Aces High Bulletin Board
General Forums => The O' Club => Topic started by: JB73 on January 09, 2004, 06:58:48 PM
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No cht really here's the story from yesterday:
I work for Xerox and fill in at numerous accounts when someone is on vacation, calls in sick or whatever. One of our clients is Children’s Hospital of Wisconsin. I was filling in there from Wednesday through Friday for one of the mail personnel that was on vacation. I go there regularly, and have an outstanding track record with the client. I've done a ton of “special” jobs and stuff that have not only gotten me recognition with Xerox, but with the client too (free meals, CD’s, and money to mention a few).
Sp there we are the Xerox staff right after lunch talking about dumb stuff. There are 2 other guys that work there (all Xerox) that I am pretty good buddies with. Jay and Eric. Jay goes and takes a dump every day about 45 minutes after lunch LOL. Well here we go talking about bowel movements (guys being guys I thought). Jay leaves to go to the can and I go on a mail run. While on the mail run I do some powerful “movements” in one of the bathrooms in the hospital building (BTW our room is in the office building 1 of 3-4 on the campus).
When I get back from the run I tell Jay that there was a “condition yellow” in the hospital bathroom near clinic E (the hospital has color codes for events, red for fire, black for tornado and so on). Yellow is the “bomb threat” code. I tell Jay I left either a “dirty bomb” or “chemical warhead” in the toilet. Basically I made a nasty dump LOL. Jay laughed for a minute then went back to work.
I go and tell Eric the same thing looking for another chuckle. Somehow though he missed the fact the I left a “steamer” and just heard the “code yellow”. Well I didn’t know he missed that part, and since he was a bit busy I just went back to work.
About 5-10 minutes later Eric is on the phone with someone and says across the room:
“hey Dave, where was it that the “condition yellow” was reported?”
I was mortified and Jay almost fell over laughing. Eric was on the phone with the director of material services who works in an offsite building. Seems it’s our job in the mailroom to report any “codes” to the outside building so they know what’s going on. These codes are announced over the PA of the hospital followed by a long beep to alert everyone. Since this didn’t happen (because there WAS NO BOMB THREAT) we couldn’t figure out why the **** he had made the call.
Anyway as Jay is falling over laughing I say to Eric, “what?!?! Didn’t you hear me, I was talking about a ****!” at which point he gets this very upset look on hi face and tells the director “I'm sorry David Ray was making a practical joke” and gets off the phone with him!
Now Eric is pissed for looking like a fool and the director is extremely pissed seeing as they initiated a shutdown of operations for the “bomb threat”.
Now I'm concerned. The director of material services thinks I was making a practical joke bomb threat on Children’s Hospital. Not cool. I wasn’t even CLOSE to making a threat to the hospital, unless you count the noxious fumes in the restroom on the 2nd floor.
Within a half hour I have been on the phone with the manager of the account, my manager, and numerous others explaining the situation, delicately I might add.
Here’s where I'm pissed off. Eric does not have a body. The only thing you see of him is his feet sticking out of his managers prettythang. He was such a busy-body moron he made a call to start a shutdown knowing NOTHING about the situation.
Not only that, if there really was a bomb threat you think I would just tell him in passing, casually, then just go back to my job?!?! I’d be the frikin roadrunner. All you'd see of me was a dust trail away from that building.
Well I still have a job, Children’s decided against pressing charges but I'm never allowed on campus again, and I'm on “corrective action” with Xerox (meaning if I screw up again in the next 6 months I get canned).
Eric got commended for acting swiftly on a possible hazard, and making the correct call.
WTF is wrong with these people?!?!?!?!
Warning to everyone: don’t make a joke about “dropping a bomb” in the toilet at work, you might get fired.
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:( :rofl
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:rofl :lol laughing with and more so At you LOL
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I'd change jobs now, before that guy becomes your boss.:(
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Do it in an airport, and you get a free cavity search and a wonderful all expense paid trip to the Police station. Stills sucks, though, dude.
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OMG JB. Sorry to hear about your "BOMB DROPPING" storry. I can see both sides of the story really but I'm sorry you were on the end that you were on. Its amaizing how certain chain of events can lead to total disaster from innocent fun. Maybe an official appology letter to the hospital explaining how you'd never think of joking around about somthing like that yada yada yada would help. Good luck
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Originally posted by Gunslinger
OMG JB. Sorry to hear about your "BOMB DROPPING" storry. I can see both sides of the story really but I'm sorry you were on the end that you were on. Its amaizing how certain chain of events can lead to total disaster from innocent fun. Maybe an official appology letter to the hospital explaining how you'd never think of joking around about somthing like that yada yada yada would help. Good luck
ty but the funny thing is it had nothing to do with the hospital... it was caught in time.
