Aces High Bulletin Board
General Forums => The O' Club => Topic started by: Riggs on July 15, 2004, 09:20:28 AM
-
Democrat, Republican or Southern Republican?
What with elections coming up, we should all decide.
Question: How do you tell the difference between Democrats, Republicans and Southern Republicans? The answer can be found by posing the following question:
You're walking down a deserted street with your wife and two small children. Suddenly, a dangerous looking man with a huge knife comes around the corner, locks eyes with you, screams obscenities, raises the knife, and charges. You are carrying a Glock .40, and you are an expert shot. You have mere seconds before he reaches you and your family. What do you do?
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Democrat's Answer:
Well, that's not enough information to answer the question!
Does the man look poor or Oppressed?
Have I ever done anything to him that would inspire him to attack?
Could we run away?
What does my wife think?
What about the kids?
Could I possibly swing the gun like a club and knock the knife out of his hand?
What does the law say about this situation?
Does the Glock have appropriate safety built into it?
Why am I carrying a loaded gun anyway, and what kind of message does this send to society and to my children?
Is it possible he'd be happy with just killing me?
Does he definitely want to kill me, or would he be content just to wound me?
If I were to grab his knees and hold on, could my family get away while he was stabbing me?
Should I call 9-1-1?
Why is this street so deserted?
We need to raise taxes, have a paint and weed day and make this a happier, healthier street that would discourage such behavior.
This is all so confusing!
I need to debate this with some friends for a few days and try to come to a consensus.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Republican's Answer:
BANG!
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Southern Republican's Answer:
BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! click....(sounds of reloading).
BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! click
Daughter: "Nice grouping, Daddy! Were those the Winchester Silver Tips??"
-
:rofl
<~~~southern Republican
-
A true southern Republican wouldnt carry a Glock and the Pointy white hoods he and his family were wearing would have scared the knife weilding bad guy away
-
A true southern Republican wouldnt carry a Glock
A true southern Republican would not discriminate any gun....the Glock would be fine :aok
RHIN0
-
"What do you do?"
Start kicking and blaming myself for being there and for my presence forcing that mild mannered, innocent man, wielding a weapon, to start screaming obscenities and charging me and my family with that a raised knife.
-
Originally posted by Fauxbra
A true southern Republican wouldnt carry a Glock and the Pointy white hoods he and his family were wearing would have scared the knife weilding bad guy away
You owe me a Niki engine and wind shield you **** I guess T U R D is a no no.
-
I am surprised.
I have discovered myself as a southern republican.
There's a cure?
Or I have to resort to Assisted Suicide?
:eek:
-
Originally posted by Naso
I am surprised.
I have discovered myself as a southern republican.
There's a cure?
Or I have to resort to Assisted Suicide?
:eek:
Move to Palermo they will solve it for you
-
Originally posted by storch
Move to Palermo they will solve it for you
Thanks for the hint, you are a good friend.
-
I would ask my girlfriend to deal with it. She claims i dont take her seriously anyway so id give her a chanse to solve the problem.
-
I wouldnt do anything until the U.N. gave me permission, which we all know is the stamp of legitimacy these days.
-
hmmm.... well I've never had a problem meeting women and I can always make NEW kids.... RUN!!!!!
;)
-
Originally posted by Grits
which we all know is the stamp of legitimacy these days.
thanks to americas strong backing of its stamps...
-
(http://elvis.rowan.edu/~cherasar/graphics/hijacked.jpg)
I'm gettin good use outta this one lately :)
(I'd be a Southern Republican)
-
Originally posted by vorticon
thanks to americas strong backing of its stamps...
If the U.N. did something other than bilk member states for money, maybe we could back them.
You know France is blocking U.N. intervention to stop genocide in the Sudan because it might harm economic arrangements there right? Anybody remember the U.N.'s decisive action to save innocent people from genocide in Cambodia, the Balkans, Rwanda, Liberia, or East Timor?
-
None of the above.
I am perfectly capapble of thinking and deciding for myself and as such I neither need nor want any policital party to dictate who I should vote for based on party affiliation.
Both of the major parties contain nothing but clowns who care more for spewing pure BS and maintaining their own parties powerbase and siding with one side over the other simply for the sake of being on their particular side with little or no reguard as to whats good for the country.
If the Dems come up with a good idea the Reps try their absolute best to shoot it down simply cause its a Dem idea. And vise versa
I have been and remain absolutely convinced that these die hard political party types if faced with the choice of having Satan running in their party and Christ on the other, would still vote for Satan for no other reason then he was in their party.
"Rah rah im a Republican so I only vote republican"
"Rah Rah Im a Democrat so I only vote Democrat"
Rah rah. that only tells me your a braindead lemming, Rah rah
-
Amen Drediock...people who use Labels to define themselves never cease to amuse me.
ohh and Storch....im sorry, i didnt get close enough to see the Hot Pink Lipstick and matching Beret..otherwise i would have let you go.
