Aces High Bulletin Board
General Forums => The O' Club => Topic started by: vega on December 18, 2000, 11:11:00 AM
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Normally, the Dickweed Heavy Bomber Group does not release information from its squadron intelligence files to the public. However, if a growing public crisis is detected, our intelligence staff will sometimes de-classify selected DHBG reports.
It appears that RBS (Ritual Butt Shaving, which started as a relgious ceremony among the Knights and certain Knight squadrons, has now spread to the Rooks and many of their squadrons. (source: DHBG Intel Reports 00-65399873 and 00-112094746)
DHBG Intelligence revealed that last night there was a huge RBS ceremony at Rook Headquarters involving members from over 20 Rook organizations. Evidently, many butts were shaved and RBS is spreading rampantly among the Rooks.
Religious shaving of the buttocks is an ancient practice going back to the middle ages where it was used among certain monastical orders as a rite of passage for novitiates. The biggest danger of RBS is that it rapidly leads to more bizarre and kinky behaviour, according to authorities quoted in DHBG Intel files.
There have been no instances of RBS among the Bishops, and the DHBG is working hard to keep it that way.
This report has been released solely in consideration of the public welfare and not to publicize the DHBG or its services.
/s/
vega
Dickweed Heavy Bomber Group www.bombergroup.com (http://www.bombergroup.com)
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And, if you find someone like me with no hair on his butt, then what is the ritual? Or should I even ask?
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I'll testify to Rip's assertion.
We tried, but he waxes.
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ROTFLOL!!!
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(http://www.harrier.net/iguana/images_photos/22_07.JPG)
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Why is Funked shaving that guys ass?
Yeager (http://bbs.hitechcreations.com/smf/Smileys/default/wink.gif)
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(http://www.naysayers.com/glunz-.gif)
Ve vill get you Muschtang boy!!!
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I've figured it out! It's from being assigned the bottom-right corner of the beta map. You get your butt waxed so often the only defense is preemptive shaving!
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DHBG Intelligence
Inter-Office Memo
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Update:
Two more outbreaks of RPS (ritual butt shaving) have been reported, early this morning, in the Knight sector of the map at their HQ complex. Religious or ritual butt shaving apparently originated in eastern Europe and spread through the monastic system over the entire continent in less than 100 years.
Largely dormant during the industrial revolution, RPS was re-popularized in Russia by the monk Gregory Rasputin and found great favor in the seminary schools of the U.S. after World War I. Former Reich Marshal and Luftwaffe Chief Herman Goering was a well known afficianado of the practice. Among the more famous contemporary butt shavers are former Gov. Jerry Brown of California, Senator Charles Schummer D-NY, and talk show hosts Rosie O'Donnell and Geraldo Rivera.
News of a recent butt shaving incident at the White House has been largely suppressed by the media.
<end of memo>
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Originally posted by Yeager:
Why is Funked shaving that guys ass?
Yeager (http://bbs.hitechcreations.com/smf/Smileys/default/wink.gif)
Lol. Doesn't the "shavee" look like Gore? (http://bbs.hitechcreations.com/smf/Smileys/default/smile.gif)
[This message has been edited by mietla (edited 12-18-2000).]