Aces High Bulletin Board
General Forums => The O' Club => Topic started by: Gunslinger on December 14, 2004, 07:23:08 PM
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my mom emailed me this one. I thaught it was pretty good! (sorry i was too lazy to take out all the >'s)
> Subject: Raising Boys
>
>
> a) For those with no children - this is totally hysterical!
> >
> >b) For those who already have children past this age, this is
>hilarious.
> >
> >c) For those who have children this age, this is not funny.
> >
> >d) For those who have children nearing this age, this is a warning.
> >
> >e) For those who have not yet had children, this is birth control.
> >
> >
> >
> >The following came from an anonymous Mother in Austin, Texas...
> >
> >
> >
> >Things I've learned from my Boy's (honest and not kidding):
> >
> >
> >
> >1.) A king size waterbed holds enough water to fill a 2000 sq. ft house
>4
> >inches deep.
> >
> >
> >
> >2.) If you spray hair spray on dust bunnies and run over them with
>Roller
> >blades, they can ignite.
> >
> >
> >
> >3.) A 3-year old Boy's voice is louder than 200 adults in a crowded
> >restaurant.
> >
> >
> >
> >4.) If you hook a dog leash over a ceiling fan, the motor is not strong
> >enough to rotate a 42 pound Boy wearing Batman underwear and a Superman
> >cape. It is strong enough, however, if tied to a paint can, to spread
>paint
> >on all four walls of a 20x20 ft. room.
> >
> >
> >
> >5.) You should not throw baseballs up when the ceiling fan is on. When
>using
> >a ceiling fan as a bat, you have to throw the ball up a few times
>before you
> >get a hit. A ceiling fan can hit a baseball a long way.
> >
> >
> >
> >6.) The glass in windows (even double-pane) doesn't stop a baseball hit
>by a
> >ceiling fan.
> >
> >
> >
> >7.) When you hear the toilet flush and the words "uh oh", it's already
>too
> >late.
> >
> >
> >
> >8.) Brake fluid mixed with Clorox makes smoke, and lots of it.
> >
> >
> >
> >9.) A six-year old Boy can start a fire with a flint rock even though a
> >36-year old man says they can only do it in the movies.
> >
> >
> >
> >10.) Certain Lego's will pass through the digestive tract of a 4-year
>old
> >Boy.
> >
> >
> >
> >11.) Play dough and microwave should not be used in the same sentence.
> >
> >
> >
> >12.) Super glue is forever.
> >
> >
> >
> >13.) No matter how much Jell-O you put in a swimming pool you still
>can't
> >walk on water.
> >
> >
> >
> >14.) Pool filters do not like Jell-O.
> >
> >
> >
> >15.) VCR's do not eject "PB & J" sandwiches even though TV commercials
>show
> >they do.
> >
> >
> >
> >16.) Garbage bags do not make good parachutes.
> >
> >
> >
> >17.) Marbles in gas tanks make lots of noise when driving.
> >
> >
> >
> >18.) You probably DO NOT want to know what that odor is.
> >
> >
> >
> >19.) Always look in the oven before you turn it on; plastic toys do not
>like
> >ovens.
> >
> >
> >
> >20.) The fire department in La Mesa, CA has a 5-minute response time.
> >
> >
> >
> >21.) The spin cycle on the washing machine does not make earthworms
>dizzy.
> >
> >
> >
> >22.) It will, however, make cats dizzy.
> >
> >
> >
> >23.) Cats throw up twice their body weight when dizzy.
> >
> >
> >
> >24.) 80% of Men who read this will try mixing the Clorox and brake
>fluid.
> >
> >
> >
> >Women will pass this on to almost all of their friends, with or without
> >kids.
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24.) 80% of Men who read this will try mixing the Clorox and brake
>fluid.
LOL!!!!!
How did it know????????
:D
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Originally posted by GRUNHERZ
24.) 80% of Men who read this will try mixing the Clorox and brake
>fluid.
LOL!!!!!
How did it know????????
:D
They woman are the smart and they read good ;)
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Originally posted by GRUNHERZ
24.) 80% of Men who read this will try mixing the Clorox and brake
>fluid.
LOL!!!!!
How did it know????????
:D
I hope not! Thats a lethal combination if inhaled.
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A lil common sense goes a long way...........
Seems obvious to me, that you would not want to breathe bleach ever, no matter what its mixxed with. And mixxing anything with bleach is dangerous, even other cleaners. I learned that 1 back when I didnt use common sense as often as I do now.
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Originally posted by GRUNHERZ
24.) 80% of Men who read this will try mixing the Clorox and brake
>fluid.
LOL!!!!!
How did it know????????
:D
Hehe no chit.
Moment i read that i thought to myself.. "hmmm really, i gotta see this."
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Was gona ay something about powered chlorine, but someone whould try it and die. So nevermind. :D
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Cats throw up twice their body weight when dizzy.
HaaaaaaaaaaaR....
I KNEW this one already!
:aok
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19.) Always look in the oven before you turn it on; plastic toys do not like ovens.
I can confirm this is true. I always check now.
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Originally posted by A_Clown
A lil common sense goes a long way...........
Seems obvious to me, that you would not want to breathe bleach ever, no matter what its mixxed with. And mixxing anything with bleach is dangerous, even other cleaners. I learned that 1 back when I didnt use common sense as often as I do now.
Unless its mixed with sodium and hydrogen gas. That just makes salt water.
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Can of propane lighter fluid, a piece of 3 inch diameter PVC, and a potato. 'Nuff said.