Aces High Bulletin Board
General Forums => The O' Club => Topic started by: SHawk on January 09, 2006, 06:32:02 PM
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The following is forwarded not to offend tennis, basketball,
football or soccer fans. It is, rather, an attempt to put everything
in its proper perspective.
Ever wonder why golf is growing in popularity and people who don't
even play go to tournaments or watch it on TV? These truisms may
shed light.
Golf is an honorable game, with the overwhelming majority of
players being honorable people who don't need referees.
Golfers don't have some of their players in jail every week.
Golfers don't scratch their privates on the golf course.
Golfers don't kick dirt on, or throw bottles at, other people.
Professional golfers are compensated in direct proportion to how
well they play.
Golfers don't get per diem and two seats on a charter flight when
they travel between tournaments.
Golfers don't hold out for more money, or demand new contracts,
because of another player's deal.
Professional golfers don't demand that the taxpayers pay for the
courses on which they play.
When golfers make a mistake, nobody is there to cover for them or
back them up.
The PGA Tour raises more money for charity in one year than the
National Football League does in two.
You can watch the best golfers in the world up close, at any
tournament, including the majors, all day, every day for $25 or
$30. The cost for a seat in the nosebleed section at the Super
Bowl will cost around $300 or more.
You can bring a picnic lunch to the tournament golf course, watch
the best in the world and not spend a small fortune on food and
drink. Try that at one of the taxpayer funded baseball or football
stadiums. I brought a Coke into Oriole Park at Camden Yards last
year, and an usher came to my seat and told me I had to dispose
of it, or I would not be allowed to stay in the stadium.
In golf you cannot fail 70% of the time and make $9 million a
season, like the best baseball hitters (.300 batting average) do.
Golf doesn't change its rules to attract Fans.
Golfers have to adapt to an entirely new playing area each week.
Golfers keep their clothes on while they are being interviewed.
Golf doesn't have free agency.
In their prime, Greg Norman, Arnold Palmer and other stars, would
shake your hand and say they were happy to meet you. In his prime
Jose Canseco wore T-shirts that read "Leave Me Alone."
You can hear birds chirping on the golf course during a
tournament. Ladies are welcome players.
At a golf tournament, (unlike at taxpayer-funded sports stadiums
and arenas) you won't hear a steady stream of four letter words
and nasty name calling while you're hoping that no one spills beer
on you.
Tiger Woods can hit a golf ball three times as far as Barry Bonds
can hit a baseball.
Golf Courses don't ruin the neighborhood.
Finally, here's a slice of golf history I thought you might enjoy.
Why do full-length golf courses have 18 holes, and not 20, or 10
or an even dozen? During a discussion among the club's membership
board at St. Andrews in 1858, one of the members pointed out that it
takes exactly 18 shots to polish off a fifth of Scotch. By limiting
himself to only one shot of Scotch per hole, the Scot figured a
round of golf was finished when the Scotch ran out. Now you know.
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Golf is for sissies and guys who wear funny pants.
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ironic that the sport of gentlemen was invented by Scotsmen.
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It helps to wear shorts when speed golfing.
Carts are for guys with beer bellies and/or drunken jousting.... not that I would do such a thing.
Don't forget the #1 attraction of golf. Stripper golf tournaments. Haven't been to one? Try Wildcats (the course, not the club) in Houston for St. Patrick's Day. I'd post the pics, but I'd just get banned.
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Ha....some of those are pretty good.
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of course, some of those points suck.
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Isn't everyone forgetting that Golf is another four letter word and the second leading cause of strokes?
SWING - WHIFF - "****!"
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When the term "a fifth" was popularized, it was in referrence to a fifth of a gallon (128 fl oz and a fifth being 25.6 fl oz).
So there are approximately 25 shots (from a 1 oz shotglass). The remainder is the liquid that one drinks from the bottle to finish it off.
Shouldn't a round of golf be 25 holes then? Even if they were drinking doubles it'd be ~ 13 holes to the round.
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Ya gotta luv Golf.
Where else can ya get out of the house for 5-6 hours with the guys,
drive a motorized beer cooler/bumpercar/dragster, and smack the hell out of things with Clubs, and gamble.
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Used to play 5 - 6 times a week.
Now 5 - 6 times a month.
Love to play though. :)
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Toad , Most shots are not 1 oz (even though that is the ideal for some) its more in the range of 1.4, 1.5 - 1.7 ish. What are the mini bottles 1.7oz? thats the normal idea of a shot, not a stupid lil gily standard of 1 oz. :aok
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Sure, I agree with ya. But 25.6/18= 1.42oz.
Accounting for spillage, was a Scotsman's "shot" about 1.3 or 1.4 oz? For that tale to be true, there has to be some "standard" shot for a Scot.
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I like golf, even though I suck at it. ( I need to find a course that has a lot of par 8s and 9s)
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Golf is like sex.
You don't have to be any good at it to actually enjoy it.
:D
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Professional golfers are compensated in direct proportion to how well they play.
In golf you cannot fail 70% of the time and make $9 million a
season, like the best baseball hitters (.300 batting average) do.
Not really. Most PGA players consider their endorsement deals as their "salary". This is their fixed income. Tournament winnings is considered a bonus to their salary.
You can bring a picnic lunch to the tournament golf course, watch the best in the world and not spend a small fortune on food and drink.
I am not aware of any PGA event that lets you bring food or drink onto the property. Most LPGA events no longer allow it as well.
I do agree that nearly all PGA golfers are class acts. Even guys that appear to be jerks on the course (Norman, Stadler) are very personable off the course. With exception of Singh and Woosnam. Singh is a robot, Woosnam is an bellybutton 24/7.
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Originally posted by SHawk
Why do full-length golf courses have 18 holes, and not 20, or 10
or an even dozen? During a discussion among the club's membership
board at St. Andrews in 1858, one of the members pointed out that it
takes exactly 18 shots to polish off a fifth of Scotch. By limiting
himself to only one shot of Scotch per hole, the Scot figured a
round of golf was finished when the Scotch ran out. Now you know.
Snoped (http://www.snopes.com/sports/golf/18holes.htm)
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Golf is like sex.
You don't have to be any good at it to actually enjoy it.
yes, this is true, but also the better you are at "it" the more fun you can have.:D
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:D