Aces High Bulletin Board
General Forums => The O' Club => Topic started by: capt. apathy on November 27, 2003, 07:28:23 PM
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put away the standard tree stand.
install a ceiling hook where the tree will go.
put the bottom of the tree in a coffee can(for water) and attach the can with a screw.
tie a string (1/8" nylon cord works best) to the tree and hang it from the hook, so that it hangs about 1/2" off the floor.
now when your kids or dogs fall into the tree, instead of tipping it over and breaking glass ornaments it just swings out of the way, and then back into position.
your average 3 year old will knock down a Christmas tree about 2-3 times a day.
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Good tip, but I really look forward to getting rid of some glass ornament crap. :)
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How long before the kid figures out he can swing on the tree? ;)
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I say electrify the tree and teach the mother****er a lesson.
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How long before the kid figures out he can swing on the tree?
not too long, :(
longer than it took for him to work past the vaseline on his bedroom doorknob, on days when I needed to sleep late.
not as long as it took to teach him not to put a slice of pizza in the vcr
btw- swinging from the tree is less mess than climbing it :D
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Originally posted by capt. apathy
not too long, :(
longer than it took for him to work past the vaseline on his bedroom doorknob, on days when I needed to sleep late.
not as long as it took to teach him not to put a slice of pizza in the vcr
btw- swinging from the tree is less mess than climbing it :D
Then you gotta go with Funked's idea - but first test on the dog to make sure it's safe. ;)
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Geeze Apathy...you already have the "Husband of the Year Award"...you going for the "Father/Head of Safety Specialist of the Year Award" now?;)
Great tip though....will follow that one FOR SURE.
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why is it the word 'funked' and 'vaseline' pop up together on this BBS all the time?
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My cousin used a waist-high wooden fence to keep kids and critters out of the tree's perimeter (and away from the packages, too).
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Originally posted by OIO
why is it the word 'funked' and 'vaseline' pop up together on this BBS all the time?
I'm very well endowed, so extra lube is needed.
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well lets see i cant do this. our roof is already so crappy that it leaks evey time it rains. (i live in very old house was built in 1917 i believe.) good tip though. btw i have better things to swing on :p
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Originally posted by B17Skull12
btw i have better things to swing on :p
Chandeliers? :rofl
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If you put the tree in a corner, you can secure the tree with twine or rope about half way up the tree. Run the twine to a hook in the corner. You can only see the twine if you look for it(you can even cover it in garland). The tree will not fall forward this way.
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....or drill holes in legs of stand, mount sleeves in floor and bolt the sucker down.
(How we did it for a Day Care ctr...)
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nah ill go swing on a tire out bye our tree and try to jump from it to my trampoline which btw is 15 feet. i broke my leg once doing it and ive got lots of sprained ankled etc. only made it like 10 times when i have tried 500 times :p
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I have this mental image of my daughter swinging on a christmas tree, and I;m sitting here, LAUGHING MY arnold OFF!!
Thanks!
BTW, where does the Angel go if theres string there?
Huh?
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BTW, where does the Angel go if theres string there?
I tie the string down low (clove hitch, for those of you, me included, who are anal about knots and always must use the right one, for the job. but if thats you, then you probably already knew which knot to use :p )
then a couple half hitches on the top just below the angel.
then the string runs up her dress and out through the collar.
this trick has saved the handmade angel that my wife made at least 5 different times. not only will the tree not fall over, but the string keeps the angel on top even if the tree takes a hard hit (like a 6 year old tackling a pitbull into your tree at a dead run)
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My cats try all the things you mention and only try it once, would a Super Soaker work with kids?
I'd pry be a bad Dad.
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I tried to sell the wife on shock/tracking collars, a channle foir each kid.
she didn't go for it.
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[list=1]NO three year olds (or younger/older til the age of 10) allowed
NO dogs/pets of any kind allowed
NO xmas tree allowed.
One metal POLE to be placed on a stand in a corner.[/list]
This is for the holy holiday of Festivus.
as mr kastanza once said "Festivus for the rest of us!!"
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Originally posted by Octavius
One metal POLE to be placed on a stand in a corner
Brilliant - then my wife can entertain the family with a nice strip-tease! She can prolly get a few bucks out of my dad too...
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Sweet.. I live for In-Laws like you.
I buy bologna only for her shank bellybutton and throw it at her head.
Swap! "Look at Daddy, whos got the money" then punch her.
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Originally posted by B17Skull12
nah ill go swing on a tire out bye our tree and try to jump from it to my trampoline which btw is 15 feet. i broke my leg once doing it and ive got lots of sprained ankled etc. only made it like 10 times when i have tried 500 times :p
Skull,
Do me a favor, and look up insanity in the dictionary. You might see a pattern.
Just a thought.
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bodhi i found no pattern. but i did manage to make it this morning.