Aces High Bulletin Board
General Forums => The O' Club => Topic started by: Naytch on October 22, 2005, 10:01:05 PM
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...I ask the ah community.
I'm thinking of asking this girl out next week (this week is exams). It'll be semestral break so I'm gonna have to do it on the phone.
Any advice? It'll be my first try askin a girl out, so I'm in the dark here. I don't live in a country where there're cool restaurants to eat in (in this place they're eighther too expensive, or they're McDonald's). I'm thinking about the movies, there's one nearby. But, there aren't many appropriate movies coming out these days; Deuce Bigolo, Doom, and lots of native language movies, which she won't understand.
My uncle is willing to help me out for the date itself (if she should say 'yes') but, I'm still in the dark on how to ask her.
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I don't ask many girls out but go with something like "Hey I was wondering if you wanted to go do something on ..... with me." I'm no ladies man but it's better then "HEY! WANNA ****!?"
Oh and you could also rent a movie and watch it at your place if you wanted.
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uhhh you're asking a BBS fulla men who play at being fighter pilots and have probably not seen, much less spoken to a woman outside of pr0n sites and 900 nbrs?
good luck wit' dat!
oh wait.... listen to all the suggestions....
then ignore them as being no good. :aok
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Well first things first. Dont listen to Shane on romantic advice,because EVERYONE here knows he cries himself to sleep everynight while hugging his pillow from lonliness.
Call her and scream into the phone "Waaaaaazzzzzzaaaaa!"
be sure to tell her about your best sortie.
Anything she says. look into her eyes, and say yes occasionally. or I would never have thought about it that way, or how insightful.
circa 20 minutes later, if you brought some wine along you should be banging it like a caveman.
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How to Pick up Girls by Rolex.
First, you go up to her and say this: "Hi. Can you do me a favor?"
She will say yes, because everyone says yes. Then tell her something like this: "I know this sounds strange, but I wanted to ask your advice about something. I really don't have anyone to ask... I want to ask this girl out, but I'm not sure what to say or where to take her."
She'll probably laugh... keep going - it's a good sign.
"Really, I'm serious! You must get asked out all the time, so I thought you'd be an expert on this. What do you think I should say?"
There is a 99% chance she'll tell you to just go talk to her.
"I'd be happy just talking to her, but I don't know where to go. Do have any ideas? Help me! Please! Hahaha!"
As long as she is smiling, you're good to go. Have fun on your date!
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Asking a new girl out is a crap shoot.
Sometimes they say yes and sometimes no.
If she says no DO NOT take it personal as there are millions of girls your age in the world..
Most fellas have to go to bat a whole lot before they get a home run LOL.
But when asking her do so with confidence as chicks hate the wormy type .
Be strong polite and direct and if she says no then ask her if she has any friends that might want to catch a movie lOL that drives em nuts.
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Nothing to it.. just ask her as you'd ask any of your other friends.
blah blah blah.. i heard about this awsome movie.. balh blah blah.. Its a must see... eveyone is talking about it.. blah blah blah...
wanna go see it?..blah blah blah. :)
Movie is a cool place for a first date..its dark and someone else does the entertanment for ya.
after the movie, you'll have a common topic to discuss.. :) :)
If things go well, maybe she'll let you give her an extra sneaky castro or portugese breakfast. :rofl
Best of luck! let us know how it went.
P.S. Deuce Bigalow 2 is awsome.
:rofl
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Originally posted by fartwinkle
if she says no then ask her if she has any friends that might want to catch a movie lOL that drives em nuts.
LOL! that's a pretty good idea.
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Originally posted by Callisto
If things go well, maybe she'll let you give her an extra sneaky castro or portugese breakfast.
That doesn't even sound good Callisto, you sick freak.:rofl
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Not enough information as to what country or local customs there. My first date worked out like this.
I pledged a high school fraternity and while a pledge often made trips to Dauphin Island, where one of the senior members' parents had a house. I often would walk up the beach to the Holiday Inn (about two miles) for exercise and because as a pledge I was forbidden to drink and had to do something to keep from being bored.. Didn't drink anyway so that was no biggie.
