Aces High Bulletin Board
General Forums => The O' Club => Topic started by: Udie on November 29, 2001, 02:30:00 PM
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I don't know why I'm going to post this here, but this seems like a fun idea for a thread...
The most stupid and crazy thing I've ever done was back in December of 1989 on the first deer hunting trip of my life. I was 20 and bigtime into the late 80's hippy flashback scene. So I drive to my now roommates house in Killeen from Houston. When I get there we popped a couple of extacy tabs each :) a few hours later we head off to the camp followed shortly by another tablet of X each :) this was at about 4 am or so.
At about 5:30 while still wildly halucinating we took off for the pasture gun in hand. On the way there it was pitch black all I could see was the lights from my halucinations which didn't help matters. About 1/2 way to our hunting spot I stepped on what felt like a big tree branch on the ground. Only when I put my full weight on it, it moo'ed and ran off. heheh scared the toejam out of me.
Well at about 6 am we finaly found our spot under a live oak tree with low branches. We set up right at the stumped and smoked a joint hehe. After being there for about 20 min this HUGE buck walks from behind a tree about 200 yrds away and started eating grass in the middle of a field. My buddy was extremely cool and handed me the rifle so I could take my first shot at a real live dear. LOL I'd beed up on his neck perfect, even through the light show, and everytime I'd go to pull the trigger I'd start shaking very badly. Finaly I closed my eyes and shot. The bullet hit the ground about 5 feet behind the deer. It must have passed just under his head. Strange thing is that it didn't spook him, he just kept on eating.
My friend couldn't believe I missed and took the gun from me to take a shot. LOL the same thing that happened to me happened to him and he missed too, only this time the buck ran off :(
That's pretty stupid and crazy eh? :D Now before you go off thinking I'm completly crazy let me say one thing ;) We never lost track of reality and the fact that we had a deadly weapon with us. We unloaded the gun before we took the drugs and only took 3 bullets with us on the hunting trip :) the gun was in his hands with the chamber open and the bullets were in my pocket until we got to the tree.
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Originally posted by Udie:
That's pretty stupid and crazy eh?
yep, and you posted that here why?
ppl much younger than us 30 to 40 year old burn outs read these boards, hope none get the nod from this post to do something equally stupid.
Think I'll keep my ignorant mistakes to myself.
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Originally posted by Eagler:
ppl much younger than us 30 to 40 year old burn outs read these boards, hope none get the nod from this post to do something equally stupid.
Yes, well as someone who's younger than 30 by a few years- I'd have to say that if you take something someone says that is stupid and do it yourself, then you are just an accident waiting to happen and probably best you get Darwinised before you take more people with you.
-SW
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Originally posted by Eagler:
yep, and you posted that here why?
ppl much younger than us 30 to 40 year old burn outs read these boards, hope none get the nod from this post to do something equally stupid.
Think I'll keep my ignorant mistakes to myself.
Please dude, I've written and read much worse stuff on this board than what I just posted. What Swulf says it true :)
And I didn't say ignorant mistakes I said crazy and stupid.
Somebody top my story pls :)
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Two many to list, lets just say that I've had a gun pulled on me in anger 4 times, and fired at me 2 of those 4 times. Not kidding!
Bottom line: Alcohol and firearms DO NOT mix.
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Mine typically involved alcohol, an automobile and an age less than 25 (too many instances to list, unfortunately) -- except for a more recent one about five years ago that shows stupidity and immaturity never fully disappear sometimes. I'm happy to be alive, and even more happy others are in spite of myself.
Charon
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I once ran with scissors. And they weren't even safety scissors either! :eek:
SOB
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The most stupid and crazy thing I did was way back in 1980. I was sworn in as a deputy sheriff. :D
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I have no feeling in half of my right hand and limited movement in the pinky finger of that hand that resulted from tripping up a flight of stairs while carrying a 6 pack of Weinhard's and crushing several bottles under my hand. It wouldn't have been so bad, but I was totally sober, and I never got to drink any of the beer because they all broke. I did make sure that after I got stitched up I stopped by the bar and got the cheap drunk that can only result from loss of blood.
It wasn't crazy, but I'm pretty sure it was stupid.
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This is a great idea for a thread Udie. The young'ns might learn something from our mistakes...like........(so many to choose from)
How about the time I handed a joint to an LAPD officer at a concert. I was just trying to be neighborly! This was back in 1975 or 76, when the notorious Ed Davis was Cheif of Police. I should have noticed this guy was the only black person at a Jethro Tull concert....Live and learn :rolleyes:
Another good thread idea is to post your most embarassing moment. I definitely have a few of those. :(
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Never carry yer sack of weed in the same pocket you keep yer I.D in.
"License and registration pleeze.."
