Aces High Bulletin Board
General Forums => The O' Club => Topic started by: Spatula on January 14, 2001, 03:48:00 PM
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ARE YOU AN AMERICAN? Test
1. You decide that the relationship with your partner is over. How do you
break the news you are leaving?
(a) Leave a tearful note on the table and slip quietly away
(b) Calmly discuss the reasons for your decision with your partner
(c) Attack them with a chair in front of a rabble of cheering pumped-up
inbreds on national television.
2. You and your mates decide to have a game of football in the park. What do
you need to take?
(a) A ball
(b) A ball and 2 coats
(c) A ball, 50 crash helmets, 4 tons of body armour, 20 cheerleaders, a
marching sousaphone band with a grand piano on a trolley, and a team of
orthopaedic surgeons specialising in spinal injuries.
3. You are driving along a country road when you accidentally run over a
rabbit. What do you do?
(a) Stop and see how badly injured it is, taking it to a vet if it is still
alive
(b) Carry on driving, but hope it is still alive, or if not, that it died
quickly
(c) Strap it across the bonnet of your car and drive home hollering,
whooping and throwing empty Budweiser cans out of the window.
4. You wake up in the morning with a stiff neck after sleeping in an awkward
position. What do you do?
(a) Ignore it. It will probably loosen up as the day progresses
(b) Take a couple of aspirins and get on with things.
(c) Take yourself to a prostitute-addicted TV evangelist faith healer in an
ill-fitting wig, who will lay his hands on your head, whilst screaming about
the devil in front of an audience of gibbering inbreds.
5. What do you have for breakfast?
(a) A bowl of Cornflakes, slice of toast and a mug of tea
(b) Glass of orange juice, croissant and a cup of coffee
(c) A bag of donuts with ice cream, a 32 ounce steak with six eggs sunny
side-up, fifteen pancakes with maple syrup, ten waffles, five corn dogs and
a diet root beer.
6. You and your partner decide to take the plunge and get married. What sort
of ceremony do you have?
(a) A quiet party with a few friends in a registry office
(b) A church service followed by a traditional reception at a hotel
(c) A minute long mockery at a 24 hour drive-through chapel in Las Vegas,
presided over by a transvestite vicar dressed as Elvis.
7. Your 14-year-old son is going through a difficult phase, becoming
disruptive at school and reclusive at home. What do you do?
(a) Don't worry. Its just a phase and will pass.
(b) Encourage him to get out more, get involved in team sports or join a
youth club.
(c) Take him to an armoury and buy him an arsenal of semi-automatic weapons
and enough ammunition to slaughter a small town.
8. You fancy a night in watching something funny on TV. What kind of comedy
do you choose?
(a) A sitcom like Fawlty Towers or Father Ted
(b) A sketch show like the Two Ronnies or the Fast Show
(c) A thinly disguised morality play set in a massive lounge where the
audience whoop for ten minutes every time an overpaid actor with a
superglued grin on his face makes an entrance to deliver a lightweight
wisecrack.
9. Whilst getting ready for bed, you stub your toe on your wife's dressing
table. What do you do?
(a) Shout and swear a bit, after all, it did hurt
(b) Make a mental note to move the table so it doesn't happen again
(c) Immediately call a hotshot lawyer with an uptown reputation, and sue
your wife's ass.
10. You are responsible for the USA's presidential electoral process. Do
you:
(a) Count all votes and declare a winner
(b) Count all votes and declare a winner
(c) Let the press declare who's won before the votes are counted; then count
only the votes which have been handed in by a deadline whilst not checking
if Bud, the hillbilly sheriff of nowheresville, has left several thousand
votes in the trunk of his Chevy 'by mistake'; then force a recount of only
some of the votes within just one state and allow only 12 seconds for the
recount to take place; then be amazed that the recount hasn't finished by
the deadline and increase the deadline by another 3.2 seconds; then ignore
all votes and let 4 judges decide the result, making sure the judges all
support the same candidate; then ponce around the world telling other
countries how to run their own elections.