On one of these walks I met an 18 year old girl at the poolside at night. She was a nice girl, but I was 15 and didn't have a driver's license. Didn't tell her that, but I was ready for a date (some incidental peer pressure from the frat.) First thing I asked was did she have a boyfriend. She said she didn't (she liked me.) I asked her out for pizza and she said yes.
Now the thing was, she thought I was older than I was, and after having to go on several double dates in someone elses car, she became suspicious. She was pissed when I told her my age, because I had kissed her a couple times (awkwardly, another give-away.) My frat brothers said this would happen and to be ready for grief. It wasn't to be because of the age difference. But that was the first date where I asked a girl out and she was really interested. After that, getting a driver's license was top shelf priority for me. Though it was too late, and most of the girls I asked out after that didn't compare.
But for first dates, ya can't go wrong with bowling, putt-putt golf, sporting events etc, where there's people around in a public setting. Kinda gives an atmosphere of relaxation for both parties, and a "sizing up", so to speak, of the other person's character. See if you're compatible for instance, topics of conversation and such. If she laughs then you're halfway there.
Dinner, movies, is more adult, and used as a date more than you think to avoid conversation and getting to know someone better. Never for a first date.
Good luck!!!
Les
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Ya know, I was kind of laughing when I first read this, but then I thought what the heck, I didn't have anyone to ask when I ventured out so why not.
42 years old here, married 18 years, mind you, to the same woman, which in this day and age is saying something!
Dude, trust me, don't try so hard. Be yourself, they will like you or they won't.
If you want to take her out, tell her so, simple as that. There is no trick, no line, no BS that anyone worth a crap is going to buy into. Now, here is the tough part, if a Line or some BS DOES work, you don't want her.
James Bond is good for the movies and books. Don't try too hard. If she is worth being with, she is worth being yourself with. The point of a good relationship is simply being comfortable being with them.
Now, as for "how" to do it, simply call her up and say that you want to spend some time with her. Mini Golf, a movie, McD's or whatever, you just want to spend the free time you have with her. I'm betting that a sandwich and sitting on a park bench will be just fine.
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Yeah what ROC said, be yourself, if she likes you great, if she doesn't, what the hell. There are tons of girls.
P.S> congrats on 18 years to the same woman ROC, always good to see a couple that can stick it out.
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IMO just do it...the worst she can say is yes...err no. Basically what ROC said. Be yourself and have fun.
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Thanks guys. I'm confident that I can act natural around anyone - from a complete stranger that insists on talking with me on a bus, all the way to the evil principle. The problem is she is very shy, so anything I say might put her off or make her uncomfortable, u know?
To make things worse: I live in a third world country so there's no such things as parks, mini-golf (which I miss dearly) or sporting events. To make it even more inconvenient is that transportation is far below average here. If we wanna go anywhere far, we have to : walk long distance in the polluted sidewalks, the smelly train, or crowded jeepney.
Thankfully she lives near a mall, so that's why it's eighther restaurant or movies.
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Cash always works for me!
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where do you live? mogadishu?
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I first kissed them... then I didn't need to ask.
The joys of underage drinking & too loud music, not much thinking or talking required. In fact I can't recall ever just asking any of them straight. If I was generally friendly and attentive, and the mood and situation was right, it all came by itself. :D
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Try to throw in a complement or two as you ask her out. Something about how you think she's nice and would she like to go on a date with you.
If she says no, gently follow-up with something like "maybe another time?" and see what she says. If you at least get a maybe, then just ask her again in another couple of days or try to get a general timeframe from her (next week, tomorrow, after some event, etc).
As for what to do, public events are good. Local fairs, etc. Maybe a museum, the zoo, aquarium, etc. Find out what other people do on dates in your area, but don't get caught up doing romantic stuff on the first few dates. Just try to find something to do that will not put her on the defensive wondering when you're going to "make your move". That means if you go to a movie, sit in the middle or up front, not in the back, so you're not tempted to do something stupid like grab a feel or something and she's not worried that you'll do something stupid like that. Holding her hand in the scary parts - that's cool especially if you see her hands jumping, but don't push it.