see since im a contractor there i am subject to the person who signs the service contract... the director of material services.
he says jump Xerox says how high?
im actually buddy buddy with the director of security @ CHW (Childrens Hosp. Wisc.). me and the guy Jay I mentioned above have lunch with him at least once a week when i'm there. when i told him what happened he laughed his butt off (but did acknowledge the seriousness of the acusation).
he had not heard a thing... the director of mat serv. never did get to the point of calling security... just shut down his part of the off-site operation.
so anyway he says go away Xerox says im gone.
my manager (different from the CHW manager) said he hopes Eric gets in trouble.. though i think bill clinton has a better chance of being nominated for "morals of the century" award than his holiness Eric the man of action has of getting even scolded.
oh well.
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I understand your pain.
I got a verbal waring once because my partner on the ambulance took offense to me Farting in the ambulance and refusing to roll down the window.
I did It just to piss him off I was hoping to get a new partner and I did LOL.;)
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Originally posted by JB73
No cht really here's the story from yesterday:
I work for Xerox and fill in at numerous accounts when someone is on vacation, calls in sick or whatever. One of our clients is Children’s Hospital of Wisconsin. I was filling in there from Wednesday through Friday for one of the mail personnel that was on vacation. I go there regularly, and have an outstanding track record with the client. I've done a ton of “special” jobs and stuff that have not only gotten me recognition with Xerox, but with the client too (free meals, CD’s, and money to mention a few).
Sp there we are the Xerox staff right after lunch talking about dumb stuff. There are 2 other guys that work there (all Xerox) that I am pretty good buddies with. Jay and Eric. Jay goes and takes a dump every day about 45 minutes after lunch LOL. Well here we go talking about bowel movements (guys being guys I thought). Jay leaves to go to the can and I go on a mail run. While on the mail run I do some powerful “movements” in one of the bathrooms in the hospital building (BTW our room is in the office building 1 of 3-4 on the campus).
When I get back from the run I tell Jay that there was a “condition yellow” in the hospital bathroom near clinic E (the hospital has color codes for events, red for fire, black for tornado and so on). Yellow is the “bomb threat” code. I tell Jay I left either a “dirty bomb” or “chemical warhead” in the toilet. Basically I made a nasty dump LOL. Jay laughed for a minute then went back to work.
I go and tell Eric the same thing looking for another chuckle. Somehow though he missed the fact the I left a “steamer” and just heard the “code yellow”. Well I didn’t know he missed that part, and since he was a bit busy I just went back to work.
About 5-10 minutes later Eric is on the phone with someone and says across the room:
“hey Dave, where was it that the “condition yellow” was reported?”
I was mortified and Jay almost fell over laughing. Eric was on the phone with the director of material services who works in an offsite building. Seems it’s our job in the mailroom to report any “codes” to the outside building so they know what’s going on. These codes are announced over the PA of the hospital followed by a long beep to alert everyone. Since this didn’t happen (because there WAS NO BOMB THREAT) we couldn’t figure out why the **** he had made the call.
Anyway as Jay is falling over laughing I say to Eric, “what?!?! Didn’t you hear me, I was talking about a ****!” at which point he gets this very upset look on hi face and tells the director “I'm sorry David Ray was making a practical joke” and gets off the phone with him!
Now Eric is for looking like a fool and the director is extremely seeing as they initiated a shutdown of operations for the “bomb threat”.
Now I'm concerned. The director of material services thinks I was making a practical joke bomb threat on Children’s Hospital. Not cool. I wasn’t even CLOSE to making a threat to the hospital, unless you count the noxious fumes in the restroom on the 2nd floor.
Within a half hour I have been on the phone with the manager of the account, my manager, and numerous others explaining the situation, delicately I might add.
Here’s where I'm off. Eric does not have a body. The only thing you see of him is his feet sticking out of his managers prettythang. He was such a busy-body moron he made a call to start a shutdown knowing NOTHING about the situation.
Not only that, if there really was a bomb threat you think I would just tell him in passing, casually, then just go back to my job?!?! I’d be the frikin roadrunner. All you'd see of me was a dust trail away from that building.
Well I still have a job, Children’s decided against pressing charges but I'm never allowed on campus again, and I'm on “corrective action” with Xerox (meaning if I screw up again in the next 6 months I get canned).
Eric got commended for acting swiftly on a possible hazard, and making the correct call.
WTF is wrong with these people?!?!?!?!
Warning to everyone: don’t make a joke about “dropping a bomb” in the toilet at work, you might get fired.
Thats todays society I suppose, people are afraid of their own freakin shadows, but I have my own story.
Two years ago on Christmas 23rd, I got a package in the mail. It was steaks from my sister, and they packaged it in dry ice to keep it frozen. So I put the dry ice in two "2 liter bottles" and a 24 ounce bottle. I chunk them in the backyard and wait.