(pulls out wallet, lil baggie plops on the pavement at our feet)
"oh, chit"
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Apache,
It was 10 years ago and I don't do that stuff any more ;) thought I smelled bacon in here :eek: j/k :D
Tah Gut and Hangtime,
MAN!!!!! I would have watermelon my pants for sure. I saw a guy pass a joint to a cop once at a party. I felt bad too, just watch him do it knowing it was a cop. He got lucky though and they just ended the party.
Come on guys have fun w/ this thread it's been too heavy in here lately. I like to come here and laugh not get pissed...
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Hehehe Eagler is right!
I'm very young, and now I will buy a firearm and some LSD - hilarity will ensue!
The dumbest thing ive done probably, while obviously drunk, was to eat some strange plants that almost killed me.
I also, obviously drunk, snuck into a house and skinny dipped on their pool, then I fell asleep on their garage under a broken car. By a miracle of destiny, all the family left to work the next morning and no one noticed me there. I just woke up, got into the pool again to clean the stench of booze sex and death from me, searched for my clothes, and walked home.
Hangtime, you have to tell us what happened after the bag hit the floor, and you shat your pants.
[ 11-29-2001: Message edited by: Animal ]
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Just out of curiousity, how did you manage to hallucinate for a long period of time off of ecstasy?
It takes a good number of "today's" pills to pull that off (4 or 5 of okay ones, 2 of good ones but it only lasts for about an hour or two)...
Were the cut with LSD(I don't believe you can actually pull that off), or was it half MDA and half..... something else?
Just asking.
The fact that you guys thought you could fire a gun and actually hit something was probably stupider than doing it. My eyes would rapidly twitch back n forth too much for me to keep focused on anything. And my hands would shake too much for me to steadily hold a rifle too, I'd probably somehow manage to shoot myself in the ass.
-SW
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Hangtime, you have to tell us what happened after the bag hit the floor, and you shat your pants.
I had military ID, orders and a local california license. The traffic stop was a time-killer for him, and he had a radio call come up (saw his attention shift to patrol car) and I guess I didn't look like a bust worth of all that paperwork... my hair was shorter than his.
So; our man in blue just picked up the sack, opened it and sniffed. Since it was about 5 grams of sensimilla and bright green it didn't really smell or look 'right' to him. Not what he expected for sure..
"kid, somebody ripped you off... this toejam is oregano". He emptied the sack onto the ground (it was a sample, I had about 4 ounces of it in the van) and told me to get my tailight fixed "and get another connection."
*whew* And that was the closest I EVER came to getting tagged. :)
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hehe cool nice story dad :)
I love the "you got ripped off" cops.
they are so "IN THE KNOW"
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Had 3 kids.
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it's a long story and i don't come out too well in it.
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I know whatcha mean there, Cap'n... totin around some herb is about the least dumb thing I survived back then.
Why I'm still walkin round the planet is beyond me, and in the domain of fortune cookies and miss cleo.
..went to work drunk and stoned, nail-gunned my own hand..
..drove a duce and a half off a cliff..
..got chased around my vw by a boar i'd just hit..
..woke up inna hospital after breakin up a guy-squeak fight.. the squeak nearly killed me..
..tried to stop a falling pallet of truck parts by turning and pushing back..
..leaned up against a jeep door that wasn't there.. at 40mph..
Theres more. My bones ache thinkin about it..
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Originally posted by SWulfe:
Just out of curiousity, how did you manage to hallucinate for a long period of time off of ecstasy?
It takes a good number of "today's" pills to pull that off (4 or 5 of okay ones, 2 of good ones but it only lasts for about an hour or two)...
Were the cut with LSD(I don't believe you can actually pull that off), or was it half MDA and half..... something else?
Just asking.
The fact that you guys thought you could fire a gun and actually hit something was probably stupider than doing it. My eyes would rapidly twitch back n forth too much for me to keep focused on anything. And my hands would shake too much for me to steadily hold a rifle too, I'd probably somehow manage to shoot myself in the ass.
-SW
Swulf,
I tried to private message you but it won't let me. Could you give me your email? I don't want to post a reply here as I don't do that stuff anymore and don't want to sound like a total junky here but I defenately would like to swap some stories with ya from back in "the day" :)
hangtime,
Do we share the same DNA? Your probobly like me, knowing you will die by some stupid act you had no idea would kill you. Like getting in your car or something. :D
[ 11-29-2001: Message edited by: Udie ]
[ 11-29-2001: Message edited by: Udie ]
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Volunteering for a lurp insertion 2 weeks after "graduating" from ES classes.
Attempting to see how fast I could get from Denver to the Springs in a hemi powered Savoy set up for turn left dirt tracks. UMMMM YAAAAS to the required safety equipment, and alcoholic relaxants. (we salvaged the block and a couple tires)
With racing out of the picture maybe smoke jumping was the way to go ... NOT.