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Yes.
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Man, that rabbit was good eatin!
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the trick with the rabbits is to let them sit on the asphalt for a while and simmer a bit..but keep yer pitchfork ready in case another car comes along and tries to ruin yer dinner.
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Did you get this test out of Cosmopolitan Spatula?
American men are only allowed to take tests from this magazine and Easymo and Fatty are in big trouble if they get ratted out.
Fatty, didja eat the skin?
I need a glove.
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When did they put this thing in here and WTF is it for?
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11. Some foreigner insults your country in a public forum. Do you:
(a) Act like a gentleman and ignore the insult.
(b) Acknowledge the writers right to free speech.
(c) Write your Congressman and successfully lobby to have all trade and foreign aid cut off to the offender's country. Then sit back and laugh like hell when their economy collapses.
(http://bbs.hitechcreations.com/smf/Smileys/default/biggrin.gif)
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LJK_Raubvogel
LuftJägerKorps (http://www.luftjagerkorps.com)
(http://www.luftjagerkorps.com/images/logo.gif)
[This message has been edited by LJK Raubvogel (edited 01-14-2001).]
[This message has been edited by LJK Raubvogel (edited 01-14-2001).]
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Easy, Raub. (http://bbs.hitechcreations.com/smf/Smileys/default/wink.gif)
Them NZ were plenty happy to see us not all that long ago. Just like all the rest of 'em that find it so easy to scorn us now.
What a difference just 50 years makes, eh?
Ever been to the Punchbowl in Hawaii? Great place for folks like him to visit.
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<edit>
[This message has been edited by StSanta (edited 01-15-2001).]
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Originally posted by StSanta:
<edit>
[This message has been edited by StSanta (edited 01-15-2001).]
Dang, seconds too late, that reply would have pleased me, I know (http://bbs.hitechcreations.com/smf/Smileys/default/wink.gif)
Saw
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Yeah Saw, Santa is loosing strenght.
Where is the old mastiff???
We want Satan/Santa Back !!
(http://bbs.hitechcreations.com/smf/Smileys/default/biggrin.gif)
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What's sad is that we, as Americans, must sit back and listen to this kind of drivel and chuckle.
What's even worse... as a white American hetrosexual mid-30's male, I have to sit back while every group on the face of the earth ridicules me.
<sigh>
I guess its just disappointing how many people really want to jump in and stir the pot. Your post was not apreciated Spatula.
AKDejaVu
[This message has been edited by AKDejaVu (edited 01-15-2001).]
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Spatula must be an American, he shares our disgust . There is a bilboard in our town that says "who's the father ? 1-800-dna test"
I guess I'm just old fashioned .
[This message has been edited by Suave1 (edited 01-15-2001).]
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Why you ungrateful foreign wretches!
<blur sits back in his favorite chair, stokes up his pipe and reminisces>
How soon they forget. Do lend lease pee forties ring a bell? Ay?
We didn't want the guldern things either but that's not the point. Anyway, the Hayabusas weren't a problem as long as you kept your speed up……
I'm now thinkn' Mitchells. Remember? I believe it was spring '43. I'm talkn' about those babies with the field-mod fuselage tank with the extra shackles for the beer runs. Even my at my age I'm sprouting wood thinkn' bout those 8 gook-plinkers in the nose. Short memory again ay?
What about the spam, nylons, Betty Grable posters…
…candy bars……..ungrateful……..
<blur nods off>
<several minutes later the psychiatric ward nurse comes by and puts out the pipe>
(http://bbs.hitechcreations.com/smf/Smileys/default/tongue.gif)
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Originally posted by AKDejaVu:
What's sad is that we, as Americans, must sit back and listen to this kind of drivel and chuckle.
What's even worse... as a white American hetrosexual mid-30's male, I have to sit back while every group on the face of the earth ridicules me.
<sight>
I guess its just disappointing how many people really want to jump in and stir the pot. Your post was not apreciated Spatula.
