Aces High Bulletin Board
General Forums => The O' Club => Topic started by: mars01 on April 13, 2005, 05:19:05 PM
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This may have been around already, but it is still good lol
WOULDN'T IT BE GREAT TO TURN ON THE TV AND HEAR OUR PRESIDENT GIVE THE
FOLLOWING SPEECH?
And I wouldn't care what party he represented.
My Fellow Americans:
As you all know, the defeat of Iraq regime has been completed. Since
congress does not want to spend any more money on this war, our mission in
Iraq is complete.
This morning I gave the order for a complete removal of all American forces
from Iraq. This action will be complete within 30 days. It is now time to
begin the reckoning.
Before me, I have two lists. One list contains the names of countries that
have stood by our side during the Iraq conflict. This list is short.
The United Kingdom, Spain, Bulgaria, Australia, and Poland are some of the
countries listed there.
The other list contains everyone not on the first list. Most of the world's
nations are on that list. My press secretary will be distributing copies of
both lists later this evening.
Let me start by saying that effective immediately, foreign aid to those
nations on List 2 ceases immediately and indefinitely. The money saved
during the first year alone will pretty much pay for the costs of the Iraqi
war.
The American people are no longer going to pour money into third world
Hell-holes and watch those government leaders grow fat on corruption. Need
help with a famine? Wrestling with an epidemic? Call France.
In the future, together with Congress, I will work to redirect this money
toward solving the vexing social problems we still have at home.
On that note, a word to terrorist organizations. Screw with us and we will
hunt you down and eliminate you and all your friends from the face of the
earth. Thirsting for a gutsy country to terrorize? Try France, or maybe
China.
To Israel and the Palestinian Authority. You, boys. work out a peace deal
now. Just note that Camp David is closed. Maybe all of you can go to Russia
for negotiations. They have some great palaces there. Big tables, too. By
the way Palestinians, we are no longer going to restrain Israel!
I am ordering the immediate severing of diplomatic relations with France,
Germany, and Russia Thanks for all your help, comrades.
We are retiring from NATO as well. Bon chance, mes amis.
I have instructed the Mayor of New York City to begin towing the many UN
diplomatic vehicles located in Manhattan with more than two unpaid parking
tickets to sites where those vehicles will be stripped, shredded and
crushed. I don't care about whatever treaty pertains to this. You creeps
have tens of thousands of unpaid tickets. Pay those tickets tomorrow or
watch your precious Benzes, Beamers, and limos be turned over to some of the
finest chop shops in the world. I love New York.
A special note to our neighbors. Canada is on List 2. Since we are likely to
be seeing a lot more of each other, you folks might want to try not pissing
us off for a change. Mexico is also on List 2. President Fox and his entire
corrupt government really need an attitude adjustment. I will have a couple
of extra tank and infantry divisions sitting around. Guess where I am going
to put em? Yep, border security. So start doing something with your oil.
Oh, by the way, the United States is abrogating the NAFTA treaty---starting
now. We are sick and tired of the one-way highway.
It is time for America to focus on its own welfare and its own citizens.
Some will accuse us of isolationism. I answer them by saying, "darn tootin."
Nearly a century of trying to help folks live a decent life around the world
has only earned us the undying enmity of just about everyone on the planet.
It is time to eliminate hunger in America. It is time to eliminate
homelessness in America.
To the nations on List 1, a final thought. Thanks guys. We owe you and we
won't forget.
To the nations on List 2, a final thought. Go to Hell.
God Bless America. Thank you and good night.
If you can read this, thank a teacher. If you are reading it in English,
thank a soldier!!!!!!!!!
Written By: Unknown
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Whooohooo!
Canada made a list!
We are somebody after all! :rolleyes:
RTR
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mars, thats really dumb, thats not how the real world works and you know it.
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...On that note, a word to terrorist organizations. Screw with us and we will hunt you down and eliminate you and all your friends from the face of the earth.
This is pretty old, but even so, Osama Bin Laden remains out there, unapprehended.
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Sounds like something Pat Buchanan would say.
He's a bit of a loon.
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I actually agree with almost all of that. The only part I dont agree with is just up and leaving Iraq before they are ready to provide their own security.
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let's see now.
list one...200 some odd billion dollars invested and counting.
list two...free.
penalty for thinking that your all that and a bag of chips only to find that you're the one standing on the stage in your tighty whities and even your best friends are starting to think that youve gone schitzo?
priceless.