Anyhow, back to just asking, I wouldn't recommend being too cute about it. Just try to work in a complement and ask straight out. You should have in mind what you want to do so if she says yes, you can ask her about your date plan. "yes". "great. I thought it might be fun to go to the roller rink" "No, I lost my foot to a land mine". "oh, I'm sorry. How about go-karts and miniature golfing?" "Great" "Can I pick you up at 5? We can be home by 10 if you have a curfew" "yea sure" "See you then!"
When you pick her up, have a single flower to give her so she can hold and fiddle around with it in case you have any "uncomfortable silences" on the way to whatever it is you're going to do.
Just some ideas.
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It sounds as though you have two problems in your post:
1) How do you go about asking her out.
2) Where should you take her.
As to answer number 1, Honesty with no B.S. is always the best policy. If you're shy about asking her, TELL HER that your shy about asking her when you do ask her out. If you try to lay on even a thin layer of B.S., she'll see right through it. I've seen alot of clients use the honesty approach very successfully when I was a bartender.
As to answer number 2, not knowing where you live...its difficult to answer. If movies are not possible due to the language barrier, then how about a beach with a couple of kites? Musuem tour? The whole point of a first date is to promote conversation and get to know each other alittle more. Movies don't cut it..since you can't talk much during a movie. I'd recommend finding something to do that can be fun, that both of you haven't done in quite some time, or something you did when you were younger that you really enjoyed, and do something where you both can talk while doing it. (No, not sex...that doesn't count! ;) )
Regardless of what you do, being honest to her about your anxiety of asking her out can be beneficial to the relationship. Just don't tell her you went to a Flight Sim bulletin board for this advice...that part I'd definately lie about! :D
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IMHO what Roc said is right ON!
Be who you are! Always be who you are. It will save you hugh amounts of trouble later!
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You mean huge don't you Wrag?:D
Les
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Originally posted by Leslie
You mean huge don't you Wrag?:D
Les
OOPS YA thanks :lol
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Just say : "voulez vous coucher avec moi ce soir ?"
She can have one of those reaction :
[list=1]
- she think "he speak French ,it's so romantic" ... and you can start a good romance.
- she speak french (at least enought to understand this sentence) the last think you will see his her fist coming to your eye :).
[/list=1]
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It's too bad you aren't a bit older. When I lived in Toronto my first date place was the racetrack (horses).
They had a "Jockey Club" at the track that you could pay to eat in. It was decked out like a really nice restaurant with monitors at each table and a huge glass window overlooking the track. When the horses ran past the place you could watch 'em live and then when they got on the other side of the track you could see the close up action on the monitors.
The food was so-so and was a buffet, but it really didn't cost any more than a simialr level restaurant in the city.
The beauty of the place for first dates would be:
1. No awkward silences...there was always something to talk about...ie which horse to bet on for a given race.
2. Excitement. If a woman bets two dollars on a horse to win and it does so she is thrilled. Even if it doesn't win but was in contention she had fun. There was always about 10-12 races. Odds are she will pick one.
3. The girls always thought I had taken them someplace very special. This is because while ALOT of people go to the track most of them sit in the stands. Because I escorted them to an "exclusive area"..the Jockey Club they felt special.
It worked like a charm.
I even married one of the girls I took there for our first date. :aok
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Just be Honest and be yourself, if she likes you she'll say yes, and remember, dinner is always good, but a movie isn't the only thing girls like. Girls like to dance, see new things >etc< Girls also like to talk and get to know the person they're on a date with. Maybe a bike ride and a picnic?
Just don't try to get in her pants on the first date, and if she goes to kiss you kiss her back.
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Lots of good advice has been offered in this thread.
Be and act confident even when you are nervous. You will be surprised how often a girl will go out with you if you ask, but its assured you wont ever date a girl if you dont try to ask her out.
Be yourself as advised, dont act in a manner you normally wouldnt. When with a girl, pay attention to her, listen when she talks, and dont talk a lot about yourself. If you have a cell phone, leave it at home. If she asks about a phone, tell her you left it at home so it wouldnt distract you.
Eagls comment about a compliment is dead on. Girls (and most all people) really like getting a compliment when offered sincerly. It helps establish good rapport.
Dont spin your head to look at other girls as they walk by.