AKDejaVu
You can change your nationality to whatever you want you will always find someone to made jokes about you or your country .
After all I'm an arrogant snails/frogs eater (don't forget the stinky cheese and the garlic (http://bbs.hitechcreations.com/smf/Smileys/default/wink.gif)) and I don't joke about the people I hate (http://bbs.hitechcreations.com/smf/Smileys/default/smile.gif)
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Originally posted by AKDejaVu:
What's sad is that we, as Americans, must sit back and listen to this kind of drivel and chuckle.
What's even worse... as a white American hetrosexual mid-30's male, I have to sit back while every group on the face of the earth ridicules me.
<sigh>
I guess its just disappointing how many people really want to jump in and stir the pot. Your post was not apreciated Spatula.
AKDejaVu
[This message has been edited by AKDejaVu (edited 01-15-2001).]
And, concurring with what straffo say, If you want to see a wonderful example of misrespect and plain ignorance (and lack of interest to solve it), you can grab a ticket and take a look at the average "Historic" Hollywood product. Not to talk about any move which action is located in any latin country. Can you spell undocumented topics?. Maybe if we non-americans didn't learn to laugh at ourselves we could even get angry. Just like you (http://bbs.hitechcreations.com/smf/Smileys/default/wink.gif)
Cheers...and easy, man
Pepe
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http://bbs.hitechcreations.com/smf/Smileys/default/Forum1/HTML/007423.html (http://bbs.hitechcreations.com/smf/Smileys/default/Forum1/HTML/007423.html)
AH General Discussion, Topic: "Gulf War Pilot May Have Survived Shoot Down"
Blur: "This is nothing but a scam perpetrated by the pilots family (with some inside help no doubt) to dip their grasping little fingers into the public welfare trough.
Always insightful commentary. (http://bbs.hitechcreations.com/smf/Smileys/default/wink.gif)
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And, concurring with what straffo say, If you want to see a wonderful example of misrespect and plain ignorance (and lack of interest to solve it), you can grab a ticket and take a look at the average "Historic" Hollywood product. Not to talk about any move which action is located in any latin country. Can you spell undocumented topics?. Maybe if we non-americans didn't learn to laugh at ourselves we could even get angry. Just like you (http://bbs.hitechcreations.com/smf/Smileys/default/smile.gif)
I've been to 8 Latin American countries. I've never used Hollywood to judge them. The strange thing is, while most foreigners deplore the way Hollywood represents their country, they use it to judge America like its some kind of absolute truth. Ironic to say the least.
Hollywood is full of misrepresentation and the media is nothing but sensationalism. That applies to every country everywhere around the world.
AKDejaVu
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Deja,
My point was not about judging a country, or pointing out who ridiculous use to be your cinema's representation of foreign countries, but being able to laugh at what others think about one's. I find Spatula post quite funny, bearing in mind that is a non-offensive, joke post. It makes me sad when somebody reacts with angry to these kind of things. Of course you are entitled to respond if you feel somehow insulted, but I think (IMHO) you just overreacted here.
Cheers, (http://bbs.hitechcreations.com/smf/Smileys/default/smile.gif) (the always usefull smiley)
Pepe
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I didn't intend any anger in my posts. No insults were hurled.. in jest or otherwise.
I just grow tired of these types of jokes.. thus the sigh.
Yes they are funny... to a point. Yes they can be over-used. I guess the point I'm getting at is that I have to maintain a "sense of humor" whenever anyone talks about America on this board.
It just gets old.
AKDejaVu
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Jez, it was a *joke* - you know, haha...
Jokes almost invariably poke fun at someone, thats why people find them funny.
And as to the comment that we NZ's were only too happy to see the Americans in WW2 i find that insulting. We didnt sit on on our tulips waiting for the great americans to save our puny asses. That comment insults me, all those valiant kiwis and Aussies that gave their lives against all but overwhelming odds. Sure, i cant argue that the americans didnt help, but the americans had to stop the japanese to protect *their* interests in the pacific, not a completly altruistic motive.