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mars, thats really dumb, thats not how the real world works and you know it.
Really, get the fk outa here. lolh.
Reread the title, "Interesting Take". Not "Check out the Gosple" or "GW - Laying Down The Law" lol.
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I like it.
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I like it besides the part about up and leaving Iraq would make war with Iraq more pointless then it is.
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I would actually like Bush if he said that. But, we all know he wants to invade something else.
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Originally posted by RTSigma
I would actually like Bush if he said that. But, we all know he wants to invade something else.
I'm all for invading someone else...they are going to do another round of cuts to the military..so if we stayed gainfully employed..the weenies in congress can't affors to downsize us anymore.
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Heres how the speech would go:
My fellow Americans. We are pulling out of Iraq. Now the real bloodbath begins. I are the Persident. Me make decisions. Jesus lives in my head, he tell me things to do.
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I like it. Except for the fact that as soon as we cut off List 2 we would probably be called on to pay back what we owe THEM..........which would be rather expensive I'm thinking. Anyway, as the man said, its just an excercise in "what if".
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If that was the Republican stance, I'd happily vote for them for the rest of my life. Hell, I'd even let em vote for me after I died.
Unfortunately, isolationism is bad for business.
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Originally posted by mars01
Canada is on List 2. Since we are likely to be seeing a lot more of each other, you folks might want to try not pissing us off for a change.
lmao. Or what? Huh?
This fictional President is a buffoon. Though, as we're all very well aware, there is some precedent for this kind of thing.
List 2 contains countries that are too poor to support the war if they even wanted to (hence the foreign aid), and countries that don't receive any aid (so who cares), and countries that in fact send aid to this fictional President's country. Not the most brilliant thinking involved here, but there again, it wouldn't be without precedent.
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Originally posted by Urchin
If that was the Republican stance, I'd happily vote for them for the rest of my life. Hell, I'd even let em vote for me after I died.
Unfortunately, isolationism is bad for business.
Yep, it's much better for the non-rich when there are no profitable businesses to hire them and do other useless things like that...
You know what lets do away with private enterprise and "rich people" because that will make it better for the "poor people."
Hmm, wait, no, hasnt that allready been tried?
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Making enemies of the people you need to borrow $ from is dumb. Being diplomatic is $smart$. I'm glad Bush Jr is not as dumb as the author. I'm glad hes not as sissy as the unknown author also
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Originally posted by SunTracker
Heres how the speech would go:
My fellow Americans. We are pulling out of Iraq. Now the real bloodbath begins. I are the Persident. Me make decisions. Jesus lives in my head, he tell me things to do.
:rofl
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Do you guys hate your country so much, take a meaningless short term cheap thrill over the devesting effect this would have on the US's position in the world?
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Originally posted by oboe
This is pretty old, but even so, Osama Bin Laden remains out there, unapprehended.
Too much of a big deal is made of Bin Laden.
So what if he is still out there. He is just a figurehead.
You really Think the capture of Bin laden means anything other then a headline and a short lived hoorrah?
You really think that his capture will mark an end to terrorism or even Al Queda?
Capturing Bin laden will only mean we captured Bin Laden. It wont change a damn thing. Its not like if we take him the whole organisation will then surrender or fall apart
Its like cutting the flower off a dandalion. It will just grow a new one.
I personally think we already know where Bin Laden is and can get him whenever we want. But it makes more sence not to.
If we know where he is we can monitor him and his activities,communications and the people he deals with.
ad thus have a higher probability of preventing another attack
IF we get rid of him a new leader will take over from god knows where and we will have to start the hunt all over again. or worse yet the organisation divides into many splinter cells operating independantly from one another and we will have to start looking for them all over again. So instead of looking for one Binladen then we will be looking for 10 or 20.
No. we are much better off not capturing him and just watching him.
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Some one get the list of borrowed money from what countries. That would be interesting to see.
As for all you guys getting your panties in a bunch saying this is stupid and things arent like that and blah, blah, blah. This wasn't posted to change the world. It was just Interesting. :rolleyes:
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Originally posted by ASTAC
I'm all for invading someone else...they are going to do another round of cuts to the military..so if we stayed gainfully employed..the weenies in congress can't affors to downsize us anymore.
If its Mexico Im all for it.
far as I can tell Mexico is currently the greatest threat to our national security.
Canadians while sometimes annoying are for the most part harmless souls and the majority of its people can stand on their own two feet and work legally. And you dont catch many Canadians trying to sneak across our borders.