Just be nice, they will respond to that.
good luck
dago
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Deuce Bigolo is a great date movie.
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Say this...
Guy: You know you have 206 bones in your body?
Girl: Blah blah blah
Guy: Want another ?
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Originally posted by nirvana
I don't ask many girls out
Me either, last time I did the wife got a bit ticked.
shamus
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Originally posted by BlueJ1
Say this...
Guy: You know you have 206 bones in your body?
Girl: Blah blah blah
Guy: Want another ?
I really hop eyou have a better pickup line than that
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there are many ways to go about this..
first is the one that won't work
"hey sweet thing, can i buy you a fish sandwich"
you will get a no...
2nd. Hey wanna catch a movie?
you will either get a sure which is all down hilll from there
or a no at which you reply, fine b**ch i don't like you anyway and you look fat in those pants.
then you go get her best friend and ask the same..rinse and repeat :aok
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Well, any news?
A lot of good advice. Another good thing I've found... don't feel pressured for the good night kiss spit-swap on the first date. If it happens, great. If not, then there's a backup plan that's almost better. Get the 2nd date set up, and then kiss her at the first opportunity on it(in your case, hopefully as soon as she's away from parents).
Relieves the tension, and they love it. If they're on a second date with you, they're almost guaranteed to want some kiss action.
You're at a great age. Enjoy it... preferrably with as many good girls as possible.
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Naytch, just wondering, where do you live?
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Originally posted by Dago
Lots of good advice has been offered in this thread.
Be and act confident even when you are nervous. You will be surprised how often a girl will go out with you if you ask, but its assured you wont ever date a girl if you dont try to ask her out.
Good advise there.
Women in general are attracted more to strong confident men then weak wishy washy ones.
And by Strength I dont mean physically strong as women are more mentally attracted to someone then physically.
As A woman I once saw said. "A strong and confident man has the same effect on a woman as a large pair of breasts have on a man"
That doesnt mean be arrogent. Just be sure of yourself, what and who you are.
Just Be yourself and make em laugh.
Like I said. just be yourself and the person that everyone else likes about you. And dont try to fake anything.
A movie is a good idea for a first date but plan something for both before and after. Gives you a chance to talk and get to know one another.
In the movie while it will give you both something in common to talk about afterwards you wont be able to talk much during.
So plan on something short before hand. Cup of coffee perhaps or even a walk through a park or a museum.
afterwards maybe some food. Even at a local pizza joint or Diner.
Go to an itallian resturant. Food there is usually pretty cheap and often has a nice setting.
you culd flip the two around and get some food first then the movie then the walk. Or afterwards take her for some Ice cream for deseart. Which also isnt a bad idea.
If the chick is only interested in expencive resturants and high end stuff then she probably is High maintanence and probably not worth it in the long run anyway.
Parties is a REAL bad idea for a first date.
Too much going on. and you want the two of you to be the center of your focus.
Be attentive but dont fall over yourself going overbored.
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Originally posted by Tarmac
Well, any news?
You're at a great age. Enjoy it... preferrably with as many good girls as possible.
there is somethign to be said for "Bad Girls" as well.
so long as you dont become hung up on them :D
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Originally posted by megadud
there are many ways to go about this..
first is the one that won't work
"hey sweet thing, can i buy you a fish sandwich"
you will get a no...
2nd. Hey wanna catch a movie?
you will either get a sure which is all down hilll from there
or a no at which you reply, fine b**ch i don't like you anyway and you look fat in those pants.
then you go get her best friend and ask the same..rinse and repeat :aok
And guys wonder why their still single, with no girlfriend.
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Originally posted by dmf
And guys wonder why their still single, with no girlfriend.
And some sadly are borne lacking the sense of humor gene.
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Thats because some of us are sick of hearing those sex implying ancient male bonding high five to your buddy pick up lines :)
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I'm probably the only guy on this BBS who not only will admit I declined offers for sex from girls when I was in highschool--but is proud of that fact. I never dated except to find a future spouse, and as such I wanted nothing to do with sluts. I despise the run-around attitude that so many people display nowdays. Fortunately I met my wife before I was out of highschool, so at least I didn't have to put up with the even worse college-age dating scene.
