after 10 years and a few thousand calls I have some pretty good stories.

I keep telling the wife to document the stuff, and publish it when she retires (you can't give out patient info while a nurse, but *I* can!

)

Anyway, theres another pretty funny one about a guy that used WD-40 to prevent arthritis on his pet chickens legs, and blew himself up, but I'll save that for another day.(Wouldn't want Sling accusing me of trying to better your story!

)