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Originally posted by AKDejaVu:
I guess its just disappointing how many people really want to jump in and stir the pot. Your post was not apreciated Spatula.
AKDejaVu
I wasnt trying to offend you, but if your offended i apologise.
[This message has been edited by Spatula (edited 01-15-2001).]
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Originally posted by Suave1:
Spatula must be an American
hehe, nup.
<-- chk the sig.
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I tell you what I'M getting sick of around ALL BB's lately, is an extreme lack of the ability to laugh at oneself.
While predictable, I found Spatula's post entertaining.
If you really get your nose bent out of shape reading toejam like that, they sell copies of "The Reader's Digest" at almost any grocery store. You'll really like "Life In These United States" and "Humor In Uniform."
The day I think some Kiwi would be afraid to poke fun at me, my country, and my way of life, is the day I'll just lock myself in my house, turn off the power, and learn to play the flute.
Ease up everybody. This is high-dollar comedy, and remember, COMEDY IS NOT PRETTY!
I think it was hilarious. I like to laugh at myself. I'm not omnipotent, and neither is anybody else in this world.
Jesus DejaVu, are you really serious? I was having fun in the bombsaway forum with an Australian, and some idiot from over here actually APOLOGIZED for me! It was like, "Please pardon this American Moron, we're not really all like this. <sigh>, such children!"
Oh Gawd, please.
Oh, and spatula, you don't throw beer cans out the window on the way home from a road-hunting trip.
You use bottles, and you chuck them at signs and mailboxes. Also anyone riding a funny-looking bicycle wearing spandex. And anyone who looks like their underwear is a couple sizes too small...
Mk
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Honestly, guys, grow a little skin.
Heck, that's an amusing tale.
A year and a half ago I had the opportunity to travel with a bunch of Cypriots to Syria. We spent a day in Lebanon to see the massive ruins of ancient Heliopolis (now Baalbeck) -- out between the Lebanon and the Translebanon. To get there you have to drive past massive signs showing the Israelis to be America's baby-butchering toadies. We also got to see some fine-quality S. African-made artillery batteries, Zsu-23 positions, mechanized infantry locations, and every variety of Soviet-built tank made in the last 50 years. Some of these camps had Lebanese flags; others Syrian ones; others still those of the Hezbollah.
So we get to Baalbeck, check it out. Afterwards, I go into a store, and buy a coke for a single US dollar bill. The person selling it to me does so in English, then adds at the end an insult in Arabic.
I smile and think to myself "Scoreboard"
(trans. for non-amurricans: that's shorthand for "Let us animadvert to the status of our respective countries in the current geopolitical situation.")
In short: right now, if you're a white american adult male, you have no reason to get pissed off about international insults. Whether you like it or not, you rule the world. It's only the little dogs who lift their hind legs high to piss.
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Jesus DejaVu, are you really serious? I was having fun in the bombsaway forum with an Australian, and some idiot from over here actually APOLOGIZED for me! It was like, "Please pardon this American Moron, we're not really all like this. <sigh>, such children!"
Hmmm.. seems like you may have a problem understanding that not everybody finds the same thing funny. In this case, I did not find this funny.
No need to come here and apologize for ME. ...oh wait.. that only sucks when someone thinks they have to do it for you.
AKDejaVu
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In short: right now, if you're a white american adult male, you have no reason to get pissed off about international insults. Whether you like it or not, you rule the world. It's only the little dogs who lift their hind legs high to piss.
Dinger,
Are you serious? I don't even know how to respond to this.
Maybe its because I don't view the rest of tthe world as little dogs.
AKDejaVu
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Yes, I am serious, and no, I don't view the rest of the world as little dogs. The point is, a good deal of hostility towards folks from the US is a result of the fact that, in many senses of the expression, we run the world. If you recognize this, you can take a lot of the stuff thrown at you in stride. Yes we're nuts, but what makes it scary is that we're the richest and most powerful nuts out there. Everyone's gunning for americans, so we catch a lot of toejam. Big deal -- that's part of running the world. There's no reason to be insecure when you're the most powerful out there (to make you feel otherwise is the object of so-called terrrorism).