Deciding that because I was the same height and 6 lb heavier than Rocky Marciano, I too could have a pro boxing career.
Deciding to turn the third story apt of the house into a hemp farm to "get rich quick"
Then I turned 25 and I guess a couple of brain cells decided to start functioning. :)
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ok, i've thought it over and i'll tell the story.
i was 19 yrs old about 2 weeks b4 my sons first thanksgiving. i was making about $3.90
an hour and we where very broke. had no money for the dinner, and was on my way home at 8am from a 16 hour shift.
it's about 25 deg. and as i head home in the middle of nowhere i see this turkey, he's keeping warm by sunning himself in the middle of the road. he hardly moves out of the way when i go by (the road was warm from the sun so he musta been cold), so i stop about 30' past him and look in my car for options. all i have is a spool of speaker wire so i make a lasso(figuring it's a longshot but i've got nothing to lose)
i'd like to interject at this point that while we had domestic turkeys around the farm while i grew up, i'd never been exposed to wild turkeys and they are a completely different animal.
so i pop open the trunk (to stuff him in there to take him home and fatten him up).
and armed with my improvised lasso i go after the turkey, i walk up real slow like, and he starts moving away when i get about 8-10' away, so i through the wire and i actually catch him around the neck and start reeling him in, feeling very proud of myself and quite clever, and saying to myself over and over 'I GOT HIM!!, I GOT HIM!!',
things where looking bright as i reached out and grabbed him by the neck, at this point, 'i got him' quickly turned into "HE'S GOT ME, HE'S GOT ME!!! "
for those of you who've never experianced a wild turkey up close and personal like, let me tell you they are NOTHING like their domestic counterparts.
domestic turkeys are slow,dumb, easily pushed around.
wild turkeys on the other hand, have big claws, a very sharp beak, have a real fighting spirit, and there wings push enough air that when they flap there wings up against the side of your head your ears pop as if you've been slapped on the ear hard.
so here i am holding this bird by the neck my ears ringing, trying to find away to let go as he shreds my long sleved shirt up past the biceps, taking deep furrows out of my arm (kinda like i was attacked with a carrot pealer)so i manage to get away from the bird and he trots off to a feild.
i make it to my car, arm shreded and bleeding heavy.
i hate losing and i can be vindictive (not proud of it, but there it is)
so i jump the ditch in my mustang and haul bellybutton around this feild until i run over, then back over the turkey, HA I WIN. not so tough now are you, ya dumb fluff'n bird
so iget the car back on the road and make it the 40 miles home. lost about 1 1/2 cups of blood on the drive home and the car was a mess, the whole right side of me from my shoulder to my knees was covered in blood, the shirt looked like it went through a 'incredible hulk' episode, and my ears where still ringging pretty loud.
i walk in the house and the wife asks what happend.
i just said "shut up and get the peroxide and bandages"
it was about 9 months before i told her what happened and probly 10 or 12 years b4 i told anybody else.
like i said " it's a long story and i don't come out too well in it"
[ 11-29-2001: Message edited by: capt. apathy ]
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last cogent memory was seeing an assortment of beautiful fluffy white and beige powders laid before me and thinking about how good it felt to be all set for a few days.
my usual set of moocher friends were salivating for some kickdowns and saying nice things to me and handing me some purple drink and drawing the shades in paranoia.
confidently i said "hell, i could probably even mix all this sh&t, i mean that'd be fun right?...."
<insert fuzziness here>
next clear memory was wearing an open backed hospital gown dragging a toppled iv stand behind me and pissing on a wall in a hospital hallway with a cast on my arm, 15 or so stitches on one side of my head and about 10 on the other, with a freakishly swollen lip, none of my 'friends' in sight, and saying to myself:
"why the hell am i pissing on this hallway wall and what are all these people staring at?"
in fact i'm pretty sure i asked them what the hell they were staring at as well. :D
did some time in the mountains getting clean and serene after that one. still got a crooked finger though since the fool set my bone wrong - the other bones healed ok
at least. used up about 3 o' my 9 lives that night.
waking up face-down on the street next to a bus stop was another proud moment but i think i'll hold on to that one for now. i just hope no one has pictures from those days!
;)
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Check your private messages Udie.
-SW
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Originally posted by easymo:
Had 3 kids.
ROTFLOL! (give me sympathy, brother!)
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I was on a motorcycle trip with some buddies up in Quebeck/Ontario,Canada, way out in the boonies, pup-tenting our way accross the wilderness.
We were on very infrequently traveled roads, and I had gotten about ten miles ahead of my buddies. I stopped at an interesting hairpin turn in the road and set up an accident scene, with my bike layed down in the middle of the road, and me splayed out with ketchup on my head. My buddies knew I had whiskey in my canteen, so sprinkled good Canadian whiskey all around, and on my jacket.