Mexico and its illegal alians are comming across and attaching themselves like leaches sucking our welfare systems dry and returning home to breed like roaches so their offspring can come here and do it some more.
Dont get me wrong. The Mexicans seem to be fine hard working people. and I have nothing against any of them comming here if they do so legally.
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When the grammar matches the content (thks gizoogle...)
Wouldnt it be bootylicious ta tiznurn on tha tv n hear our president give saggin' speech?
and i wouldnt care what party he represented.
my fellow amerizzles y-aw knizzow, tha defeat of iraq regime has bizzy completed. since
cizzles does not wiznant ta spend any mizzy money on this wizzle our mission in
iraq is completizzles morn'n i gizzy tha poser fo` a complete removal of all american forces
from iraq spittin' that real ****. this action will be complete witin 30 days. it is now time to
begin tha reckon'n.
before me, i hizzy two lists n' ****. one list contains tha names of countries that
have stood by our side ballin' tha iraq conflict. this list is short.
the united kingdom, spain, bulgaria, australia, n poland is some of the
countries listed there.
the otha list contains everyone not on tha first list. mizzy of tha worlds
nations is on tizzy list. mah press secretary wizzy be distribut'n copies of
both lists lata this even'n.
Let me S-T-to-tha-izzart by say'n tizzle effective immedizzle foreign aid ta those
nizzles on list 2 ceazes immediately n indef. tha money saved
dur'n tha first year alone wiznill pretty much pay fo` tha costs of tha iraqi
war.
the american thugz is no longa gonna pour money into third world
hell-hizzles n wizzay those government poser gizzle thick on corruption like a tru playa'. need
help wit a famine? wrestl'n wit an epidemic? call france.
in tha future, togetha wit congress, i wizzle work ta redirect this money
toward solv'n tha vex'n social problems we still hizzle at home.
on that note, a word ta terrorist organizzles . Yippie yo, you can't see my flow. screw wit us n we will
hunt you down n eliminate you n all yo *****z fizzle tha fizzle of the
earth . Aint no L-I-M-I-to-tha-T. thirst'n fo` a gutsy country ta terrorize? try france, or maybe
china.
To israel n tha palestizzle authority. you, boys and my money on my mind. wiznork out a peace deal
now. jiznust note that C-to-tha-izzamp david is closed. maybe all of you can go ta russia
for negotizzles. they have some bootylicious palaces there hittin that booty. big tables, too. by
the way palestizzles we is not longa going ta restrain israel!
i am frontin' tha immediate sever'n of diplomizzle relations wit france,
germizzles n russia thanks fo` all yo hiznelp, comrades.
we is blingin' fizzle nato as wiznell. bon chance, mes amis.
I hizzy instructed tha Mayor of New York City ta begin tow'n tha many UN
diplomizzle vehicles located in Manhattan wit more tizzy two unpaid parking
tizzles ta sites where those vehicles wizzle be stripped, shredded and
crushed. I dont care `bout playa treaty pertains ta this . Put ya mutha ****in choppers up if ya feel this.. You creeps
have tens of thousands of unpaid tickets ridin' in mah double R. Pay those tickets tomorrow or
watch yo preshizzous Benzes, ***** n limos be turned over ta some of the
finest chop shops in tha world. I love New York.
A special nizzle ta our neighbors . Aint no stoppin' this **** *****. Canada is on List 2 with my hoes on my side, and my strap on my back. Since we is likely to
be see'n a lot more of each hustla you folks miznight wizzant ta try not pissing
us off fo` a change. Mexico is also on List 2 motha ****a. President Fox n his entirizzles government really need an attitude adjustment upside yo head. I wizzill have a couple
of extra tizzank n infantry divisions sitt'n around n' ****. Guess where I am going
to put em? Yep, borda security cuz its a doggy dog world. So S-T-to-tha-izzart doing sum-m sum-m wit yo oil.
Oh, by tha wizzy tha United States is abrogat'n tha NAFTA treaty---stizzles . Aint no L-I-M-I-to-tha-T. We is sizzick n tired of tha one-way highway.
It is tizzy fo` America ta focus on its own welfare n its own citizens.
Some will accuse us of isolizzles . Ill slap tha taste out yo mouf. I crazy bellybutton ***** them by doggy stylin' "darn tootin."
Nearly a century of try'n ta help folks live a decent life around tha world
has only earned us tha saggin' enmity of just `bout everyone on tha planet.