Of course, it is my duty to inform you that US policy is ethically obscene, but that's not for any of us to determine. AFter all, we aren't free to establish our own foreign policy.
[This message has been edited by Dinger (edited 01-15-2001).]
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A mad dictator takes over most of the world. Some cowardly nations ally with him, some cowardly nations fight him and lose, Some cowardly nations stay neutral and help support his war effort.
You are safly on the otherside of a huge ocean with food, resources and land abundant. The non cowerdly nations get stomped.
Do you
A) Build a big enough fleet, Airforce and army to defend yourself and maybe protect your hemisphere. And let those other guys lamet their own stupit lack of forsight or planning.
B) Strike up a bargain with the bad guy..
C) Poor your blood and treasure into freeing the world of this mad man, then ensure a lasting peace by being magnaminous in victory.
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Wow, we run the world?
I thought China did, everything I buy lately seems to be from there.
Spatula, ya left somethin' out of number nine.
Not only would I sue her bellybutton into next year, I would also sue the manufacturer of the offending piece of furniture and the store that sold it to her.
I never liked that damned dressing table and it was WAY overpriced.
Fatty, still waiting to see if you still got the bunny pelt or didja eat this one too?
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When did they put this thing in here and WTF is it for?
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Spat,
So they weren't happy to see us? (http://bbs.hitechcreations.com/smf/Smileys/default/wink.gif)
I made no comment, positive or negative, on the NZ or Australian war effort.
None.
You are reading something into that from your own personal bias.
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Eh eh eh, nice flamefest. (http://bbs.hitechcreations.com/smf/Smileys/default/smile.gif)
But I know, you can do better !!
(http://bbs.hitechcreations.com/smf/Smileys/default/biggrin.gif)
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Originally posted by Toad:
Spat,
So they weren't happy to see us? (http://bbs.hitechcreations.com/smf/Smileys/default/wink.gif)
I allready answered that. I just hate it when some people think that the americans were the only and unstopable mega-force in WW2. Kiwis, Aussies, and brits had been fighting the japanese in the pacific well before the americans showed up. The americans did very little until their own naval base was attacked.
Originally posted by Toad:
Them NZ were plenty happy to see us not all that long ago. Just like all the rest of 'em that find it so easy to scorn us now.
So does this mean i have no right to post a *joke* on a "less serious topics forum"? The americans helped in the pacific and the *allies* won.
And what does "just the like the rest of them" comment mean? who else are you insulting? everyone who is not american?
"find it so easy to scorn us now." I wasnt scorning anyone - it was humour (not even by my pen)
Originally posted by Toad:
You are reading something into that from your own personal bias.
My bias? Maybe so, i get the feeling your are too.
Originally posted by Toad:
Ever been to the Punchbowl in Hawaii? Great place for folks like him to visit.
Please enlighten me as to what the punchbowl is.
"place for folks like him", there you go again with your 'us and them' attitude again.
Im not really a bigot, just a stubornly argumentative (http://bbs.hitechcreations.com/smf/Smileys/default/wink.gif)
[This message has been edited by Spatula (edited 01-16-2001).]
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the sad fact is pongo is 100% correct... its amazing what you can learn when you read history books written by a non-american author.
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Spatula. How long did NZ fight alone against the Japanese. Pearl was almost the first target in the war in the pacific...Was NZ hit befor Pearl harbour? In the first 15 hours of the war in the pacific the US was attacked at Pearl and the Philipines. Over 2000 men where killed. How many Kiwis died in the first 15 hours? How many Brits? How many Auzies. Have you even read anything about it?
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Loser, did you read the same reply from Pongo that I did? One of us isn't understanding what he said.
It is amazing how how big some people's chips can be. Its also amazing how often someone shows up to try to knock them off.
