Author Topic: Our Canadian friends...how *they* hunt  (Read 611 times)

Offline MJHerman

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Our Canadian friends...how *they* hunt
« Reply #15 on: October 17, 2003, 01:43:01 PM »
Quote
Originally posted by gofaster
Actually, that's obviously an American sitting on the US side of the border (it must be the southern side because he's wearing shorts and a sleeveless t-shirt and we all know it never gets warm enough in Canada for that sort of nonsense) and he's protecting his bootlegged Canadian hooch from Canadians creeping down the deer path to get it back.


And while he is protecting his precious CANADIAN hooch, the Canadians have moved off of the deer path, skirted around him, and marched down to D.C. to burn the White House down....again :D

Offline Bluedog

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Our Canadian friends...how *they* hunt
« Reply #16 on: October 19, 2003, 03:19:56 AM »
OK, can someone fill me in on this, its not the first I've heard aboot the Kanucks wandering down to DC and trashing the Whitehouse.
So what gives? (or gave, I take it this happened a while back)
Did the US and Canada actually have a war?  Why?  Who won?

Offline Thrawn

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Our Canadian friends...how *they* hunt
« Reply #17 on: October 19, 2003, 03:47:35 AM »
Quote
Originally posted by Bluedog
OK, can someone fill me in on this, its not the first I've heard aboot the Kanucks wandering down to DC and trashing the Whitehouse.
So what gives? (or gave, I take it this happened a while back)
Did the US and Canada actually have a war?  Why?  Who won?



Sort of.  Canada didn't exist as a nation state back then.  It was a British colony.  So the war was really between the Yanks and the Brits.  You might no it as the war of 1812.  The Americans tried the invade Canada and were more or less trounced.  But the US won a crapload of naval battles.  


During the war Washington DC was invade and the the Presidential residence was burnt.  To cover the burn marks the building was white washed, and has been since know as the "Whitehouse".

Also, at the battle of Detroit the fort there got the absolute bejeasious blown out of it.  Some guy wrote a song about it...something about bombs bursting in air...  ;)

The war had a lasting effect on Upper Canada (Ontario), and Lower Canada (Quebec) though as we successfully defended our boarders and that was a great source of pride, and they were united against a common foe.


"The War Of 1812" - by The Arrogant Worms
 
Oh, come back, proud Canadians
To before you had TV,
No hockey night in Canada,
There was no CBC (Oh, my God!).
In 1812, Madison was mad,
He was the president, you know
He thought he’d tell the British where they ought to go
He thought he’d invade Canada,
He thought that he was tough
Instead we went to Washington....
And burned down all his stuff!

And the White House burned, burned, burned,
And we’re the one’s that did it!
It burned, burned, burned,
While the president ran and cried.
It burned, burned, burned,
And things were very historical.
And the Americans ran and cried like a bunch of little babies
Waa waa waah!
In the War of 1812!

US hillbillies from Kentucky,
Dressed in green and red,
Left home to fight in Canada,
But they returned home dead
It’s the only war the Yankees lost, except for Vietnam
And also the Alamo... and the Bay of... ham.
The loser was America,
The winner was ourselves,
So join right in and gloat about the War of 1812

And the White House burned, burned, burned,
And we’re the one’s that did it!
It burned, burned, burned,
While the president ran and cried.
It burned, burned, burned,
And things were very historical.
And the Americans ran and cried like a bunch of little babies
Waa waa waah!
In the War of 1812!

In 1812, we were just sittin’ around,
Mindin’ our own business, puttin’ crops into the ground.
We heard the soldiers coming and we didn’t like that sound.
So we took a boat to Washington and burned it to the ground.

Oh... we... fired our guns, but the Yankees kept-a coming,
There wasn’t quite as many as there was a while ago.
We fired once more and the Yankees started running,
Down the Mississippi to the Gulf of Mexico, oh, oh....
They ran through the snow and they ran through the forest,
They ran through the bushes where the beavers wouldn’t go.
They ran so fast, they forgot to take their culture,
Back to America, and Gulf and Texaco

So, if you go to Washington, its buildings clean and nice,
Bring a pack of matches, and we’ll burn the White House twice!

And the White House burned, burned, burned,
But the Americans won’t admit it
It burned, burned, burned,
It burned and burned and burned
It burned, burned, burned,
Now, I bet that made them mad
And the Americans ran and cried like a bunch of little babies
Waa waa waah!
In the War of 1812!

 :D

You can find out more about the war here...

http://members.tripod.com/~war1812/
« Last Edit: October 19, 2003, 04:12:04 AM by Thrawn »

Offline Bluedog

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Our Canadian friends...how *they* hunt
« Reply #18 on: October 19, 2003, 04:03:25 AM »
Cool, thankyou Thrawn.

