Aces High Bulletin Board
General Forums => The O' Club => Topic started by: TheDudeDVant on December 13, 2004, 12:26:31 PM
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Recently a routine police patrol parked outside a local neighbourhood tavern.
Late in the evening the officer noticed a man leaving the bar so intoxicated that he could barely walk. The man stumbled around the car park for a few minutes, with the officer quietly observing. After what seemed an eternity and trying his keys on five vehicles, the man managed to find his car which he fell into. He was there for a few minutes as a number of other patrons left the bar and drove off. Finally he started the car, switched the wipers on and off (it was a fine dry night), flicked the indicators on, then off, tooted the horn and then switched on the lights. He moved the vehicle forward a few inches, reversed a little and then remained stationary for a few more minutes as some more vehicles left.
At last he pulled out of car park and started to drive slowly down the road. The police officer, having patiently waited all this time, now started up the patrol car, put on the flashing lights, promptly pulled the man over and carried out a breathalyser test. To his amazement the breathalyser indicated no evidence of the man having consumed alcohol at all!
Dumbfounded, the officer said "I'll have to ask you to accompany me to the Police station. This breath-analyser equipment must be broken."
"I doubt it." said the man. "Tonight I'm the designated decoy." :lol :lol
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A police officer pulls over a speeding car. The officer says, I clocked you at 80 miles per hour, sir." The driver says, "Sorry, officer I had it on cruise control at 60, >perhaps your radar gun needs calibrating."
Not looking up from her knitting the wife says: "Now don't be silly dear, you know that this car doesn't have cruise control." As the officer writes out the ticket, the driver looks over at his wife and growls, "Can't you please keep your mouth shut for once?" The wife smiles demurely and says, "You should be thankful your radar detector went off when it did." As the officer makes out the second ticket for the illegal radar detector unit, the man glowers at his wife and says through clenched teeth, "Darn it, woman, can't you keep your mouth shut?" The officer frowns and says, "And I notice that you're not wearing your seat belt, sir. That's an automatic £75 fine." The driver says, "Yeah, well, you see officer, I had it on, but took it off when you pulled me over so that I could get my license out of my back pocket." The wife says, "Now, dear, you know very well that you didn't have your seat belt on. You never wear your seat belt when you're driving." As the police officer is writing out the third ticket the driver turns to his wife and barks, "WHY DON'T YOU PLEASE SHUT UP??" The officer looks over at the woman and asks, "Does your husband always talk to you this way, Ma'am?" (women love this part....) "Only when he's been drinking."
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:rofl
I wonder if they could arrest you for being the designated decoy? That would definately work.
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Originally posted by Vudak
:rofl
I wonder if they could arrest you for being the designated decoy? That would definately work.
Obstruction of justice.
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Only if you are stupid enough to explain what you are doing.
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Yeah, but if you don't explain it, well, then where's the joy in that?
Besides, it'd be pretty crummy if a real drunk killed someone due to that prank...
Guess I'll put it on the "Wish I Could but Can't" List.
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Originally posted by TheDudeDVant
Recently a routine police patrol parked outside a local neighbourhood tavern.
Late in the evening the officer noticed a man leaving the bar so intoxicated that he could barely walk. The man stumbled around the car park for a few minutes, with the officer quietly observing. After what seemed an eternity and trying his keys on five vehicles, the man managed to find his car which he fell into. He was there for a few minutes as a number of other patrons left the bar and drove off. Finally he started the car, switched the wipers on and off (it was a fine dry night), flicked the indicators on, then off, tooted the horn and then switched on the lights. He moved the vehicle forward a few inches, reversed a little and then remained stationary for a few more minutes as some more vehicles left.
At last he pulled out of car park and started to drive slowly down the road. The police officer, having patiently waited all this time, now started up the patrol car, put on the flashing lights, promptly pulled the man over and carried out a breathalyser test. To his amazement the breathalyser indicated no evidence of the man having consumed alcohol at all!
Dumbfounded, the officer said "I'll have to ask you to accompany me to the Police station. This breath-analyser equipment must be broken."
"I doubt it." said the man. "Tonight I'm the designated decoy." :lol :lol
That urban legend is so old, it has false teeth. I first heard this one back in the mid 1960s - soon after Britain introduced the breathalyser test.
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I first heard this one back in the mid 1960s - soon after Britain introduced the breathalyser test. [/B]
Speaking of old.....
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Wait, why didn't he just drive them home if he was sober?
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Originally posted by Vudak
:rofl
I wonder if they could arrest you for being the designated decoy? That would definately work.
You'd get arrested for driving under the influence of drugs. Of course you'd get off when the blood test results came back negative (assuming they do), but you'd still spend some time taking a ride downtown and getting jabbed in the arm.
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Originally posted by Martlet
Speaking of old.....
BEAT ME TO THE PUNCH you sob!!! lolol good one haha 8)
And an even better one from THE DOOD DEVIANT!!!!!!!!!! lol l luv u bro haha. In a Muppet kinda way!
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lol bro!
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Originally posted by hawker238
Obstruction of justice.
wrong.
reason, cop could went after anyone he wanted to, the guy didn't try to stop the cop or force the cop to do anything.