Spatula, the amount of people that think we save NZ's bellybutton in WW2 is comparable to the the amount of people in NZ that resent the idea that the US was an unstopable mega-force in WW2. Both groups solely exist because of the other.
Americans have a tendancy to forget who stopped the advances of Japan and Germany during WW2. Many others tend to forget who pushed them back. Is one effort greater than the other? I don't think so.
So... why do jokes like Spatula's bother me after a while? Because behind every joke is an undertone. Its amazing how quickly the author of a friendly joke gets defensive and starts slamming views of US participation in WW2. If you are going to tell a joke, and get upset because people don't maintain a sense of humor about it.. you'd better be prepared to maintain a sense of humor yourself.
AKDejaVu
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Guys !!! Guys!!!
I think we're straying here, to everyone who is everyone no matter what your country of origin.
1/ for those countries who got involved in WW2 THANK YOU for helping the WORLD to rid itself of Hitler
2/ for those countries involved in any other armed conflict in the last 200 years
THANK YOU
SO MUCH
Now it was a joke i'm sure of it but lets put the shoe on the other foot here.
ARE YOU A BRIT TEST
1/ you want end a relationship, do you
a/ leave a note slip quietly away
b/ sit down and discuss where it has gone wrong
c/ Murder her in cold blood, disppear, reappear to got on TV to appeal for her killer to come forward;.
2/ you and your mates want to play football in the park
what do u take
a/ a ball, 2 coats and bottle of drink
b/ a ball, 2 coats, a bottle of drink and your g/f to sit and watch
c/ a ball, no coats 3.5 litres of strong ciser half your street and a large lump of marajuana.
3/ you are driving along a country road and you run over a rabbit what do u do:
a/ stop, to check its ok
b/ stop, move it to the road side to die peacefully
c/ stop, stop?! what's that?
4/ you wake in the morning with a stiff neck what do u do
a/take saspirin and get on with things
b/ignore it
c/take the next 3 months of work saying it's stress related.
5/what do u have for breakfast
a/cornflakes 2 slices of toast cup of tea
b/ croissant, cappucino
c/ a slice of last nights left over pizza, and a cigarette
6/you and your partner decide to get married what sort of ceremony is it?
a/one with beautiful church ,flowers ,sunshine
b/ quiet registry office with best mates as witnesses
c/invite whole family to small chuech get everyone into the social club afterwards where warm sandwiches and even warmer beer are served, get drunk and tell the mother in law what you really thibk of her.
7/ your 14 yr old son is being disruptive at school
a/ ignore him its just a phase
b/ speak to teachers and him to sort it out
c/ buy him a playstation and take him out to TGI fridays for a slap up meal and then sy just as you've finished eating "you must try harder at school son" he says "i will"
8/you want a quiet night in in front of the TV waht comedy do u wanna watch
a/ a comedy like fawlty towers
b/ vintage morecombe and wise
c/ a comedy about an old man who is very horrible and makes eveyones life a misery , and moans about just about everything.
9/ whilst getting ready for bed you stub your toe on your wifes dresser do you
a/ swear and hobble around hoping the pain will ease
b/ swear loudly and throw the dresser across the room
c/ swear loudly and cry, spend the next three hours at the hospital convinced its broken.
10/you are responsible for the election of the next british govenrment do you:
a/ ask the people and have a ballot and elect a government
b/ ask the present government who they think should go in
c/ get the two leaders of the party for a mashed potato wretling bout 2 falls or a submission.
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PapaEcho
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"Pull the pin and count to what??"
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ARE YOU AN ITALIAN TEST
1/ you want end a relationship, do you
a/ leave a note slip quietly away
b/ sit down and discuss where it has gone wrong
c/ Go take her in your car with a beautiful blonde, and when she enter the car say "this is my NEW girlfriend".
