Aces High Bulletin Board

General Forums => The O' Club => Topic started by: beet1e on March 22, 2004, 09:03:28 AM

Title: TexAS 2-step
Post by: beet1e on March 22, 2004, 09:03:28 AM

Would you believe it! Some folks have accused me of “dancing” on this board! The general pattern is for my accusers to seize upon a comment that I made in passing, which does NOT form part of the discussion at hand, and when I point this out in an effort to keep the thread on topic, I’m accused of avoiding the “point” and/or “dancing”! :lol

So be it. Slapshot mentioned a dance I hadn’t heard of. He called it the Texas two-step. So I’ve tried to put a tune together, and some words.

Imagine the scene – it’s a Texas style hoe-down. All the guys are drinking beer from long neck bottles. The girls are… well, they look lovely. ;) Slapshot is the dancemaster and calls the steps. In the band, we have two violins, banjo, twin-neck steel guitar, drums… Take it away, Slapshot!






It’s two to the left and two to the right
It’s the Texas two-step, we can dance all night!
Swing your partner, give her a twirl
Don’t be bashful, swing that girl!    

Now our friend Toad doesn’t fly very high
And the way he flies he’s sure to die!
Used to fly a Jug a long time before,
When his PC was a Commodore!

Now Toad’s not alone and the support he has
Comes mainly from a guy called Lazs,
Who’s big and bad and looks quite mean
And has the biggest gun I’ve ever seen!

Lazs hates the strat and loves to fight
So he loves the day and hates the night.
But his old plane comes from the ark
And when his k/h drops he blames the dark!

Now dos à dos that’s back to back
But careful now, watch out for attack!
If your partner’s Toad better check your six
‘cos old Mr. Toad he’s full of tricks!

Oh! Furball to the left and strat to the right
It’s the Texas two-step, we can dance all night!
Swing your partner, give her a twirl
Swing your partner, swing that girl!    

Now our friend Rude is a furball dude
More dead than alive in his Spit five
When he bounced two cons and his chances were blown
Said ”It wasn’t my fault – I was on the phone!”

 Yee-harr! Nice footwork, Rude!



Now our friend Steve flies EasyMode
So he’s no friend of Lazs or Toad
He say’s this and that and the other SUX
So his whole game’s in a state of flux!

In his EasyStang he racks up kills
Won’t send me films, but I’ve seen the stills!
In his Easystang he’s sure to shine
But he can’t do it in a 109!

Oh! Furball to the left and strat to the right
It’s the Texas two-step, we can dance all night!
Swing your partner, give her a twirl
Don’t be bashful, swing that girl!    

<-- music slows down on last line of song

Title: TexAS 2-step
Post by: lazs2 on March 22, 2004, 02:41:15 PM

It's not polite to stare at another mans gun.

lazs

Title: TexAS 2-step
Post by: GtoRA2 on March 22, 2004, 02:43:44 PM

OMG this is more gay then the island thread....


Jeez you brits should find this guy and put a muzzle on him.... he is making you all look like poofs!!:D

Title: TexAS 2-step
Post by: Maniac on March 22, 2004, 02:50:11 PM

I djust put him on ignore...

Title: TexAS 2-step
Post by: Octavius on March 22, 2004, 03:03:02 PM

how much time did you spend writing this post?  My god :)

Title: TexAS 2-step
Post by: NUKE on March 22, 2004, 03:14:49 PM

I thought that was pretty good myself.

Title: TexAS 2-step
Post by: Steve on March 22, 2004, 03:28:45 PM

Now THIS is good stuff.  Why put him on ignore?  His lyrics are damned funny.  

Good one Beet.

:lol

Title: TexAS 2-step
Post by: Crapgame on March 22, 2004, 03:46:29 PM

Hmmm.....That is kinda brunser like. Not for the lyrics, but no one in any respectable roadhouse, honky-tonk or dancehall would call it a violin....sheesh, everyone knows they're fiddles.

Title: TexAS 2-step
Post by: rpm on March 22, 2004, 04:05:00 PM

Sounds like he has a future with
(http://www.bravotv.com/images/Queer_Eye_for_the_Straight_Guy/Photos/group10.jpg)
except he doesn't know a 2 Step from a Square dance.

Title: Re: TexAS 2-step
Post by: tomato on March 22, 2004, 04:45:20 PM

Quote

Originally posted by beet1e
Imagine the scene – it’s a Texas style hoe-down.
… Take it away, Slapshot!

It’s two to the left and two to the right ...

:rofl
Sheer music, Dr K.  You are a dark horse.  ;)

Title: TexAS 2-step
Post by: Wolfala on March 22, 2004, 08:50:41 PM

You are a true american.

Title: TexAS 2-step
Post by: beet1e on March 23, 2004, 05:27:57 AM

Quote

Originally posted by Octavius
how much time did you spend writing this post?  My god :)

ROFL!  Not very long. The words sort of came to me during a sleepless night (I have a mild chest infection this week), and it took about 10-15 minutes to type it in.

I once did a song like this for a P51 dweeb in WB. Well he wasn't a dweeb, he was good. The song was about him getting his kills while his side lost field after field. ;)

I was going to do a song for Toad - based on "My Way" by Frank Sinatra, because that's how he wants everyone to fly! But I couldn't work the metering. The only part I liked was...

Returns to Base,
I've had a few,
But then again...
Too few to mention... - as you can see, the metering sux.

But I was thinking of doing a song for Steve on the theme of night having been withdrawn from the MA. I would use the Nik Kershaw song "I won't let the sun go down on you" :lol

Title: TexAS 2-step
Post by: Mark Luper on March 23, 2004, 08:10:35 AM

Those were "cute" lyrics Beet but a "two-step" is not a square dance.

Title: TexAS 2-step
Post by: lazs2 on March 23, 2004, 08:36:06 AM

don't you have to have a chest to have a chest infection?

lazs

Title: TexAS 2-step
Post by: beet1e on March 23, 2004, 08:48:10 AM

Quote

Originally posted by Mark Luper
Those were "cute" lyrics Beet but a "two-step" is not a square dance.

Yeah I know. I don't know much about dancing!