-
I say o chap,whens the last time a demos had a good idea?
-
Demos are the only ones with ideas.
The entire Republican reason for being is to say that those ideas are bad ones.
-
Originally posted by Fauxbra
Amen Drediock...people who use Labels to define themselves never cease to amuse me.
ohh and Storch....im sorry, i didnt get close enough to see the Hot Pink Lipstick and matching Beret..otherwise i would have let you go.
fauxpas fauxbra
-
And here we see the misspelling of a misinterpretation. When two worlds collide.
-
Originally posted by Nash
And here we see the misspelling of a misinterpretation. When two worlds collide.
Christ Nash, don't you ever sleep?
-
Originally posted by Nash
Demos are the only ones with ideas.
The entire Republican reason for being is to say that those ideas are bad ones.
hmmmmm....
-
Originally posted by NUKE
hmmmmm....
Word, man.
When the Dems take control it's like, "WHOOHOO we are gonna do THIS then we're gonna do THAT" and they get busy.
When the Repubs win they're like, "Damn... NOW just WTF are we gonna DO? We been railing against government this whole time 'cept now we ARE IT! Anyone got any ideas?"
"I know".... says sheepish voice in back...
Make the whole thing about someone or something else...
Repubs have some damn good ideas to be sure. They suck bellybutton at governing.
-
Originally posted by Nash
Word, man.
When the Dems take control it's like, "WHOOHOO we are gonna do THIS then we're gonna do THAT" and they get busy.
They "do this and that".....as in raise taxes, gut the military, bend over for the UN and pander to bums and support illegals aliens.
Why do you care anyway? :)
-
Repubs have some damn good ideas to be sure. They suck bellybutton at governing.
Our economy is growing at a record pace. Thank God the repubs suck that way.
-
Originally posted by NUKE
They "do this and that".....as in raise taxes, gut the military, bend over for the UN and pander to bums and support illegals aliens.
Why do you care anyway? :)
right because all those Illegal Aliens snuck in when Clinton was in office eh:rofl
Republicans remind me of my Ex-girlfriend...she never needed to make more $$$ ....ie raise taxes , she just charged it all on her Visa:rolleyes:
-
Originally posted by Fauxbra
right because all those Illegal Aliens snuck in when Clinton was in office eh:rofl
Republicans remind me of my Ex-girlfriend...she never needed to make more $$$ ....ie raise taxes , she just charged it all on her Visa:rolleyes:
Wow!!!!! Fauxbra please explain that comment
-
Storch... if you are thinking of only the last half of his post, Fauxbra has never read the following, or at least does not understand it.
The Congress shall have Power To lay and collect Taxes, Duties, Imposts and Excises, to pay the Debts and provide for the common Defence and general Welfare of the United States; but all Duties, Imposts and Excises shall be uniform throughout the United States; To borrow Money on the credit of the United States;
The same party was in control of Congress the last time the federal budget was arguably 'balanced' as is now in power.
The opposite party was in control of Congress for the better than thirty straight years of deficit spending between the early 60's to the mid 90's, broken only by one two year period in the Senate during the Reagan years.
-
Originally posted by Holden McGroin
Storch... if you are thinking of only the last half of his post, Fauxbra has never read the following, or at least does not understand it.
The same party was in control of Congress the last time the federal budget was arguably 'balanced' as is now in power.
The opposite party was in control of Congress for the better than thirty straight years of deficit spending between the early 60's to the mid 90's, broken only by one two year period in the Senate during the Reagan years.
Thanks for picking up on that Holden. Since fauxbra is a good guy I'm sure it was a misstatement or a misunderstanding. surely no one can refute ill effects and the almost irrepairable societal or (shall I dare say it?) criminal damage caused by LBJ and the liberal's irresponsible social experimentation rammed down our throats as the "Great Society". you really don't want to get me started on FDR and his zany policies. that man was the closest thing to a dictator we have ever had. we are still paying for those experiments today. yet look who the pinheads bring to fore as their representative. I stand in awe, wonder and amazement at the incredible stupidity of our liberal friends. Short attention span and even shorter memories on those models. We really need to have them recalled.
-
damn nash... you sure know a lot about Americans and America... If we would let you in you would make a good woman democrat.
lazs
-
awww.... are you callin' me names again Lazs? Geeze....
It hurts my womanly feelings when you do that.
-
It really doesn't matter who is involved in the scenario above... They will all end up being conservatives (if they live) afterwards.
It is like watching the true crime shows where all the women relatives of the murder victim are interviewed during the telling of the crime and... everyone of em wants the bastard who did it to fry but they were probly all rabid anti death penalty before it was their ox being gored. No death penalty except for the guy who screws with me or mine basicaly,
That is the deal with liberals.. they think in terms of grey rather than black and white. They feel that they are elite and that they will control the system because they are smarter than their fellow man... they believe in grey area in crime because any crime they commit they feel they, as elite, should be excussed from if they have a good enough reason...
they all want to be treated special because they are "different".
lazs
-
I was just wondering nash... you spend so much time and effort studying American politics without actually participating or even being around us.
