Aces High Bulletin Board

General Forums => The O' Club => Topic started by: Lazerus on March 30, 2004, 10:34:35 PM

Title: The Comfort Level
Post by: Lazerus on March 30, 2004, 10:34:35 PM
WARNING: CUT AND PASTE

Quote
Well, I suppose it had to happen. After eleven years of teaching at a public university, I finally got a call from one of my superiors informing me that I had made one of my co-workers feel “uncomfortable” in the workplace.  For those who may not know, the right to feel “comfortable” at all times trumps the First Amendment at most public universities.

Naturally, when I found out that I made a co-worker feel “uncomfortable,” I wanted to know what I had said or done to produce such an unthinkable result. That was when I learned that the “discomfort” occurred because I had been discussing some of my weekly columns here in the workplace (i.e., at the public university).  The penalty for that transgression was simple: a ban on discussing my columns in the office in front of those who might be offended by my opinions. This was accompanied by the shocking revelation that “not everyone sees things the way you do, Mike.”

When it first hit me that while in the office I could no longer talk about gay rights, feminism, religion, Darwinism, affirmative action, or any issue I discuss in my column, I was outraged. In fact, I got so mad that I raised my voice before storming out of my superior’s office. I never thought that the right of each university employee to feel comfortable at all times would ever actually be enforced against me here in the workplace (a.k.a., the public university).

But after I thought about it for a while, my anger turned to elation. Surely, the power to trump the First Amendment rights of others in response to “discomfort” is available to all employees, not just a select few. Since that must be the case (because our public university is committed to equality), I decided to make a list of every situation I had encountered at UNC-Wilmington where I felt “uncomfortable.”

Armed with such a list, university administrators can now identify and silence the responsible parties, and I can enjoy the right to life, liberty, and the pursuit of unmitigated comfort. The following list isn’t yet complete, but I thought that I would share some highlights since I’m not allowed to talk to anyone in the office (here at the public university) about these issues:

*My first year at UNCW, a faculty member in our department objected to a job candidate because he was “a little too white male.” Such comments make me feel really uncomfortable, being a white guy and all that.

*My second year at UNCW we removed a white woman from our interview pool in order to make room for a black woman. When the university forced me to discriminate on the basis of race, I felt really uncomfortable.

*My third year at UNCW someone suggested that we should reject a job candidate because he was “too religious.” It sure makes me feel uncomfortable when people say things like that.

*My fourth year at UNCW someone objected to a job candidate because she felt that the husband played too dominant a role in the candidate’s marriage. It also makes me feel uncomfortable when people say things like that.

*Then there are all the times that the name Jesus Christ has been used as a form of profanity in the office. That makes me feel uncomfortable. By the way, I am especially offended by the phrase “Jesus F***ing Christ!” I mean, no one ever says “Mo-F***ing-Hammed!” or “F***ing Buddha!,” do they?

*Then there was the time that a gay activist in our department suggested that I switch to bi-sexuality in order to double my chances of finding a suitable “partner.” That made me feel uncomfortable and she knew it. After I started to blush, she asked, “What’s the matter, are you a little homophobic?” So what if I don’t think you can change your sexual orientation as easily as your underwear? Is that so wrong? Do I really have a phobia?

*And how about the time that a faculty member called another faculty member a “mother f***er” in one of our meetings? That was before he said that he should have climbed over the desk and “slapped the s*** out of him.” These sociologists need to start getting along with one another if they plan to build a Utopian society. Plus, it makes me feel really uncomfortable to hear about these threats of violence in the workplace.

*Then there’s the professor in our department who thinks that I am trying to poison her with tear gas. A few years ago the police questioned me about breaking into her office and spraying chemicals. That was a pretty uncomfortable situation. I think it even qualifies as a Maalox moment. By the way, how long do I have to work with this woman? She makes me feel very uncomfortable.

*And then there was the time that the university attorney read two of my personal e-mails against my objections. Do you have any idea how uncomfortable that made me feel? That’s a long story that you can read about in my new book, which I am not trying shamelessly to promote. I know that capitalism makes a lot of my colleagues feel uncomfortable.

*A member of the UNCW Board of Trustees has been heard calling people “white trash” and making other racist statements in public. She has to vote on my next promotion as well as the promotion of every other professor at the university. That makes me feel a little uncomfortable, still being a white guy and all that. Maybe my race makes her feel uncomfortable, but some of us can’t afford to change the color of our skin. We can’t all be like Michael Jackson. I know that makes a lot of parents feel comfortable.