Well, it was the OPP that came around the turn, not my buddies!
I had some 'splaining to do. :) Long story short, the cop eventually laughed about the whole thing.
I'll keep my stupidist and craziest antics to myself ;)
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[ 11-30-2001: Message edited by: Gunthr ]
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I was once a Special Education Teacher in California. This is a true and accurate account of one of our less well thought out activities.
We were on a trip to San Diego with most of our "Less developementally disabled students" which is PC speak for less retarded. One of these students was fairly high functioning, but had set phrases he would repeat whenever he was agitated or worried. These phrases included "It's Monday Hon", "Out-the-way copper", and "Scores 14 to 7". He also happened to be hispanic.
Well, someone got the bright idea to take a few of these guys shopping across the border in Tijuana. "What a great idea!" we all thought in our hippie dazed drugged out minds. And it was ok, until we brought them back across the border.
Now at that time (late 70's) the US Border Patrol used to lean into the window and look everyone in the eye asking "Where were you born?" This agitated our student for some reason, so when the officer got to him he blurted "Its Monday Hon!"
Thinking this poor kid didn't understand the question (it wasn't Monday) the BP Officer tried again. To which our student replied even louder "OUT THE WAY COPPER!" "SCORES 14 7!"
Yes, the car was sent over to the detention area. Yes, we talked our way out of the situation eventually, and Yes, everyone I worked with at the time will still double over at the mere mention of "Out the way copper".
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LOL Tah Gut- reminds me of the outing in One Flew Over The Cuckoo's Nest
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I was unfortunate enough to be witness to this extreme act of stupidity.
Camping near the lake (on fishin trip) with 2 friends and some friends of my friend I just got to know that day... campfire is lit and we're cooking some fish and joking around.
Then this moron decides to spice things up and throws a handful of bullets into the fire.
We actually RAN to the fuking lake and dove in, there was no other cover. late night, gdamn cold. popopopopopop.
The military police came over to investigate an hour after it happened. They found 1 guy with black eyes and broken nose and 6 very pissed off youngsters.
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capt apathy, thanks for making me bust a gut on a crappy day. That's the funniest toejam I've heard in a long time :D
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I jumped with the light RED at the door...
xBAT
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I had a 125 foot skid mark going UP hill before it even went into the woods and BEER everywhere, including me. "Son have you been drinking" "No sir" "Get in the car"...
xBAT
P.S. I state trooper showed up and saved my bacon as they didnt know if it was in the county or city...he was ex miltary and I had one hell of adreline rush... he let me off w/reckless driving. I'll never forget "Son you seem to be in good control of your facalities but you DID leave a 150 ft skid mark UP hill so I still gotta write you up..."
xBAT again
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I got alot more... but I'll refrain from the tempation to show how friggen stupid I could be.
xBAT
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I took a guy(6'8", 280#) that got thrown off the UL football team for being insane, on a ride.
For those of you that do not know what a ride is, it is when you take some fraternity pledges and get them drunked up and drop them off in the woods with a six pack and allow them to make their way home.
So far this isn't crazy, just stupid, but then....
The pledges, 4 of them including the monster, drank the 6 pak in a matter of minutes, then stole some more from a convience store. Now being chased by the authorities, they head cross country, through the marshes and rice fields.
A friendly guy picks them up, offering to give them a ride back to town(about 20 miles), but as it turns out, he is gay(and a school teacher). He takes them further into the woods and makes a move on them, and they beat him up a litle before he runs away.
They absolutely destroy the guys car, I mean total it, and stagger off towards town. By now the police have them located and bring them in.
Now here is the crazy and stupid(on my part) thing. I went and bailed them out. The evil look from Hanagriff(the footballplayer) told me what I had in store when they took the cuffs off and released him into my custody. Amazingly, he did not crush me like a tomato, but it was touch and go for a while.
The truly wild and crazy things that I have done, I will keep to myself, as the statue of limitations may not have run it's course on some of them.
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Hm, hallucinations on E?
Musta been some mixed up bad toejam you got Udie.
And taking mixed up bad toejam IS crazy stuff :d
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Originally posted by StSanta:
Hm, hallucinations on E?
Musta been some mixed up bad toejam you got Udie.
And taking mixed up bad toejam IS crazy stuff :d
I used to call them the squiglies they weren't like LSD halucinations. Everything bounced around leaving long thin tracers. Times 3 and you don't need a light source :)
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While we're on the subject of freaky visual chit, has anyone else ever gotten what I like to call "35mm vision"....where it seems like your looking thru the lens of a 35mm camera that is only taking like a picture a second? Kind of like the video card in your head doesn't have enough ram :)
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in the old days we called that a 'strobe light' effect