2/ you and your mates want to play football in the park
what do u take
a/ a ball, 2 coats and bottle of drink
b/ a ball, 2 coats, a bottle of drink and your g/f to sit and watch
c/ a ball, stabs and chains to solve the question about the penalty soon or later has to be called.
3/ you are driving along a country road and you run over a rabbit what do u do:
a/ stop, to check its ok
b/ stop, move it to the road side to die peacefully
c/ stop, exit the car and check if there is damage, then spit on that SOB (same has to be done for humans victims too).
4/ you wake in the morning with a stiff neck what do u do
a/take saspirin and get on with things
b/ignore it
c/Start thinking you are going to die and make a complete check up using the public wellfare's money.
5/what do u have for breakfast
a/ cornflakes 2 slices of toast cup of tea
b/ Sausage, eggs, orange juice.
c/ No less than 10 espresso, nothing else.
6/you and your partner decide to get married what sort of ceremony is it?
a/one with beautiful church ,flowers ,sunshine
b/ quiet registry office with best mates as witnesses
c/invite whole family, friends, even people meeted along the way for a minimum of 300 people (better if you are more than thousand) to small church, rent a rolls royce for the bride, then make a no less than 6 hours party in an expensive restaurant getting drunk, singing, and crashing everything, for a total expense amount of no less than 30.000 US$ equivalent.
7/ your 14 yr old son is being disruptive at school
a/ ignore him its just a phase
b/ speak to teachers and him to sort it out
c/ Speak with the mafia local boss, your boy has quickly found a job
8/you want a quiet night in in front of the TV waht comedy do u wanna watch
a/ a comedy like fawlty towers
b/ vintage morecombe and wise
c/ A stupid sit-comedy with recorded public laughs.
9/ whilst getting ready for bed you stub your toe on your wifes dresser do you
a/ swear and hobble around hoping the pain will ease
b/ swear loudly and cry, spend the next three hours at the hospital convinced its broken.
c/ swear loudly and throw the dresser across the window, then beat the squeak.
10/you are responsible for the election of the next italian govenrment do you:
a/ ask the people and have a ballot and elect a government
b/ ask the present government who they think should go in
c/ elect the one offering more.
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Spat,
I don't want to hijack your "joke" thread. I will address/answer your questions from your last post in a new thread, "The Pacific War".
As far as this thread, I will stand back and let DejaVu's commentary speak for me as well. I think he's covered my reaction pretty well and I can't add anything to his replies.
Pongo also hit the bullseye in both of his posts. Very well said and to the point. Thanks.
[This message has been edited by Toad (edited 01-16-2001).]
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LOL! Good one, Spatula (http://bbs.hitechcreations.com/smf/Smileys/default/biggrin.gif)
Don't mind my fellow Americans on this board. There's plenty more who would find this quite funny (http://bbs.hitechcreations.com/smf/Smileys/default/smile.gif) Many Americans actually do have a sense of humor - even for themselves (http://bbs.hitechcreations.com/smf/Smileys/default/wink.gif)
To my fellow grumpy Americans: Aren't you guys a little young to be acting like snotty, old men? (http://bbs.hitechcreations.com/smf/Smileys/default/wink.gif)
[This message has been edited by leonid (edited 01-16-2001).]
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Kudos to the Kiwis, the Italians, and the Brits on this board that seem to have a sense of humor.
Additional thanks to the Americans that seem to be able to laugh at themselves and the world.
Maybe sometimes the problem is that the shoe fits too well, eh?
And as far as this "we saved your ass" crap, and the "you waited until the last minute to do diddly" stuff, man, this is about the 4th UBB where I've seen this fight.
There was a big war. A lot of people died. It changed the world. We are on the same side. Repeat as necessary until you grasp the concept.
Yep, the Italian and British representatives on this board seemed to understand perfectly. As a further demonstration as to how one handles a post like Spatula's, I give you:
SLOGANS CURRENTLY BEING CONSIDERED BY THE NEW ZEALAND GOVERNMENT TO INCREASE TOURISM:
1. "New Zealand - We're Almost As Much Fun as Australia! Well, Kind Of!"
