Aces High Bulletin Board
General Forums => The O' Club => Topic started by: Habu on December 25, 2004, 09:00:06 AM
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I wanted to send out some sort of holiday greeting to all of you here on the Aces High Bulliten Board, but it is so difficult in today's USA to know exactly what to say without offending someone or opening yourself to a lawsuit especially when you have anything to do with anything that flies people. So I met with my attorney today, and on his advice (and after $1,200. in attorney's fees) I wish to say the following:
Please accept with no obligation, implied or implicit, my best wishes for an environmentally conscious, socially responsible, gun free, low stress, nonaddictive, gender neutral, celebration of the winter solstice holiday, practiced within the most enjoyable traditions of the religious persuasion of your choice, or secular practices of our choice, with respect for the religious/secular persuasions and/or traditions of others, or their choice not to practice religious or secular traditions at all.
I also wish you a fiscally successful, personally fulfilling, and medically uncomplicated recognition of the onset of the generally accepted calendar year 2005, but not without due respect for the calendars of choice of other cultures whose contributions to society have helped make America great (not to imply that America is necessarily greater than any other country or is the only "AMERICA" in the western hemisphere), and without regard to the race, creed, color, age, physical ability, religious faith, or sexual preference of the wishes.
By accepting this greeting, you are accepting these terms: This greeting is subject to clarification or withdrawal. It is freely transferable with no alteration to the original greeting. It implies no promise by the wisher to actually implement any of the wishes for her/himself or others, and is void where prohibited by law, and is revocable at the sole discretion of the wisher. This wish is warranted to perform as expected within the usual application of good tidings for a period of one year, or until the issuance of a subsequent holiday greeting, whichever comes first, and warranty is limited to replacement of this wish or issuance of a new wish at the sole discretion of the wisher...
Disclaimer: No trees or animals or PETA2 members were harmed in the sending of this message, however, a significant number of electrons were inconvenienced.
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Looks good, but I won't know for sure if I am offended until after my lawyer looks it over.
:D
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I'm OFFENDED!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! You had the word lawyer in your post!!!!:mad: :mad: :mad: :mad: :mad: :mad:
:p
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Originally posted by Heiliger
Looks good, but I won't know for sure if I am offended until after my lawyer looks it over.
:D
:rofl
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a simple "Happy Holidays to ya ,whenever it comes." would have done just fine. now my head hurts from reading all that. :p
oh and,
Happy Holidays to all, whenever it comes. :)
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As a polluting, irresponsible, gun toting, hyperactive, junkie with a gender complex; your wishes of good will shall be met with my attorneys.
P.S. Happy new year.
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what would be offensive in just saying: Season's Greetings?
maybe Asian people don't have any holidays around this time of year? Does anyone know?
Don't wanna leave them out, do we, maybe we should make one up...
:rolleyes:
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My friend Jack went around his English class and said merry christmas to everyone in the class. Then he said happy holiday's to the teacher, who is jewish. She asked him "Why did you say happy holidays to just me?" Some people..... :rolleyes:
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Merry Christmas
Deal with it :)
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Hope you all had a great holiday.
I was off the internet and pretty much cut off from all news for the time between Christmas and yesterday. Wow I cannot believe the news from Asia.
I am very sorry to hear about your relative over there Chairboy. I know much time has passed but there is still faint hope. My prayers are with your family.