Aces High Bulletin Board
General Forums => The O' Club => Topic started by: indy007 on June 03, 2005, 04:12:41 PM
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funny stuff (http://www.theonion.com/news/index.php?issue=4122&n=10)
Summer is a great time to get outside and grill a delicious meal. Here are a few basic safety rules and outdoor-cooking tips to help make sure you and your family enjoy a tasty, safe summer cookout.
*Marinate your ribs in bourbon before barbecuing. The best way to do this is by pouring the whiskey down your throat.
*One safety tip to keep in mind while barbecuing is that you should never, ever light your house on fire.
*It's important that you choose the right kind of fire for grilling meat. Class D magnesium-based fires are not the right kind of fire for grilling meat.
*Whatever you do, don't shout the phrase "Johnsonville brats!" at the top of your lungs. Don't let your neighbors do that, either.
*Do you have an entire set of tableware designed with a playful, summery watermelon-slice theme? Well, isn't that adorable. Let me see that spoon! Even the spoon is a little watermelon. Honey, come here and look at this spoon.
*Don't forget to repeatedly baste your cooking pork in barbecue sauce, which will "mask the spoiled taste."
*The endangered Cebu cinnamon tree of the Philippines is the best firewood for grilling. Use anything less, and you might as well be cooking your food on top of smoldering raccoon crap.
*For optimal flavor, raise your own animals, make your own charcoal, and distill your own vinegar. For passable flavor, head on down to Smokey's Ribs & Things out by the airport.
*When barbecuing veggie burgers, be sure to tie your long hair back. That will keep it away from the flames, you stupid hippie.
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Originally posted by indy007
*When barbecuing veggie burgers, be sure to tie your long hair back. That will keep it away from the flames, you stupid hippie.
BWHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHAH!!!!!!!!!!1111111
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Better get marinating before I cut down that Cebu...
:aok
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*When barbecuing veggie burgers, be sure to tie your long hair back. That will keep it away from the flames, you stupid hippie.
That was the only funny part.
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Gotta love the Onion! :aok
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Originally posted by indy007
funny stuff (http://www.theonion.com/news/index.php?issue=4122&n=10)
Summer is a great time to get outside and grill a delicious meal. Here are a few basic safety rules and outdoor-cooking tips to help make sure you and your family enjoy a tasty, safe summer cookout.
*Marinate your ribs in bourbon before barbecuing. The best way to do this is by pouring the whiskey down your throat.
*One safety tip to keep in mind while barbecuing is that you should never, ever light your house on fire.
*It's important that you choose the right kind of fire for grilling meat. Class D magnesium-based fires are not the right kind of fire for grilling meat.
*Whatever you do, don't shout the phrase "Johnsonville brats!" at the top of your lungs. Don't let your neighbors do that, either.
*Do you have an entire set of tableware designed with a playful, summery watermelon-slice theme? Well, isn't that adorable. Let me see that spoon! Even the spoon is a little watermelon. Honey, come here and look at this spoon.
*Don't forget to repeatedly baste your cooking pork in barbecue sauce, which will "mask the spoiled taste."
*The endangered Cebu cinnamon tree of the Philippines is the best firewood for grilling. Use anything less, and you might as well be cooking your food on top of smoldering raccoon crap.
*For optimal flavor, raise your own animals, make your own charcoal, and distill your own vinegar. For passable flavor, head on down to Smokey's Ribs & Things out by the airport.
*When barbecuing veggie burgers, be sure to tie your long hair back. That will keep it away from the flames, you stupid hippie.
And don't forget to remind your guests before they head home, while drinking and driving always do drugs.