2. "New Zealand - Not Just For Sheep Anymore!"
3. "You'll Love Us! - We Used to be Owned by Britain Too!"
4. "You'll Love Us! - We Subjugated a Native Population Too!"
5. "We Need Your Money! - We'll Act Like We Don't Have a Sense of Humor if we Have to!"
6. "New Zealand - Buy us a Drink, And We'll Tell You About How, For Brief Moments in the History of the World, we Actually Contributed to the Overall Good of Humanity!"
7. "New Zealand - We've Got New Jersey Beat All to Hell!"
8. "Kiwi's - The Animal, Not the Fruit! (And No, You Can't Shoot Them!)
9. "New Zealand - Visit Us, or We'll Come Over There!"
10. "New Zealand - Working Towards Someday Making Your NZ Vacation a Tax-Exempt Charitable Contribution!"
And finally:
"New Zealand - Proud Home of the Lucy Lawless Museum!"
There. That's better.
: )
Mk
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Kudos to the Kiwis, the Italians, and the Brits on this board that seem to have a sense of humor.
Modify that to.. "Kudos to the Italians and Brits that have offered introspective commedy commentary in regards to their own country". That's maintaining a sense of humor.
Less kudos to those that took the liberty to tell jokes about another country then get defensive when theirs is brought up.
AKDejaVu
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Most common street sign in New Zealand
(http://www.hitechcreations.com/pyro/sign.jpg)
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Nathan "NATEDOG" Mathieu
Art Director
HiTech Creations
-=HELLFIRE SQUAD=-
".... And on the eighth day, God created beer. "
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Oh my, so NZ is the REAL bishland!!!
(http://bbs.hitechcreations.com/smf/Smileys/default/biggrin.gif)
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Thanks Nate, you reminded me that I forgot one!
"New Zealand - Where The Men are Men, and The Sheep Are Nervous!"
Mk
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Quite a storm i stirred up (http://bbs.hitechcreations.com/smf/Smileys/default/biggrin.gif)
Sorry, if i came across too defensive, or offended anyone, it wasnt my intention at all. My last reply was 1:00 in the morn and was tired.
I do get defensive, and so should all of you, about your own country. <S>
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"New Zealand - Just Like Disneyland Except Without All the Exhibits, the Epcot Center, and All the Fun Rides!"
Mk
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Spatula: I thought it was funny. (http://bbs.hitechcreations.com/smf/Smileys/default/smile.gif)
Natedog: Where'd you get that picture of Vulcan's driveway?
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The egocentrism of some collectives' individuals is simply incredible.
(better this way, funked? (http://bbs.hitechcreations.com/smf/Smileys/default/tongue.gif))
[This message has been edited by RAM (edited 01-16-2001).]
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RAM, a collective can't have an ego. Crawl back in your hole again.
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Hehe RAM (http://bbs.hitechcreations.com/smf/Smileys/default/biggrin.gif)
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I'm sorry, Nate, but that street sign is ALL wrong.
The farmer is supposed to be wearing the boots, and the sheeps hind legs are supposed to be in the boots.
Obviously they do it different in Texas. ;-)
Redcoat
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Hey Sleeman, you are right, we do do it different in Texes.
The signs have a cow on 'em.
This here is Cattle Country and the only sheep here are Nuewes and they are in the HTC stables where they are guarded 24/7 by a crew imported from San Francisco to ensure not a single sheep escape into the countryside.
I am not sure where HTC gets 'em but I hope they look around for a cheaper supply so we don't have to keep payin' 30 bucks forever.
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When did they put this thing in here and WTF is it for?
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*Jay quietly munches humble pie*
[This message has been edited by Jay_76 (edited 01-17-2001).]
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Leonid said:
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To my fellow grumpy Americans: Aren't you guys a little young to be acting like snotty, old men?
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Was that a snotty old men joke? Better not be a snotty old men joke! Us snotty old men get real nasty when we're joked about.
GronK