It is tizzle ta eliminate shot calla in America. It is time ta eliminate
homizzles in America.
To tha nations on list 1, a final thought fo yo ***** ass. thanks guys like this and like that and like this and uh. we owe you n we
wont forget.
to tha nations on list 2, a final thought fo yo ***** ass. go ta hell.
god bless america ta help you tap dat ass. thizzanx n good night.
if you can read this, T-H-to-tha-izzank a *****. if you is read'n it in english,
thank a soldia!!!!!!!!!
written by dogg: unknown
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I really wish Bush have said that in a public speech.
.
.
.
I'd be laughing for days :D
Bozon
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As Mars says it is just INTERESTING. But the problem with little diatribes like that is that many people think like that and would read it approvingly. That is a problem because it is almost complete nonsense and is fundamentally inaccurate in almost ever respect. The author is obviously an ignorant idiot and was right to stay anonymous. If he was trying to be funny, he missed by a mile.
People like the author and those who agree with him exist in all countries. You cannot go to a bar or cafe without finding an armchair patriot expounding some kind of simplistic, bigoted rant against whichever foreigners, immigrants or races are in the firing line at the moment.
That's where it stays mostly except that with the advent of the internet. Some get to publish it for all of us to see. But it's just bar talk, no one should take it seriously.
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Originally posted by mars01
It was just Interesting. :rolleyes:
Not even really very interesting. The sort of "look at me im john wayne" tough guy posing is quite common. BTW john wayne was short, probably gay & a bad actor
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Originally posted by bunch
Not even really very interesting. The sort of "look at me im john wayne" tough guy posing is quite common. BTW john wayne was short, probably gay & a bad actor
And his real name was Marion Morrison.
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Originally posted by Sandman
Sounds like something Pat Buchanan would say.
He's a bit of a loon.
He WAS funny as hell when he ran for the Presidency though. Man I enjoyed that. :lol
Woof
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As Mars says it is just INTERESTING. But the problem with little diatribes like that is that many people think like that and would read it approvingly. That is a problem because it is almost complete nonsense and is fundamentally inaccurate in almost ever respect. The author is obviously an ignorant idiot and was right to stay anonymous. If he was trying to be funny, he missed by a mile.
Hey weaps! You back now?
Yeah rgr that. I do get a kick out of the guys that can't even laugh at it.
Not even really very interesting. The sort of "look at me im john wayne" tough guy posing is quite common. BTW john wayne was short, probably gay & a bad actor
please! :rolleyes:
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Originally posted by RedTop
I like it.
__________________
RedTop
71 Squadron RAF - The Eagles
Spitfire MkVb
To know God , you must expierance God.
Well... at least you can SPELL God.
Woof
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Originally posted by GRUNHERZ
Yep, it's much better for the non-rich when there are no profitable businesses to hire them and do other useless things like that...
You know what lets do away with private enterprise and "rich people" because that will make it better for the "poor people."
Hmm, wait, no, hasnt that allready been tried?
What the hell are you talking about?
As a side note... how about you guys with no location listed go ahead and tell us where you are from. That way I can ask the President whether I'm supposed to hate you or not. :lol
Woof
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Originally posted by bunch
Making enemies of the people you need to borrow $ from is dumb. Being diplomatic is $smart$. I'm glad Bush Jr is not as dumb as the author. I'm glad hes not as sissy as the unknown author also
Damn man........
Skywolf <---------------------gives up and shoots himself in the head.
Woof
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Originally posted by SunTracker
Heres how the speech would go:
My fellow Americans. We are pulling out of Iraq. Now the real bloodbath begins. I are the Persident. Me make decisions. Jesus lives in my head, he tell me things to do.
dont sniff glue!
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Originally posted by mars01
please! :rolleyes:
Originally posted by 2 guys having a picnic in in a row boat
you tell him!
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Originally posted by SkyWolf
Well... at least you can SPELL God.
Woof
What are you talking about?
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Originally posted by RedTop
What are you talking about?
Your sig has experience misspelled.
Woof
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Originally posted by SkyWolf
Your sig has experience misspelled.
Woof
Thanks...it's fixed now. :p
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I never got a paycheck from a poor man.
(Well, at least, one that didnt bounce)
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Originally posted by Urchin
Unfortunately, isolationism is bad for business.
Isolationism is bad for national security. World security too for that matter. If it wasn't for that I would be all for it.
Become one of those rich people. It's much more fun (so I've heard)