Aces High Bulletin Board

General Forums => Aces High General Discussion => Topic started by: snakemaw on February 07, 2005, 09:59:50 PM

Title: Be nice
Post by: snakemaw on February 07, 2005, 09:59:50 PM
The German air controllers at Frankfurt Airport are renowned as a
short-tempered lot. They not only expect one to know one's gate parking
location, but how to get there without any assistance from them.

So it was with some amusement that we (a Pan Am 747) listened to the
following exchange between Frankfurt ground control and a British Airways
747, call sign Speedbird 206.

Speedbird 206: "Frankfurt, Speedbird 206 clear of active runway."

Ground: "Speedbird 206. Taxi to gate Alpha One-Seven."

The BA 747 pulled onto the main taxiway and slowed to a stop.

Ground: "Speedbird, do you not know where you are going?"

Speedbird 206: "Stand by, Ground, I'm looking up our gate location
now."

Ground (with quite arrogant impatience): "Speedbird 206, have you not
been to Frankfurt before?"

Speedbird 206 (coolly): "Yes, twice in 1944, but it was dark, -- And I
didn't land"
:rofl
Title: Be nice
Post by: SuperDud on February 07, 2005, 10:31:41 PM
LoL:aok
Title: Be nice
Post by: Anchor on February 07, 2005, 11:24:38 PM
:rofl :rofl

I'll share another...the other way.

I was with a student pilot near a small controlled airfield in North Carolina. A US Airways flight was coming in on final, and there were several GA planes in the pattern.

An aircraft had struck a deer on the runway a few minutes before (no injuries), and the USAir flight was ordered to go around and hold on a fix. The pilot did as he was told then lashed out at the Air Controller. He said, "Do you realize it cost us about $2000 every holding lap".

ATC came back on and without missing a beat and said, "Well, spend $8,000 and then your cleared to land".

I about had stroke laughing.

BTW, the ATC guy was disciplined :(

Skeeter0
Title: Be nice
Post by: Jackal1 on February 08, 2005, 05:12:00 AM
Classic. :rofl
Title: Be nice
Post by: jaxxo on February 08, 2005, 02:38:41 PM
hehe
Title: Be nice
Post by: john9001 on February 08, 2005, 04:06:51 PM
have you heard the one about the US carrier that sunk a canadian lighthouse? true story.
Title: Be nice
Post by: SFCHONDO on February 08, 2005, 04:24:06 PM
Quote
Originally posted by john9001
have you heard the one about the US carrier that sunk a canadian lighthouse? true story.


I believe the below info is what you are refering to.

"The Lighthouse Joke"
The following is being transmitted around the Internet as an event that really took place, but it never happened. It is simply an old joke like those found in popular magazines:



Believe it or not...this is the transcript of an actual radio conversation between a US naval ship and Canadian authorities off the coast of Newfoundland in October 1995. The Radio conversation was released by the Chief of Naval Operations on Oct. 10, 1995.

US Ship: Please divert your course 0.5 degrees to the south to avoid a collision.

CND reply: Recommend you divert your course 15 degrees to the South to avoid a collision.

US Ship: This is the Captain of a US Navy Ship. I say again, divert your course.

CND reply: No. I say again, you divert YOUR course!

US Ship: THIS IS THE AIRCRAFT CARRIER USS CORAL SEA*, WE ARE A LARGE WARSHIP OF THE US NAVY. DIVERT YOUR COURSE NOW!!

CND reply: This is a lighthouse. Your call.


--------------------------------------------------------------------------------

*Note: USS Coral Sea (CV 43) was decommissioned and scrapped 2 July 1993. Other ships' names appearing have been USS Missouri (BB 63) which was decommissioned on 31 March 1992 and USS Nimitz (CVN 68) which is an active ship.
Title: Be nice
Post by: Jackal1 on February 09, 2005, 12:07:35 AM
Ummm   what.....did You...................say.... ..Hondo?
 I was................watching.. ...................something. ...................





.............else.
Title: Be nice
Post by: Angus on February 09, 2005, 03:34:16 AM
Here you go, the classical lighthouse joke filmed!!!!
Enjoy :D

http://www.hugi.is/hahradi/bigboxes.php?box_id=51208&f_id=1217
Title: Be nice
Post by: Zulu7 on February 09, 2005, 10:51:03 AM
:rofl :rofl :rofl