Offline Thrawn

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Our Canadian friends...how *they* hunt
« Reply #19 on: October 19, 2003, 04:08:38 AM »
Quote
Originally posted by Bluedog
Cool, thankyou Thrawn.


NP.  And not to give the wrong impression, we also like songs about Americans blowing the bejeasious out of Canadians. :D

Here are the lyrics to a very popular pub song by the late great Stan Rogers.  The lyrics in bold are usually shouted out by the audiance.

BARRETT'S PRIVATEERS

Oh, the year was 1778, HOW I WISH I WAS IN SHERBROOKE NOW!
A letter of marque come from the king,
To the scummiest vessel I'd ever seen,

CHORUS:
Golly-geen them all!
I was told we'd cruise the seas for American gold
We'd fire no guns-shed no tears
Now I'm a broken man on a Halifax pier
The last of Barrett's Privateers.

Oh, Elcid Barrett cried the town, HOW I WISH I WAS . . .
For twenty brave men all fishermen who
would make for him the Antelope's crew
(chorus)

The Antelope sloop was a sickening sight,
She'd a list to the port and and her sails in rags
And the cook in scuppers with the staggers and the jags
(chorus)

On the King's birthday we put to sea,
We were 91 days to Montego Bay
Pumping like madmen all the way
(chorus)

On the 96th day we sailed again,
When a bloody great Yankee hove in sight
With our cracked four pounders we made to fight
(chorus)

The Yankee lay low down with gold,
She was broad and fat and loose in the stays
But to catch her took the Antelope two whole days
(chorus)

Then at length we stood two cables away,
Our cracked four pounders made an awful din
But with one fat ball the Yank stove us in
(chorus)

The Antelope shook and pitched on her side,
Barrett was smashed like a bowl of eggs
And the Maintruck carried off both me legs
(chorus)

So here I lay in my 23rd year,
It's been 6 years since we sailed away
And I just made Halifax yesterday
(chorus)

Offline rabbidrabbit

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Our Canadian friends...how *they* hunt
« Reply #20 on: October 19, 2003, 12:08:15 PM »
Quote
Originally posted by Gadfly
Well, anyone south of the US border is a Wetback, per Rip, and that is racist, so anyone north of the border must be a Snowback, and therefore it is racist.



Might want to look up the definition of "racism" before you post Gadfly.   Perhaps you might want to try "bigoted"?

Offline Gadfly

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Our Canadian friends...how *they* hunt
« Reply #21 on: October 19, 2003, 12:23:38 PM »
It was a joke-jokes don't have to be fatually accurate.

Offline vorticon

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Our Canadian friends...how *they* hunt
« Reply #22 on: October 19, 2003, 02:22:31 PM »
Quote
Originally posted by gofaster
Actually, that's obviously an American sitting on the US side of the border (it must be the southern side because he's wearing shorts and a sleeveless t-shirt and we all know it never gets warm enough in Canada for that sort of nonsense) B]


only for you southern wimps ;)

Offline Ripper29

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Our Canadian friends...how *they* hunt
« Reply #23 on: October 19, 2003, 02:52:49 PM »
20 degrees
Texans turn on the heat and unpack the thermal underwear. People in
Canada go swimming in the Lakes.

15 degrees
North Carolinians try to turn on the heat. People in Canada plant
gardens.

10 degrees
Californians shiver uncontrollably. People in Canada sunbathe.

5 degrees
Italian & English cars won't start. People in Canada drive with the
windows down.

0 degrees
Distilled water freezes. Lake Superior's water gets thicker.

-5 degrees
Floridians don coats, thermal underwear, gloves, and woolly hats.
People in Canada throw on a flannel shirt.

-10 degrees
Philadelphia landlords finally turn up the heat. People in Canada
have the last cookout before it gets cold.

-20 degrees
People in Miami all die. Canadians lick the flagpole.

-30 degrees
Californians fly away to Mexico. People in Canada get out their
winter coats.

-40 degrees
Hollywood disintegrates. The Girl Scouts in Canada are selling
cookies door to door.

-50 degrees
Polar bears begin to evacuate the Arctic. Canadian Boy Scouts
postpone "Winter Survival" classes until it gets cold enough.

-70 degrees
Mount St. Helens freezes. People in Canada rent some videos.

- 100 degrees
Santa Claus abandons the North Pole. Canadians get frustrated because
they can't thaw the keg.

-150 degrees
Microbial life no longer survives on dairy products. Cows in Canada
complain about farmers with cold hands.

-273 degrees
ALL atomic motion stops (absolute zero in the Kelvin scale). People
in Canada start saying, "Eh, Cold 'nuff for ya?"

-500 degrees
Hell freezes over. The Toronto Maple Leafs win the Stanley Cup

.:aok