Well, that covers the first ten items on my list. I have over two hundred more to go but I’m getting a crick in my neck from writing all of this down. It’s only 10:51 a.m. (EST) but I think I’ll call it a day. I can’t work unless I feel perfectly comfortable, both physically and emotionally at all times.

I’ll be back in the morning. In the meantime, the university needs to start rounding up all of the people who are interfering with my life, liberty, and pursuit of absolute comfort. I hope that no one will feel uncomfortable when they are reprimanded for making me feel uncomfortable.

I know that if everyone follows my lead, free speech will die here at our local university. But at least everyone will feel comfortable at all times. I guess that’s all that really matters.
Quote
Well, I suppose it had to happen. After eleven years of teaching at a public university, I finally got a call from one of my superiors informing me that I had made one of my co-workers feel “uncomfortable” in the workplace.  For those who may not know, the right to feel “comfortable” at all times trumps the First Amendment at most public universities.

Naturally, when I found out that I made a co-worker feel “uncomfortable,” I wanted to know what I had said or done to produce such an unthinkable result. That was when I learned that the “discomfort” occurred because I had been discussing some of my weekly columns here in the workplace (i.e., at the public university).  The penalty for that transgression was simple: a ban on discussing my columns in the office in front of those who might be offended by my opinions. This was accompanied by the shocking revelation that “not everyone sees things the way you do, Mike.”

When it first hit me that while in the office I could no longer talk about gay rights, feminism, religion, Darwinism, affirmative action, or any issue I discuss in my column, I was outraged. In fact, I got so mad that I raised my voice before storming out of my superior’s office. I never thought that the right of each university employee to feel comfortable at all times would ever actually be enforced against me here in the workplace (a.k.a., the public university).

But after I thought about it for a while, my anger turned to elation. Surely, the power to trump the First Amendment rights of others in response to “discomfort” is available to all employees, not just a select few. Since that must be the case (because our public university is committed to equality), I decided to make a list of every situation I had encountered at UNC-Wilmington where I felt “uncomfortable.”

Armed with such a list, university administrators can now identify and silence the responsible parties, and I can enjoy the right to life, liberty, and the pursuit of unmitigated comfort. The following list isn’t yet complete, but I thought that I would share some highlights since I’m not allowed to talk to anyone in the office (here at the public university) about these issues:

*My first year at UNCW, a faculty member in our department objected to a job candidate because he was “a little too white male.” Such comments make me feel really uncomfortable, being a white guy and all that.

*My second year at UNCW we removed a white woman from our interview pool in order to make room for a black woman. When the university forced me to discriminate on the basis of race, I felt really uncomfortable.

*My third year at UNCW someone suggested that we should reject a job candidate because he was “too religious.” It sure makes me feel uncomfortable when people say things like that.

*My fourth year at UNCW someone objected to a job candidate because she felt that the husband played too dominant a role in the candidate’s marriage. It also makes me feel uncomfortable when people say things like that.

*Then there are all the times that the name Jesus Christ has been used as a form of profanity in the office. That makes me feel uncomfortable. By the way, I am especially offended by the phrase “Jesus F***ing Christ!” I mean, no one ever says “Mo-F***ing-Hammed!” or “F***ing Buddha!,” do they?




Title: The Comfort Level
Post by: Lazerus on March 30, 2004, 10:36:52 PM
"*Then there was the time that a gay activist in our department suggested that I switch to bi-sexuality in order to double my chances of finding a suitable “partner.” That made me feel uncomfortable and she knew it. After I started to blush, she asked, “What’s the matter, are you a little homophobic?” So what if I don’t think you can change your sexual orientation as easily as your underwear? Is that so wrong? Do I really have a phobia?

*And how about the time that a faculty member called another faculty member a “mother f***er” in one of our meetings? That was before he said that he should have climbed over the desk and “slapped the s*** out of him.” These sociologists need to start getting along with one another if they plan to build a Utopian society. Plus, it makes me feel really uncomfortable to hear about these threats of violence in the workplace.

*Then there’s the professor in our department who thinks that I am trying to poison her with tear gas. A few years ago the police questioned me about breaking into her office and spraying chemicals. That was a pretty uncomfortable situation. I think it even qualifies as a Maalox moment. By the way, how long do I have to work with this woman? She makes me feel very uncomfortable.

*And then there was the time that the university attorney read two of my personal e-mails against my objections. Do you have any idea how uncomfortable that made me feel? That’s a long story that you can read about in my new book, which I am not trying shamelessly to promote. I know that capitalism makes a lot of my colleagues feel uncomfortable.

*A member of the UNCW Board of Trustees has been heard calling people “white trash” and making other racist statements in public. She has to vote on my next promotion as well as the promotion of every other professor at the university. That makes me feel a little uncomfortable, still being a white guy and all that. Maybe my race makes her feel uncomfortable, but some of us can’t afford to change the color of our skin. We can’t all be like Michael Jackson. I know that makes a lot of parents feel comfortable.

Well, that covers the first ten items on my list. I have over two hundred more to go but I’m getting a crick in my neck from writing all of this down. It’s only 10:51 a.m. (EST) but I think I’ll call it a day. I can’t work unless I feel perfectly comfortable, both physically and emotionally at all times.

I’ll be back in the morning. In the meantime, the university needs to start rounding up all of the people who are interfering with my life, liberty, and pursuit of absolute comfort. I hope that no one will feel uncomfortable when they are reprimanded for making me feel uncomfortable.

I know that if everyone follows my lead, free speech will die here at our local university. But at least everyone will feel comfortable at all times. I guess that’s all that really matters."

OK, so it's a long one.....here's the link (http://www.townhall.com/columnists/mikeadams/ma20040329.shtml)
Title: The Comfort Level
Post by: FUNKED1 on March 30, 2004, 10:42:44 PM
Thanks man, awesome rant.
Title: The Comfort Level
Post by: Lazerus on March 30, 2004, 10:44:36 PM
I thought it was a rave...........




guess ya can't have both..
Title: The Comfort Level
Post by: FUNKED1 on March 30, 2004, 10:45:01 PM
PS I am going to make a a conscious effort to say “Mo-F***ing-Hammed!” instead of “Jesus F***ing Christ!”
Title: The Comfort Level
Post by: Lazerus on March 30, 2004, 10:51:41 PM
Me Too!!!!!!!!!!!

mother ****ing mohammed ****ing piece of ****!





Thats good for practice:D
Title: The Comfort Level
Post by: Tarmac on March 30, 2004, 10:57:27 PM
Quote
Originally posted by FUNKED1
PS I am going to make a a conscious effort to say “Mo-F***ing-Hammed!” instead of “Jesus F***ing Christ!”


:D
Title: The Comfort Level
Post by: Sandman on March 30, 2004, 11:47:41 PM
Read it Laz... double pasting won't help your post count. :)


That said... it's perfect. :)
Title: The Comfort Level
Post by: Lazerus on March 30, 2004, 11:51:00 PM
???, didn't think I copied it over in the second post.


Read it again, still don't think I did.......................... ............................. ............................. .


but I don't usually post unless I'm too drunk to fly so...........:D

OK, so ya beat me on the edit, but I still don't see it.    

Again, I did work 12 hours (yes, some people in this country do still have jobs) and stopped at the local watering hole. Anything is possible:D
Title: The Comfort Level
Post by: Sandman on March 30, 2004, 11:52:26 PM
the beginning of the second paste is red

Quote

I know that if everyone follows my lead, free speech will die here at our local university. But at least everyone will feel comfortable at all times. I guess that’s all that really matters.
Quote
Well, I suppose it had to happen. After eleven years of teaching at a public university, I finally got a call from one of my superiors informing me that I had made one of my co-workers feel “uncomfortable” in the workplace. For those who may not know, the right to feel “comfortable” at all times trumps the First Amendment at most public universities.
[/color]
Title: The Comfort Level
Post by: Lazerus on March 30, 2004, 11:56:03 PM
My head hurts.....:D
Title: The Comfort Level
Post by: Sandman on March 30, 2004, 11:58:12 PM
First post... paragraph 18. :D
Title: The Comfort Level
Post by: Lazerus on March 31, 2004, 12:08:13 AM
OK, OK, I finally got it









my cats breath smells like cat ****:D
Title: The Comfort Level
Post by: Gunslinger on March 31, 2004, 12:12:30 AM
I was blown away by a libral that once said "I don't think we could have a free society without somone being offended or uncomfortable"

Good post...the guy will probably lose his job...didnt have time to follow the link
Title: The Comfort Level
Post by: capt. apathy on March 31, 2004, 12:12:38 AM
n/m  I became outraged and responded before I read your whole post.

turns out twards the bottom of the 1st post you came to the same conclusions I did.
Title: The Comfort Level
Post by: Sandman on March 31, 2004, 12:19:07 AM
Quote
Originally posted by capt. apathy
it's the only way I can think of to get the point accross to these morons that "if you aren't pissing someone off with your statement, that it probably is irelivant and not worth saying"


