Aces High Bulletin Board

General Forums => The O' Club => Topic started by: Swoop on January 31, 2006, 01:46:21 AM

Title: Deep thought question of the week.....2
Post by: Swoop on January 31, 2006, 01:46:21 AM
If dolphins are so bloody clever how come they never invented fire?

(http://www.onpoi.net/ah/pics/users/209_1137109117_20029211530-0-swoop.gif)
Title: Deep thought question of the week.....2
Post by: Nilsen on January 31, 2006, 01:56:16 AM
How do you know they didnt?
Title: Deep thought question of the week.....2
Post by: SOB on January 31, 2006, 02:12:31 AM
'Cause they know it won't do them any good underwater.  Apparently they're smarter than you.  :p
Title: Deep thought question of the week.....2
Post by: Pooh21 on January 31, 2006, 02:25:16 AM
if I saw a dolphin invent fire, I would plug him too as that is unnatural. Besides he was coming right at me
Title: Deep thought question of the week.....2
Post by: VOR on January 31, 2006, 05:06:29 AM
Once dolphins figure out how to hold weapons, we're screwed.
Title: Deep thought question of the week.....2
Post by: B@tfinkV on January 31, 2006, 05:19:28 AM
nice swoop, subtle wit.


dolphins can scan us and see if we are sick with thinngs like cancer and broken bones.  they do it to they prey to get the choice cuts.



having been in the sea with multiple dolphins, a very lucky experience, i would certainly say they are as smart, or smarter than us.  you wont make them happy grabbing their dorsals fins though i was told by a haggard old sea dwelling woman who showed us the dolhps.
Title: Deep thought question of the week.....2
Post by: SMIDSY on January 31, 2006, 06:10:14 AM
i got a better question:

Why is store-purchassed lemonade made with artificial flavors and dish soap made with real lemons?
Title: Deep thought question of the week.....2
Post by: B@tfinkV on January 31, 2006, 06:17:43 AM
you ever tried washing yourself with store_bought lemonade?
Title: Deep thought question of the week.....2
Post by: Nilsen on January 31, 2006, 06:29:49 AM
Quote
Originally posted by SOB
'Cause they know it won't do them any good underwater.  Apparently they're smarter than you.  :p


How do you know that they havent found a way? :furious
Title: Deep thought question of the week.....2
Post by: Pooface on January 31, 2006, 06:32:21 AM
well i swam with dolphins quite a few times, and i can tell you they are ****ing smart. its almost like they can read your thoughts, and tell what mood you're in. humans are naturally inventive, thats our nature. just because dolphins aren't so innovative dont mean they aren't smart. and bat, when you swim with dolphins, if you hold onto the dorsal fin only, their tails will break your bones, they're very strong. if you want to hitch ride, you put left hand on pectoral fin, and right hand on dorsal, so you are off to the side
Title: Re: Deep thought question of the week.....2
Post by: capt. apathy on January 31, 2006, 06:34:49 AM
Quote
Originally posted by Swoop
If dolphins are so bloody clever how come they never invented fire?

(http://www.onpoi.net/ah/pics/users/209_1137109117_20029211530-0-swoop.gif)


'cause they can't take it with them into space anyway.

"so long, and thanks for all the fish"
Title: Deep thought question of the week.....2
Post by: SMIDSY on January 31, 2006, 06:37:30 AM
Quote
Originally posted by B@tfinkV
you ever tried washing yourself with store_bought lemonade?


yes, twice.

here is another one for you:
If a cat always lands on its feet and buttered bread always lands butter side down, what would happen if you tied buttered bread on top of a cat?
Title: Deep thought question of the week.....2
Post by: Nilsen on January 31, 2006, 06:40:43 AM
Quote
Originally posted by SMIDSY
yes, twice.

here is another one for you:
If a cat always lands on its feet and buttered bread always lands butter side down, what would happen if you tied buttered bread on top of a cat?


You would get an excellent sammich if you put another piece of buttered bread on its belly?
Title: Deep thought question of the week.....2
Post by: gear on January 31, 2006, 07:02:01 AM
Quote
Originally posted by B@tfinkV

i would certainly say they are as smart, or smarter than us.  


I guess your right on that part. You don't see them with nucular weapons do you.
Title: Deep thought question of the week.....2
Post by: storch on January 31, 2006, 07:29:59 AM
I like dolphins, especially grilled.
Title: Deep thought question of the week.....2
Post by: DREDIOCK on January 31, 2006, 07:49:33 AM
Here's a new deep thought question for ya.

What if there were no hypothetical questions?
Title: Deep thought question of the week.....2
Post by: Nilsen on January 31, 2006, 08:33:33 AM
Quote
Originally posted by DREDIOCK
Here's a new deep thought question for ya.

What if there were no hypothetical questions?


thats just sick

ewww
Title: Deep thought question of the week.....2
Post by: B@tfinkV on January 31, 2006, 08:46:16 AM
Quote
Originally posted by SMIDSY
yes, twice.

here is another one for you:
If a cat always lands on its feet and buttered bread always lands butter side down, what would happen if you tied buttered bread on top of a cat?



quite clearly the cat wouldnt fall off anything untill it had licked all the butter from the bread, thus negating the problem.
Title: Deep thought question of the week.....2
Post by: VOR on January 31, 2006, 09:46:27 AM
Quote
Originally posted by SMIDSY
If a cat always lands on its feet and buttered bread always lands butter side down, what would happen if you tied buttered bread on top of a cat?