Why is that?
lazs
-
I spend tons of time and effort doing a LOT of things, lazs.
Don't confuse your country's appearent self pre-occupation and fondess for talking about itself, and my lame contributions with some kind of obsession. Just how willing are you to discuss Canadian politics? I didn't think so...
It's all about you, champ... and you wouldn't have it any other way. So don't b1tch about it.
-
Still... It seem that you feel capable of telling the people who live under our system what is wrong with it. You have no practical experiance yet you are obsessed with U.S. politics.
Maybe if you used all that energy to fix your own wasted political system you could do some good? Maybe your money would be worth something? Maybe you wouldn't have to have two languages. Maybe you wouldn't have time for all the envy.
lazs
-
As far as practical experience... I lived there for a number of years. But of course you prolly don't consider Manhattan as really part of the US anyways...
In your state alone.... Lets see... Brother in LA, both parents grads of USC... damn I have so many relatives all up and down that coast it's ridiculous. Nobody in Dixon though, heh.
However, as far as "envy" goes.... I moved to Canada. So guess again.
What is this.... a job interview? Or do you still have a crush on me?
-
My brother is canadian and I have spent 4 or 5 summers there. Yet.... I have no interest in getting involved in your politics...so, it would appear that I am either callous and shallow or... I indeed have no interest in you.
manhattan is not really the U.S. as far as I could tell.. most big cities aren't How people can live like that is beyond me. It is a different kind of hedonism... it is the hedonism of the elite. I do pretty much what I want to do but feel trapped and claustrophobic in big cities...
Big cities are great for liberals... they are cold. they epitomize the philosophy of the liberal who loves humanty but hates people... humanity is all around them but they don't have to interact. You can divorce yourself from people in a big city.
lazs
-
Nash, it seems like we do have 1 thing in common,our choice in girls seem pretty close,do they get tired of repeating the same dance?I do have to give the edge to morph,that one kills me lol.
Laz, some how canada decided to follow the french example instead of the british example.There it is in a nut shell,congrats. u made it thru jr.college knowing all u need to about canadas history.. ................... [play on nashs remarks lol]
-
Doesn't really match my experience, but I could easily see how some people could experience it that way.
I know enough about myself though to figure out that my own personal experience of a thing doesn't neccessarily mean I have a firm grasp on the truth or essense of it.
Some people like Ohio. I hate Ohio. Who's right... me or them?
Your comfort zone forces you to put things into crisply defined packages and to point at them, saying "bad" and "good". I don't feel that same constricting influence. I don't need to do that to feel comfortable. Perhaps it's the "grey" you were talking about. I don't knock you for it, nor sympathize.... none of that. The worlds a big place, we're all gonna die someday, so whatever it takes.
-
Originally posted by storch
Thanks for picking up on that Holden. Since fauxbra is a good guy I'm sure it was a misstatement or a misunderstanding. surely no one can refute ill effects and the almost irrepairable societal or (shall I dare say it?) criminal damage caused by LBJ and the liberal's irresponsible social experimentation rammed down our throats as the "Great Society". you really don't want to get me started on FDR and his zany policies. that man was the closest thing to a dictator we have ever had. we are still paying for those experiments today. yet look who the pinheads bring to fore as their representative. I stand in awe, wonder and amazement at the incredible stupidity of our liberal friends. Short attention span and even shorter memories on those models. We really need to have them recalled.
Actually i was referring to our $500+ billion deficit and the $318 billion we spent last year paying interest on the $7 trillion we owe , which was largely created by Rep's. But please dont take this as an endorsement for Democrats....my point was only to counter "Nuke's" silly comment. Storch i for 1 would like to get you started on FDR by the way....(diving under desk)
-
Originally posted by lazs2
It really doesn't matter who is involved in the scenario above... They will all end up being conservatives (if they live) afterwards.
Could very well be the absolute dumbest sentence ive ever read. But thank you for posting it ...now i have something to use as a benchmark in the future
-
Originally posted by Fauxbra
Actually i was referring to our $500+ billion deficit and the $318 billion we spent last year paying interest on the $7 trillion we owe , which was largely created by Rep's. But please dont take this as an endorsement for Democrats....my point was only to counter "Nuke's" silly comment. Storch i for 1 would like to get you started on FDR by the way....(diving under desk)
LOL
-
what about it didn't you like faux? It is like watching former sensitive liberals asking for the death penalty (often for torture) when one of their family is brutalized.
lazs
-
It should not be surprising that college students tend to be Liberal. Youth is a time of hubris and ambition. The Liberal mind is certain it knows what is best for others. There could be no more accurate description of a typical 19-year old. Conservatism will settle in when it comes time to get a houses mortgage or braces for the kids. (http://www.suite101.com/article.cfm/392/20590)