From my experiences with dating, it seems that most girls out there now only really want sex. Apparently "equal rights" just means leading a potato's life without getting paid for it...seems like a raw deal if you ask me. They're too stupid to want anything better until they're 28 and have two kids by different men and are locked into a crap life. Few girls are raised with any class anymore. Most are too dumb to appreciate things like opening the door for them or treating them with respect. Some will yell at you if you do it (avoid those future liberal feminist wenches).
When you ask a girl out, just be direct--"hey, do you want to go to soandso". Most girls will give a guy a chance. If you feel like you have to "trick" her into saying yes with a silly ploy, just find someone else.
Don't ask out a girl who already is involved with someone. Doing that is a good way to get you or your property (or both) harmed by someone like me who doesn't like spineless scumbags who do that sort of thing.
J_A_B
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Originally posted by straffo
Just say : "voulez vous coucher avec moi ce soir ?"
She can have one of those reaction :
[list=1]
- she think "he speak French ,it's so romantic" ... and you can start a good romance.
- she speak french (at least enought to understand this sentence) the last think you will see his her fist coming to your eye :).
[/list=1] [/B]
3. She thinks "another damn fool quoting song lyrics".
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Originally posted by J_A_B
good post. well said.
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Originally posted by J_A_B
I'm probably the only guy on this BBS who not only will admit I declined offers for sex from girls when I was in highschool--but is proud of that fact. I never dated except to find a future spouse, and as such I wanted nothing to do with sluts. I despise the run-around attitude that so many people display nowdays. Fortunately I met my wife before I was out of highschool, so at least I didn't have to put up with the even worse college-age dating scene.
From my experiences with dating, it seems that most girls out there now only really want sex. Apparently "equal rights" just means leading a potato's life without getting paid for it...seems like a raw deal if you ask me. They're too stupid to want anything better until they're 28 and have two kids by different men and are locked into a crap life. Few girls are raised with any class anymore. Most are too dumb to appreciate things like opening the door for them or treating them with respect. Some will yell at you if you do it (avoid those future liberal feminist wenches).
When you ask a girl out, just be direct--"hey, do you want to go to soandso". Most girls will give a guy a chance. If you feel like you have to "trick" her into saying yes with a silly ploy, just find someone else.
Don't ask out a girl who already is involved with someone. Doing that is a good way to get you or your property (or both) harmed by someone like me who doesn't like spineless scumbags who do that sort of thing.
J_A_B
Where were you when I was looking LOL
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Originally posted by dmf
Where were you when I was looking LOL
Better question.
where were all those girls that only wanted sex when I was looking?
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Jeez, I never knew I'd get this much advice LOL
Thanks guys, I appreciate the help. For the ppl who asked I live in the Philippines (and can't wait to leave).
I'm asking her out on saturday - exams are this week so next week is semestrial break. Again, thanks for the suggestions fellas! Probably we can hit the mall for a pizza and a movie? or the other way around?
There arnt any museum tours around here, aside from that thing where they talk about Rizal (phil 'natnl hero) which is a huge bore, not to mention a two hour ride from her place. There are lots of Karaoke around here, but since each of them are dominated by tagalog speaking drugys, she won't like that.
Again thanks for the help guys, I really appreaciate it.
P.S Deuce Bigolo IS a great date movie ;)
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Phillipines, can't you take a ride to the beach? That might be more of a second date type thing though. Pizza and a movie sounds good, either way. I'd recommend a comedy for the first date, who doesn't like a good laugh? Besides you get to see what kind of sense of humour each of you has.
Don't worry, be yourself, you'll be fine:aok
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The beach? that's a six hour ride! Sorry, I don't have enuf money for the cab fare.
Anyway, I'll check the newspaper if ther're any good comedies in theatres this week.
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Ahhh nevermind then:) Good luck bro
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I had casually heard that this girl I had my eye on lost her Liz Phair CD, within days I had downloaded and burned.. then printed out a case cover that was exactly like the album, but I added her name to.. I came out looking great and blow her panties off.. 2 years later we're still fighting.
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LOL SHANE!!! You took the words right outta my mouth!