An hour later, KABBBOOOOOOOOOM, sounds like a 12 gauge shotgun on steriods went off, then 30 minutes after that, the other 2 liter bottle went off, nearly breaking all the windows in our neighborhood. My backdoor neighbor is on his porch with a telephone talking to the police, and binoculars looking out probably to see if he could see a guy running around with a shotgun and a turban around his head:lol
Anyway, we had about 3 cop cars circling around our neighborhood, and 5 neighbors calling us to see if we knew anything. We were lucky ofcourse that the 24 ounce bottle didn't go off while a cop was going around our circle.
The next morning, I woke up at 5:00 AM to pick up the bottles in our backyard, and we had plastic just about everywhere, it wasn't just a rip in the bottle, it disentegrated.
You probably can't beat that redneck story :rofl:
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How much dry ice in the bottles?
Do tell.. be fun to do..
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JB,
I read the post and I understand where you are coming from. The other thing that was going through my mind was that old warning about never joking about hijack or bombs on or near an airliner airport. Some folks won't understand you are joking and will take you seriously. Same for yelling fire in a theater I suppose.
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How's that Homeland Security workin for ya, now?
Why are'nt you at Gitmo?
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If you'd had a little more time to think you might have told Eric that you didn't say code yellow but that you had some cold jello while he was on the phone with the director. ;)
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lol ahh man thats funny, sucks bout that Eric guy, alil common
sense and he woulda knew what was goin on, how many people just walk by, ooo yea uh code yellow saw a uh bomb in the toilet.... have good day, specially someone you work with and know alil about.
And bout that dry ice, you can take liquid laundry soap, (blue kind
or whatever) put that in a 2 liter somewhat less than half full
and make some tin foil clumps or balls from that tin foil wrapping
you use for foods, put them in the 2 liter and put the cap on,
shake it all together and wait bout 5 mins and you get a big arse
boom bout like that dry ice. One time my buddy told me about that
and we decided to try it out, got it all set up and im thinking a nice
fast explosion like maybe 1-2 mins, so were waiten there and
after bout 4mins or so i told him to walk up there and check it out
lol he gets half way there and all sudden we see this white
smoke swirling around in there, he says OH CHIT!, and turns and
runs bout that time BOOOM! good cheap fun:D
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how many clumps? :D
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Originally posted by Hawklore
How much dry ice in the bottles?
Do tell.. be fun to do..
Not alot, just a few pellets, about 5, put in some hot water, then it really starts to expands.
I wouldn't try it in any neighborhood nowadays, you could be arrested and sent to jail for a few years for - (happens alot on college campuses)
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Another interesting 'dont try this at home'. I work in a soft drink plant, repairing and maintaining the machinery. We just installed a bottled water line in the plant. Inorder to get the bottles 'hard' for consumer appeal and logistics, we put a small dose of nitrogen in each bottle just after it is filled. I, being a former watcher of mr wizard, wondered what would happen if I filled a bottle up with nitrogen. Just at the right moment, i stopped the filler and jogged and put an emtpty bottle under the nitrogen doser and manually forced about 2 inches of nitrogen into the bottle. Starte up the systme to allow the bottle to be capped so i could check out my experiment. About 20 feet down the line is a reject system that verifys any bottle is filled tot he correct level. If it isnt, it gets rejected into a reject bin. I noticed a supervisor looking into the reject bin to see how many rejects we were getting this day so I thought I better go get my experiment before I got into trouble for screwing off. Just I looked to see where it was, I noticed it had grown incredibly large, barley squeezing its way thru the conveyor. I decided it was too dangerous to try to get it so I couldnt do anything but watch.
To my horror, the red 'reject' light lit up on the detector and the
rejector fired the bottle right into the bin. it was a 1 litre bottle. it had grown to the size of a football. The 'experiment' sat right infront of the supervisor who was astonished at what it was. Just before he reached in to inspect it further .KABOOOOOOOMMMM!!!!!!! it blew the entire contents of the bin in all directions. Luckily, nobody was seriously hurt, but, what i did learn from all this is that gas nitrogen takes up 700 times the volume of the liquid it boiled from and this could be dangerous.:eek:
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Originally posted by AKIron
If you'd had a little more time to think you might have told Eric that you didn't say code yellow but that you had some cold jello while he was on the phone with the director. ;)
:cool:
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Poor poor JB. That Eric guy reminds me of someone I know...
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I hope JB73 gets fired. What kind of a dipstick uses a public toilet to take a dump in?
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Originally posted by Airhead
I hope JB73 gets fired. What kind of a dipstick uses a public toilet to take a dump in?
The code yellow was probably for the chemicals they had to use to free him from it.... :cool: