Aces High Bulletin Board
General Forums => The O' Club => Topic started by: muckmaw on May 13, 2004, 12:03:20 PM
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Alright, troops..
Here's the deal.
Open warfare has been declared between myself and another broker in the office.
I need ideas, links, anything you can give me to the more devious, yet creative and funny pranks and practical jokes as well as put downs that this board can come up with.
I know some of you guys...you know who you are...really excel at this sort of thing.
E-mail tricks are great.
Thanks in advance
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Shoot him.
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The sweary geezer (http://www.swearygeezer.co.uk/) will help you!
Ravs
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Originally posted by ra
Shoot him.
Done...
Now what?
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Get Jayson Williams' jury.
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I posted this in another thread:
Go to the auto wrecker... Take a gallon bucket and fill it with shattered auto glass from one of the side windows.
Find a friend's car. Roll the window down. Sprinkle some of the glass from the bucket on the seat and around the outside of the door.
Scoring:
1 point if they get upset.
2 points if they tape up the hole with plastic.
3 points if the auto glass repair shop rolls the window up.
Others:
1. Get a live chicken. On Friday, after he leaves, put the chicken in his office with food and water and close the door.
2. Get a paper or styrofoam cup. Carefully cut out the bottom and place it on his desk. Then, fill the cup with BB ammo and leave it there.
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If you can get to his computer, take a screenshot of the desktop. Then, remove EVERTHING that is there.
Next, make the screenshot the desktop background.
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Good one, Sandman.
I love the screenshot idea....that one's going in.
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Did the screen shot to a work budy!
Took him hours to figure it out.
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There used to be an e-mail sent around.
When you open it, it cranked your speakers all the way up and shouted "Hey, I;m watching porn over here".
Anyone got a url for that one?
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Where do you work and what, exactly, sparked these psuedo-hostilities?
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I work for an investment firm.
Simply enough, the office was redecorated and some of us were relocated.
My enemy got my old desk and I got his. I now have alot of space and a window with a view.
He now sits right in front of the operations manager. (Our equvalent of the KGB).
Needless to say, he fired the first shot.
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How about his email so this could be more fun?
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I'd like to keep my job, thanks.
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Poach his accounts,,,,,,
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Nice....
Well, if you want to get really crude, you could just hide some rancid chinese food under his car seat.
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Switch a few keys on the keyboard. Just pop them off and switch them with the ones next to them.
Vaseline on phone earcup.
Lower the chair.
Add signature to someones email if you can get access to it saying "Hell yes I;m gay and proud of it".
Place wallpaper on computer of pink teddy bears.
Every day, empty his stapler
Put empty beer cans in his trash can.
Turn off the phone ringer, or put volume as low as possible.
If there is a desk clock, move it an hour ahead.
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One word:
Laxatives
This word goes well with words like:
Coffee... Soda... Orange Juice
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Originally posted by Dago
Switch a few keys on the keyboard. Just pop them off and switch them with the ones next to them.
Vaseline on phone earcup.
Lower the chair.
Add signature to someones email if you can get access to it saying "Hell yes I;m gay and proud of it".
Place wallpaper on computer of pink teddy bears.
Every day, empty his stapler
Put empty beer cans in his trash can.
Turn off the phone ringer, or put volume as low as possible.
If there is a desk clock, move it an hour ahead.
hehe-
Stapler emptied.
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Since he's sitting in front of the manager, I would suspect that he's setting you up for a fall.
"Hey, boss! Look what MuckMAW did to me! We should fire that lazy-a** b***ard!"
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A cool melt glue gun does wonders to help keep items on the desk from floating away.
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yes .. but superglue is harder to detect
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Put skunk scent in his cars vents LOL.
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Originally posted by Sandman
If you can get to his computer, take a screenshot of the desktop.
How do you do that??
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Originally posted by Sandman
1. Get a live chicken. On Friday, after he leaves, put the chicken in his office with food and water and close the door.
I was an RA back in 1988 at a small state college and someone did that to a hall director who pissed him off. Only they used some larger farm animals instead. Poor lady came back to a nervous breakdown...They never found out who did it though...
Thats what happens when you put a former nun in charge of an upperclass men's residence hall...:lol
One joke that I did was get into someones room, remove everything that could be moved, and take a photo of the empty room, leaving the camera in the center of the empty room...
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Originally posted by Red Tail 444
How do you do that??
Press the "Print Screen" key on the upper right of your keyboard.
Open your Windows Drawing Program.
Select "File" and then "Paste"
Voila!
You've taken a screenshot.
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steal his swivel chair?
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You lot are evil!
:)
Ravs
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have kids with his wife.
Later down the road, send pictures of your earlobes and nose and whatnot so he can see the resemblence.
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Originally posted by ra
Shoot him.
ROTLMAO....:D Ra:aok
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Scenario 1
Find an extra keyboard
Remove the users keyboard and hide it behind the desk still plugged in!
Then place the new keyboard where the old keyboard was and run the unattached cable as if it was connected..
Listen as the user bangs the hell out of the keyboard thinking the puter is locked up. He may even hardpower off several times trying to figure out why the keyboard doesn't work..
Scenario 2
Purchase a role of reynolds cling wrap, at work cover the urinal underneath the seat with the wrap, hope that the person you want to fall for this has to pee soon! if wrong person pees run like hell and play dumb!
Scenario 3
Go into MS Word or similar program on co-worker's computer, and add an entry to the AutoCorrect feature. This is a very simple prank that will send the novice user into a frenzy. Configure the AutoCorrect option to replace the word "the" with the phrase "you suck!". They will usually panick and start scanning for viruses
Scenario 4
Try to find a very obnoxious CD laying around. Preferably a reggae or rap CD. Pop it in their CD ROM. Put up the sound full blast by double clicking on the volume control on the bottom right. On normal configurations the audio CD will autoplay when windows first starts up. The person starting up there PC in the morning will definitely be embarrassed.
Scenario 5
Change the coffee in the office coffe maker to decafe. Wait about three weeks(or untill you think everybody has gotten over their caffine addiction)and switch to expresso!
Scenario 5
Try "password securing" someone's screen saver. First I suggest changing the screen saver to "scrolling marque" and inserting your own word or phrase, "Mr. Jones (president or supervisor) eats SHlT" or something to that effect.
Scenario 6
pop out the 'm' and 'n' key on someone's keyboard and reverse the two. Any flat tool will work. Just pry it with little pressure and they will easily come right off. Then just sit back and watch the confusion.
Scenario 7
It is allways a good habit to lock your computer before heading off for coffee or a smoke. When someone forgets and leaves a Word document or an email open, type a single word somewhere in the text. “*****” or so will do nicely. They’ll never notice and send it out
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edit something so that whatever the standard internet homepage is starts up on a forbidden type site ...then watch them scream as they try figure it out...visit http://www.happyhacker.org for info on how to do this
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I've seen this happen... it works.
Find the sleaziest gay sex mag you can (ok, it helps if the guy is not gay, if so... just find something really sleazy). Buy a subscription to said magazine in his name, and naturally, have it sent to his office-work address. Use a money order or something to make the purchase.
...be there when it arrives and encourage him to open the package when everyone is in the office, of course... be sure an point it out to everyone.
Tumor
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If your really pissed:
If you park outside in the Sun, grab a thing of balogna or a carton of eggs and "Cook Breakfast" on his roof or hood.
If your mildy pissed:
Unscrew certain key peices to his chair, that should provide some good laughs.
Edit:
Find a Male stripper that will dance for guys, Tell him to approach the guy at the office dressed as a Police Officer.
That will raise some eyebrows!
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Tape the phone reciever button down. When it rings he'll pick it up, but because of the tape the phone won't let the button up. As a result, his phone will ring off the hook but he can't answer it. Done this many a time to people who have gotten on my nerves! Usually they don't even notice the tape until someone else points it out to them. He might even call in a phone tech to fix it!
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Flakbait [Delta6]
Delta Six's Flight School (http://www.wa-net.com/~delta6)
Put the P-61B in Aces High
(http://www.wa-net.com/~delta6/sig/geek.gif)
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Originally posted by muckmaw
Press the "Print Screen" key on the upper right of your keyboard.
Open your Windows Drawing Program.
Select "File" and then "Paste"
Voila!
You've taken a screenshot.
I'm gonna try it on my Secretary...test run #1... LOL
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Originally posted by flakbait
Tape the phone reciever button down. When it rings he'll pick it up, but because of the tape the phone won't let the button up. As a result, his phone will ring off the hook but he can't answer it. Done this many a time to people who have gotten on my nerves! Usually they don't even notice the tape until someone else points it out to them. He might even call in a phone tech to fix it!
Yeah we phone tech soooo love that particular joke
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Originally posted by Nefarious
If your really pissed:
If you park outside in the Sun, grab a thing of balogna or a carton of eggs and "Cook Breakfast" on his roof or hood.
If your mildy pissed:
Unscrew certain key peices to his chair, that should provide some good laughs.
Those both sound like excellent ways to get a lawsuit filed against you.
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When he goes to lunch ( knowing he's not there) have a friend call and ask for him ( obviously won't be there) have your friend ( In his best "queer eye for the straight guy voice" ) ask the leave a message cause it's VERY important...... "Tell ( fill in name here) It's Brucey, I tested positive and he REALLY needs to see a Dr."
I accually did this to a fireman friend, He said the whole squad was laughing for weeks.
NUTTZ
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Open a word document, smear whiteout on the screen, and take a photograph of the monitor with enough of his desk showing to make it clear who's desk it is.
Take the ball out of his mouse.
Whoopee cushion, oldie but goodie.
Buy flowers and large metallic balloon that says "woohoo 40 years old!" (or 50, whatever the next big jump for this guy would be) and have them delivered to his desk/cubicle.
Paint his name on a parking spot right near the front of the building, preferrably in a better spot than his boss.
Bend all of his paperclips open just enough so they don't grip paper anymore.
Every day, or at least every Friday, leave an anonymous foam cup with about 1/2 inches of coffee in it on his desk when you leave work. After a while, leave one on his bosses desk.
Have empty envelopes sent to him at work.
If you feel creative, send a series of them with an official sort of markings. After about half a dozen of these, send a blank envelope marked "notice of unpaid debt" in large letters.
Delete all his internet explorer cookies and reset the password cache.
Delete all .pwl files on his computer.
Password encrypt his .pst file if he leaves his email open. Make the password his last name so when he complains about not knowing the password, you first gather a few people around to "help", then casually suggest he try something easy to remember, like his last name. Roll your eyes when he protests that he didn't do it.
Password encrypt someone elses .pst file with your opponent's last name, then suggest that the innocent victim also try this guy's last name since he didn't remember messing with his own file, maybe he messed with someone elses too.
Change various shortcuts on his desktop to point at command.com.
Change his default printer to the one in the CEO's office, or at least another printer that would be publically embarassing to send a dozen documents to while wondering why they're not printing where they usually do.
Take someone's phone off the hook, and then set your enemy's phone into busy-wait callback mode to that extension. When the off-the-hook phone is placed back on the hook, they both ring and connect to each other with the usual confusing results. Why are you calling me? I didn't call you, you called me!
Pretend to trip on something every time you walk past his desk or cubicle.
Transfer supplies from the cleaners closet to his desk drawers or cubicle. Point people in his direction when they're looking for more toilet paper, paper towels, or other cleaning supplies.
Remove the erasers from all his pencils.
Replace his whiteboard pens with permanent, permanent pens with waterbased, etc etc.
Leave the company prospectus for your companies biggest competitor on his desk in plain sight while he's away. Put prominent yellow stickies on certain pages with notes like "mention this during interview".
Place 2 polarized anti-glare filters over his screen, rotated 90 degrees from each other.
If he uses a laser pointer or any other device during presentations, ensure that the batteries are dead before he gives his next presentation.
Sprinkle sawdust under his desk or chair and claim you saw a mouse under his desk.
Use all of his kleenex.
Replace his yellow post-its with pink ones.
Switch all the caps around on his highlighters or colored pens.
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I saw this one in maxim.
If he has his own fax machine this is great especially if it is one that spools. Print out a banner in word....landscape style. YOU ARE GAY or somthing like that. Make sure its long enough to feed into the feeder and tape to the other end. tape all the pages together and send the fax. As its feeding through tape the other end together so it will continually feed its self. It will keep going till you hit stop.
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1. if he's one of those guys with regularly scheduled bathroom visits.
get there before him, take a small mayo packet (like from a fast food place), fold it in half and poke a small hole in the top side by the fold, tuck it between the seat and the bowl of the toilet.
when he sits it will spray a white cream all over his ass.
2. most cushioned chairs have a few 1" dia vent holes in the base under the cushion. slide a thumb-tack (or something longer if you hate him more or the cushion is extra thick). stick it into the underside of the cushion, off to the side a bit(so he doesn't hit it every time he sits). when they sit the point will poke through, when they stand the cushion raises and hides it. in 11th grade we had a teacher spend a whole class period trying to find what was sticking her in the ass, she ended up calling the custodian to fix her defective chair.
3. put bird food (what ever type is appropriate for where your are, here we used frenchfries because seagulls will eat anything) on his car. when he gets off work he will find every bird in town has used his car for a toilet.
if you where in a more industrial environment I'd have a library of tricks to help you with, most of my office type pranks are old (from HS or my brief employment at an insurance company) it also helps to actually know the guy because a truly great prank has to either play on his ego, or his fears.
edit- on the bird food prank, try to put enough for a decent effect but not enough to have any left. for the best impact there should be no food left to give a clue why the birds chose his car for a toilet.
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You guys freinds doing pranks on eachother or not?
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I keep seagulls off my dock with a soup of cayenne pepper.
I get about a pound of peppers and a gallon or two of water and cook a sort of tea out of it. Then I spray it all over the dock and when gulls land on it, it causes their feet to burn and they don't stay landed on the dock for long.
Seems to me that some of this on the rim of a coffee cup could be a lot of laughs.
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While he's not lookin. dunk some laxitive in his morning coffee :)
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Originally posted by YUCCA
While he's not lookin. dunk some laxitive in his morning coffee :)
Oh man thats Chitty:(
Or soon will be:p
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when we where kids and spent a summer at the coast, we'd make little sandwiches for the gulls. 1 slice of white-bread, generously covered with horseradish, fold it in half and pinch it together to make a little pie.
the first one will drop it but the second will gulp it whole, funny stuff watching a seagull with a mouth full of hot.
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Switch the decaffeinated coffee with the caffeinated coffee. If they come in a can, pour the coffee out in a clean trash bag. Then empty the contents of the decaf into the regular can. Finish up by dumping the regular coffee from the trash bag into the decaf can.
Most people put so much sugar and cream in their decaf they will not be able to detect that extra buzz.
Advertise a colleague’s job and leave their number with extension for contact. Make sure it is well paying and with low qualifications.
Call one of your co-workers and tell them that you are a producer from the Ricki Lake Show and that someone from their past would like to confront them or reunite with them on the show. Then talk about airline reservations, hotel accommodations, etc. When they ask for more information, say that you're not able to give them any information and they will find out the day of the show. Their brains will be working overtime trying to think of who would want to confront them that nothing will get done that day.
(can substitue with jerry springer :)
Write a fake letter from some nameless union representative about a study that is being conducted on the effects of computer monitor radiation on men's sperm count asking them to bring a sample into work the next day. Ask them to drop off the samples with whomever you also want to embarrass. Then place copies of these letters in the pigeonholes of some men around the office you also want to get.
Paint a thin application of rubber cement on a railing leading down a flight of stairs.
Tie a thin monofiliment fishing line to the phone of your victim. Feel free to also attach other things such as pencil holders, lights, inboxes, anything easy and hopefully non-breakable.
Push the victims chair under the desk and tie the other line to a leg of the chair. When the victim pulls out the chair, everything goes flying off the desk on the other side.
Microsoft Word has a lovely feature called AutoCorrect. If you type in a word like "teh", it assumes that you really meant "the" and corrects the spelling of the word automatically.
You can view the entire list of words by going to Tools and AutoCorrect. The list is entirely editable and easy to change.
So what's stopping you from making a few changes?
Just head down the list and find a few easy to misspell words and have a little fun. A great one to start with is "the". Type in "the" and reword it to "teh"! But don't stop there. Type in "boobs" and make the correct spelling "knockers". Let your imagination run wild.
Just remember the words you set up so that you can easily change the list back at a future time.
Most people get frustrated and assume that Word is misbehaving. They never suspect it is a coworker that is defective.
This prank will really frustrate any hunt and peck typist.
Take a look at your keyboard. Notice how the M and the N key are just sitting there side by side? It's easy to confuse them. Especially if you swap around the keys on the keyboard.
Pry off the keys using a screwdriver or a house key. They should pop off rather easily. Swap the keys and press them back into place.
The great thing about this prank is that it can be done with just about any keyboard you run across.
Leave a message for a coworker that a "Mr. Bear" called for them. Write down the number for the local city zoo as the phone number to call.
Other useful names include: Buffy Lowe, Ellie Font, Jay Raffe, Ty Gere, Bab Heun and the old standby, Anna Conda
Take a container of lice powder and open it up. Leave the container in the bathroom when nobody is looking so it looks like someone just used it.
Take a piece of clear tape and place it over the mouseball. This will prevent the mouse ball from turning and frustrate the user.
This trick is quite easy for the user to figure out and it is easy to set up.
However, if you really want to be cruel, slightly unplug the mouse cable from the computer as well.
I copied and pasted it from a post someone made in a different BBS. ENJOY :)
BTW hitech be carefull if you are reading this. Because skuzzy probably already has.
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This one worked well. Pass on a message that there had been errors on a customer's paperwork. Serious enough to get him worried. He rings the customer in a panic. Customer thinks he's nuts. When we did it once the customer guessed what we were up to and play him along for a while. The poor guy thought his career was over for a few minutes.
Finding someone's email open is a gift but you really have to be careful or you will get fired:confused:
One bit of fun in a long open plan office was to ring each phone extension in turn one or two rings each,working your way down the length of the office. That usually gets the whole office buzzing.
Make up a fake newspaper story on your PC using the same font as your local newspaper, maybe about his house being on a fault line or a new highway behind his house and photocopy it so that it looks like it appeared in the current edition and leave the copy on his desk with a FYI. :lol
All of these worked very well for me.
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i have spent the last 30 mins laughing..thx all :rofl
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Originally posted by muckmaw
Done...
Now what?
you always got a problem with a body.
best way to deal with it is to chop it into 5 pieces.
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Wildcard, it could be worse. I've used an epoxy syringe for that trick on a few different occasions.
Another good one is to pin the wheels of his chair in place. Most chairs have two wheels per mount with a pass-through axle. Just wedge something in there (paperclips are your friend) to stop one or two from turning. This can be highly annoying, especially if you do this on lineoleum floors. Ever heard a wheel screech on that stuff from across the office?
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Flakbait [Delta6]
Delta Six's Flight School (http://www.wa-net.com/~delta6)
Put the P-61B in Aces High
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