Aces High Bulletin Board

General Forums => The O' Club => Topic started by: SteffK on January 31, 2006, 08:53:47 AM

Title: You will P1ss yourself
Post by: SteffK on January 31, 2006, 08:53:47 AM
Apparently completely true !

Just imagine sitting in traffic on your way to work and hearing
this.

Many Sydney folks DID hear this on the FOX FM morning show in Sydney. The DJs play a game where they award winners great prizes. The game is called "Mate Match". The DJs call someone at work and ask if they are Married or seriously involved with someone. If the contestant answers
"yes", he or she is then asked 3 random yet highly personal questions. The person is also asked to divulge the name of their partner (with phone number) for verification. If their partner answers those same three questions correctly, they both win the prize.

One particular game, however, several months ago made the
Harbour City drop to its knees with laughter and is possibly the funniest thing you've heard yet.

Anyway, here's how it all went down:

DJ: "Hey! This is Ed on FOX-FM. Have you ever heard of 'Mate
Match'?"

Contestant: (laughing) "Yes, I have."

DJ: "Great! Then you know we're giving away a trip to the Gold
Coast if
you
win.
What is your name? First only please."

Contestant: "Brian."

DJ: "Brian, are you married or what?"

Brian: (laughing nervously) "Yes, I am married."

DJ: "Thank you. Now, what is your wife's name? First only
please."

Brian: "Sara."

DJ: "Is Sara at work, Brian?"

Brian: "She is gonna kill me."

DJ: "Stay with me here, Brian! Is she at work?"

Brian: (laughing) "Yes, she's at work."

DJ: "Okay, first question - when was the last time you had sex?"

Brian: "About 8 o'clock this morning."

DJ: "Atta boy, Brian."

Brian: (laughing sheepishly) "Well..."

DJ: "Question #2 - How long did it last?"

Brian: "About 10 minutes."

DJ: "Wow! You really want that trip, huh? No one would ever have
said
that
if a trip wasn't at stake."

Brian: "Yeah, that trip sure would be nice."

DJ: "Okay. Final question. Where did you have sex at 8 o'clock
this
morning?

Brian: (laughing hard) "I, ummm, I, well..."

DJ: "This sounds good, Brian. Where was it at?"

Brian: "Not that it was all that great, but her mum is staying
with us
for
a couple of weeks..."

DJ: "Uh huh..."

Brian: "...and the Mother-In-Law was in the shower at the time."

DJ: "Atta boy, Brian."

Brian: "On the kitchen table."

DJ: "Not that great?? That is more adventure than the previous
hundred
times
I've done it. Okay folks, I will put Brian on hold, get this
wife's work
number and call her up. You listen to this."

[ 3 minutes of commercials follow. ]

DJ: "Okay audience; let's call Sarah, shall we?" (Touch
tones.....ringing....)

Clerk: "Kinkos."

DJ: "Hey, is Sarah around there somewhere?"

Clerk: "This is she."

DJ: "Sarah, this is Ed with FOX-FM. We are live on the air right
now and
I've been talking with Brian for a couple of hours now."

Sarah: (laughing) "A couple of hours?"

DJ: "Well, a while now. He is on the line with us. Brian knows
not to
give
any answers away or you'll lose. Sooooooo... do you know the
rules of
'Mate
Match'?"

Sarah: "No."

DJ: "Good!"

Brian: (laughing)

Sarah: (laughing) "Brian, what the hell are you up to?"

Brian: (laughing) "Just answer his questions honestly, okay? Be
completely
honest."

DJ: "Yeah yeah yeah. Sure. Now, I will ask you 3 questions,
Sarah. If
your
answers match Brian's answers, then the both of you will be off
to the
Gold
Coast for 5 days on us.

Sarah: (laughing) "Yes."

DJ: "Alright. When did you last have sex, Sarah?"

Sarah: "Oh God, Brian....uh, this morning before Brian went to
work."