Bingo (http://usinfo.state.gov/usa/infousa/facts/democrac/14.htm).
Title: The Comfort Level
Post by: Lazerus on March 31, 2004, 12:27:24 AM
Another nice link, ya hijacker:p



I think I'm off to bed. Just gotta get that stinkin cat outside first:D
Title: The Comfort Level
Post by: lazs2 on March 31, 2004, 08:37:24 AM
I have never had much trouble pissing people off...  people are soooo sensitive.

lazs
Title: The Comfort Level
Post by: Maverick on March 31, 2004, 09:54:03 AM
This guy is spot on. The UofA library where my wife works is a classic example of this guy's observations. They hired a former civilian employee of the Army Reserve to do IT work and maintain the computer systems in the library. He got more done in 2 months than his predecessor did in a year. The librarians and most of the staff petitioned to have him released prior to his probationary employment period because he was "too military".

Those folks are some of the most predjudiced people I have ever met and they all think they are wonderful being so liberal and all. :rolleyes:
Title: The Comfort Level
Post by: mosgood on March 31, 2004, 10:06:00 AM
I would suggest you start looking for another job if you give that list to your superiors.  Doesn't matter if it's illegal to fire you over it or not... they WILL put you on the problem person list and get rid of you as soon as they figure out how.  

Also,  I suspect that the person that complained about you is on that list already.
Title: The Comfort Level
Post by: Maverick on March 31, 2004, 10:13:09 AM
If the complainer was on the list they wouldn't have called in the author to chastize him. I doubt VERY seriously that the complainer will be given ANYTHING but extreme white glove handling lest she become "uncomfortable" again.

Think about it, what is the defense to sexual harrassment and how do you prove it?
Title: The Comfort Level
Post by: bpti on March 31, 2004, 10:15:54 AM
lazerus, if you stop exposing yourself to your coworkers, nobody will have any complaints. :D
Title: The Comfort Level
Post by: GtoRA2 on March 31, 2004, 10:21:24 AM
Pretty interesting..

****ing PC bull****...

lol

I may have to grab the book.
Title: The Comfort Level
Post by: mosgood on March 31, 2004, 10:22:24 AM
Calling the author in was PART of the white glove treatment.

I seriously doubt that they want the complainer around BECAUSE of the WHITE GLOVE handling they need to give them.  If they can legaly justify getting rid of the complainer with any excuse, they will.
Title: The Comfort Level
Post by: lazs2 on March 31, 2004, 11:59:32 AM
liberals love to restrict free speach until it is their ox that is being gored.   They love big government untill the other party is in power.   they love restricting peoples rights until it is a right they approve of that is being restricted.   Like good little socialists they believe that the end justifies the means but have no idea if the "end" is even worth having.

lazs
Title: The Comfort Level
Post by: capt. apathy on March 31, 2004, 12:28:08 PM
you know I got to thinking about something one of the older guys at work told me a few years ago.   I liked it so much it made it to the hard-hat (in sticker form), only the best ones  make it there.  
it goes like this.

I'm a sensitive guy, I can sense that I'm offending you.
I'm just not caring, because while I can sense you're offended,
I just dont give a rats-prettythang
Title: The Comfort Level
Post by: Charon on March 31, 2004, 12:43:10 PM
A buddy of mine who works for a county government in Michigan just got reprimanded for a "Sexual harrassment" complaint. One of the contractors working in the department (he's a coder) complained because the day before Halloween she dyed her hair jet black, and he made an off hand remark to her (not being mean, an honest remark): "Did you dye you hair for Halloween..." which offended her. If that wasn't enough, another contractor who had been a "friend" of my buddy for over two years told her that my friend  said afterwards: "She reminds me of an old girlfriend I once had, who I hate..."

This made her feel uncomfortable (which is not uncommon since several others have "harassed" her similarly in the past). Although her case was too week for any formal actions, he was taken off her projects as a result. It seems the county can define sexual harassment as "anything that makes someone feel uncomfortable.” What a bunch of BS.

I think SpaceMoose says it best: "Your rights end where my feelings begin..."


(http://home.comcast.net/~keithreid/polisci.gif)

Charon

Some more good spacemoose here (R rated warning):http://www.drunkanddisorderly.net/spacemoose/archive.htm
Title: The Comfort Level
Post by: WilldCrd on March 31, 2004, 01:08:01 PM
This is making me feel uncomfortable....can I have a hug?