1. Levitation
2. Improbability Drive
3. Yeah, like you could tie buttered bread to a cat....
Title: Deep thought question of the week.....2
Post by: Maverick on January 31, 2006, 10:57:59 AM
Dolphins DID invent fire. The islands of Hawaii are the result of some of their best attempts
Title: Deep thought question of the week.....2
Post by: xrtoronto on January 31, 2006, 12:12:12 PM
Would it make a difference if you used 'butter', or, 'I can't believe it's not butter', on the bread you tied to the cat?

AND, would the cat know the difference?
Title: Deep thought question of the week.....2
Post by: Curval on January 31, 2006, 12:30:58 PM
Quote
Originally posted by xrtoronto
Would it make a difference if you used 'butter', or, 'I can't believe it's not butter', on the bread you tied to the cat?

AND, would the cat know the difference?


Parquet!
Title: Deep thought question of the week.....2
Post by: Airscrew on January 31, 2006, 12:43:37 PM
Quote
Originally posted by Curval
Parquet!


BUTTER !!
Title: Deep thought question of the week.....2
Post by: USHilDvl on January 31, 2006, 02:38:36 PM
How does one 'invent' fire, anyway?

Q. What would happen if you tied buttered bread to a cat, while falling?
A.  Instant space-time anomaly...a very loud bang...and both disappear, leaving a faint,oily wisp of smoke




Oh, yeah....PARQUET
Title: Deep thought question of the week.....2
Post by: Hangtime on January 31, 2006, 02:45:19 PM
Quote
Originally posted by gear
I guess your right on that part. You don't see them with nucular weapons do you.


Nope. and without air support or a viable land force, you'd think they'd need 'em to avoid extinction.
Title: Deep thought question of the week.....2
Post by: xrtoronto on January 31, 2006, 03:26:18 PM
A couple years ago I watched a very good documentary on dolphins; It was probably National Geographic or PBS or something. I remember one scene where they painted a single bright circle  on the side of the dolphins near the tail.
There was a large 12x12 mirror in the corner of this dolphin tank and the dolphins would go over to the mirror and line up horizontal then arch their tail in closer so they could have a good look at what was painted there. The narrator said this demonstrated ego awareness, which is only in 'higher thinking' primates. (maybe I'll google this and see if I can find it)



here's a link I found (http://tursiops.org/dolfin/guide/smart.html)
(I like the 'dolphin scam' !!) :t
Title: Deep thought question of the week.....2
Post by: gear on January 31, 2006, 05:39:06 PM
Quote
Originally posted by storch
I like dolphins, especially grilled.


They taste like tuna
Title: Deep thought question of the week.....2
Post by: Pei on January 31, 2006, 07:18:56 PM
So Long, and Thanks for All the Fish
Title: Re: Deep thought question of the week.....2
Post by: Holden McGroin on January 31, 2006, 07:23:59 PM
Quote
Originally posted by Swoop
If dolphins are so bloody clever how come they never invented fire?

(http://www.onpoi.net/ah/pics/users/209_1137109117_20029211530-0-swoop.gif)


It's against NFL rules.
Title: Deep thought question of the week.....2
Post by: icemaw on January 31, 2006, 08:01:18 PM
Quote
Originally posted by VOR
Once dolphins figure out how to hold weapons, we're screwed.
wasent there a simpsons episode where dolphins took over the world!
Title: Re: Deep thought question of the week.....2
Post by: Sandman on January 31, 2006, 08:01:57 PM
Quote
Originally posted by Swoop
If dolphins are so bloody clever how come they never invented fire?

(http://www.onpoi.net/ah/pics/users/209_1137109117_20029211530-0-swoop.gif)


Opposable thumbs?
Title: Deep thought question of the week.....2
Post by: Airscrew on January 31, 2006, 09:41:27 PM
Maybe they couldnt figure out how to keep the matches lit?  Especially if they're using those book matches, you know how soggy they get when its damp out,....

oh yeah  BUTTER!!!
Title: Deep thought question of the week.....2
Post by: type_char on February 01, 2006, 02:49:36 AM
dolphins are smart even though they didnt invent fire.
Title: Deep thought question of the week.....2
Post by: Ghosth on February 01, 2006, 06:38:28 AM
Smart, bloody genus is closer to the truth.

Ever see a dolphin work all day in a 2 x 4 cubicle for peanuts?

Nope, they'd rather laze around splashing each other, eating the passing fish.

Ever see a dolphin spend all weekend mowing, clipping, painting, weeding, spraying, or such?

Nope, man that dude is laid back in the water. Practise a few jumps, splash some water at another dolphin. Then on to a light lunch of sushi, and off to the beach to oggle some human babes. Maybe even find a sea turtle to play catch with enroute. He is seriously laid back, has his head in the right place all the time.

Meantime, us poor humans are working and slaving so once a year we can go see a dolphin jump through the air.

Who's the dummies?