DJ: "What time?"

Sarah: "Around 8 this morning."

DJ: "Very good. Next question. How long did it last?"

Sarah: "12, 15 minutes maybe."

DJ: "Hmmmm. That's close enough. I am sure she is trying to
protect his
manhood. We've got one last question,

Sarah. You are one question away from a trip to the Gold Coast.
Are you
ready?"

Sarah: (laughing) "Yes."

DJ: "Where did you have it?"

Sarah: "OH MY GOD, BRIAN!! You didn't tell them that did you?"

Brian: "Just tell him, honey."

DJ: "What is bothering you so much, Sarah?"

Sarah: "Well..."

DJ: Come on Sarah.....where did you have it?



Wait for it...





Sarah: "Up the arse....."

After a long pause, the DJ said, "Folks, we need to take a
station break"

And the drivers of Sydney almost crashed their cars laughing!
Title: Re: You will P1ss yourself
Post by: dedalos on January 31, 2006, 09:09:15 AM
Quote
Originally posted by SteffK
Apparently completely true !
 


:rofl  Prolly not.  Seen it 6 years ago claiming to be from a California radio station.

But funny anyway :lol
Title: You will P1ss yourself
Post by: USHilDvl on January 31, 2006, 09:16:20 AM
New or old doesn't matter...

That's just plain funny...

:rofl

Title: You will P1ss yourself
Post by: Sandman on January 31, 2006, 11:13:26 AM
Snopes (http://www.snopes.com/radiotv/tv/newlywed.htm) is your friend.
Title: You will P1ss yourself
Post by: Airscrew on January 31, 2006, 11:14:24 AM
:rofl :rofl

its funny, but very similar to a clip thats run from time to time on those TV Bloopers shows, from The Newlywed Game, probably about mid 70's.  
Question is were did you have sex last?  Husband says something like "in the kitchen or the car"  wife comes on answers the same question "in the arse"  :rofl
Title: You will P1ss yourself
Post by: Airscrew on January 31, 2006, 11:18:54 AM
Sandman, I was close, probably not remembering all the details.
Title: You will P1ss yourself
Post by: Sandman on January 31, 2006, 12:42:19 PM
Yes, thought the same thing you did, but went searching for the Newlywed story. Was surprised to find the radio show story there as well.
Title: You will P1ss yourself
Post by: Nilsen on January 31, 2006, 01:54:15 PM
i dont need to check snoops.. thats just funny  :rofl
Title: You will P1ss yourself
Post by: Mustaine on January 31, 2006, 02:11:14 PM
Quote
Originally posted by Sandman
Snopes (http://www.snopes.com/radiotv/tv/newlywed.htm) is your friend.
i heard what may be a staged clip of this on a morning radio show... replayed for the laughs.

i think it was from those guys that did the "nascar" call posted here the other day.

anyway, it was probably staged.
Title: You will P1ss yourself
Post by: DREDIOCK on January 31, 2006, 03:56:47 PM
The Newlywed version I know to be true.
Caught it on an outtakes show about a year ago
Title: You will P1ss yourself
Post by: lasersailor184 on January 31, 2006, 04:46:06 PM
SNOPES IS NOT MY FRIEND.
Title: You will P1ss yourself
Post by: Sandman on January 31, 2006, 05:50:20 PM
Quote
Originally posted by Nilsen
i dont need to check snoops.. thats just funny  :rofl


The truth is funnier. ;)
Title: You will P1ss yourself
Post by: Sandman on January 31, 2006, 05:52:07 PM
Quote
Originally posted by lasersailor184
SNOPES IS NOT MY FRIEND.


Whatever you say. (http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Pollyanna) ;)
Title: You will P1ss yourself
Post by: Red Tail 444 on January 31, 2006, 05:54:59 PM
Damn


I never even felt the hook on that one!~

I was hooked, gaffed, in the boat, gutted and mounted before I knew WTF hapened

:rofl