Aces High Bulletin Board

General Forums => The O' Club => Topic started by: beet1e on January 31, 2006, 07:03:23 PM

Title: Oh no, my Airbus won’t go!
Post by: beet1e on January 31, 2006, 07:03:23 PM: Well, how embarrassing! Now that the US/Europe pissing contest material has shifted away from guns and onto Boeing/Airbus, I have my own anecdotal tale of woe to tell about Airbus.

…so there I was, all strapped into my seat on a Monarch Airlines A320 about to depart LGW bound for TFS. I felt the nudge as pushback commenced, and assumed that the next sounds would be the first engine starting and the ”Borrrfff…” sound as it lights up, but… nothing. Indeed, the next sound was the Captain’s voice, announcing a “minor technical difficulty”! The engine won’t start. The engineers are going to have to come out and do engine runs – not permitted with passengers on, so would we kindly disembark back to the gate lounge. Shortly after stepping into the gate lounge came the news that the aircraft had been declared unserviceable. My heart sank. In over 40 years of commercial flying as a passenger, this was only the second time this had happened, and on the only other occasion we had to make an unscheduled stopover in Lisbon. (That time, it was a B727 on the second leg of a journey to Funchal back in the old 2-hop days because of the short runway at FNC.) Still, I don’t think it’s fair to blame Airbus for an engine fault when the engine was made by Phut and Whine.

However, very much to the credit of Monarch Airlines, a replacement aircraft was found, and we were all delighted to hear that it was already on the ground at LGW. We had been instructed to remain at the gate and when the replacement aircraft was ready, we embarked down the steps and onto the apron to be bussed out to the plane, which was in a remote corner of the airfield about a mile from the original gate area.

This next aircraft looked like a much better proposition – an A321 - newer, 40 seats bigger, and best of all it had Rolls Royce engines, the silver RR decals on the side of the engines gleaming reassuringly in the early afternoon sun as we pulled up alongside.

We took off only about 2 hours later than originally planned. I was surprised how quiet this A321 was, even on takeoff. It soon got to ~35,000ft – on account of the cold crisp air over Britain, the 40 empty seats, and the relatively light payload of fuel which, I am reliably informed, would have been about 20 tons. Another possible factor in this fast climb was the average passenger weight, which… no, I’d better not go there. :lol;)

It was also the smoothest flight I can ever remember, so smooth that I was able to balance a 20p coin on its edge on my open tray-table – a great tribute to Airbus engineering, and to the Rolls Royce engines of course. The computers doing the flying did a great job. The tail stayed on throughout the entire flight.

The return journey was an A320 again – it was fine, with much more legroom than the A321 or the original A320, but I think it had Phut & Whine engines – cod the drone was deafening on takeoff – and I was in row 4. But cruise was OK. I assume the tail stayed on – it was too dark for me to see upon arrival back at LGW. :p
Title: Oh no, my Airbus won’t go!
Post by: Ripsnort on January 31, 2006, 07:41:55 PM: (http://pic4.picturetrail.com/VOL767/2726312/8668097/126466126.jpg)
(http://pic4.picturetrail.com/VOL767/2726312/8668097/127890190.jpg)
(http://pic4.picturetrail.com/VOL767/2726312/8668097/127890183.jpg)
Title: Oh no, my Airbus won’t go!
Post by: SFRT - Frenchy on January 31, 2006, 09:56:16 PM: I was surprised how quiet this A321 was, even on takeoff

Because a Boeing towed it to FL350.
Title: Oh no, my Airbus won’t go!
Post by: Sandman on January 31, 2006, 10:22:21 PM: Rip, spit out the hook.
Title: Oh no, my Airbus won’t go!
Post by: Yeager on January 31, 2006, 11:15:38 PM: pooor beatle, thought he was on a airbus :aok
Title: Oh no, my Airbus won’t go!
Post by: beet1e on February 01, 2006, 02:54:54 AM: Muhahahahaha! Sandman has it! Got the prize catch on the first hook! :rofl

OK, the part about the engines was BS - I've no idea who made the engines on any of the three aircraft! (http://www.zen33071.zen.co.uk/jester.gif) But there's a good chance that RR did - their engines are used in the BA and Virgin fleet.

Everything else was as I said - A320, we did have to disembark and got an A321, it was smooth and I really did do that thing with the 20p coin.
Title: Oh no, my Airbus won’t go!
Post by: Hangtime on February 01, 2006, 03:30:40 AM: I believe the engines on airbuses were first tested in other applications.

.

(http://www.first-to-fly.com/Adventure%20Images/Models/RBP%20Flyer%20motor%20detail.jpg)
Title: Oh no, my Airbus won’t go!
Post by: B@tfinkV on February 01, 2006, 04:42:57 AM: sup beat, if you come my way ill buy you a pint of ale.

we can discuss the finer points of online fishing :p

nice catch, btw
Title: Oh no, my Airbus won’t go!
Post by: Ripsnort on February 01, 2006, 08:18:34 AM: No catch, just saying...his posts are predictable as the troll that crosses the bridge...please make it stop. Its not even disguised anymore.
Title: Oh no, my Airbus won’t go!
Post by: beet1e on February 01, 2006, 09:13:46 AM: Quote
Originally posted by Ripsnort
No catch, just saying...his posts are predictable as the troll that crosses the bridge...please make it stop. Its not even disguised anymore.
ROFL! Coming from the greatest troll merchant this board has ever known, I claim victory in the online angling contest!
Title: Oh no, my Airbus won’t go!
Post by: USHilDvl on February 01, 2006, 09:32:17 AM: *yawn*
Title: Oh no, my Airbus won’t go!
Post by: Hangtime on February 01, 2006, 09:40:48 AM: Quote
Originally posted by beet1e
ROFL! Coming from the greatest troll merchant this board has ever known, I claim victory in the online angling contest!

Obviously, moving to the upstairs apartment in an outhouse does give you bragging rights on the folks still living downstairs. However, I feel it's important to point out that your address is still the same.
Title: Oh no, my Airbus won’t go!
Post by: Ripsnort on February 01, 2006, 09:44:51 AM: Quote
Originally posted by USHilDvl
*yawn*
Exactly.

And calling a thread useless and boring is not exactly getting caught. :rolleyes:

(http://pic4.picturetrail.com/VOL767/2726312/8668097/127933602.jpg)
Title: Oh no, my Airbus won’t go!
Post by: Saintaw on February 01, 2006, 09:52:18 AM: This is a punt if favour of beet.
Title: Oh no, my Airbus won’t go!
Post by: Ripsnort on February 01, 2006, 09:58:23 AM: This is a punt to show what an idiot you are, Beet....oh wait, its already at the top, and everyone knows your an idiot. :rofl
Title: Oh no, my Airbus won’t go!
Post by: beet1e on February 01, 2006, 09:59:38 AM: Thanks, SAW! :aok:cool:

And Rip, no-one forces you to read my threads. You made that choice yourself.
Title: Oh no, my Airbus won’t go!
Post by: Ripsnort on February 01, 2006, 10:04:02 AM: Quote
Originally posted by beet1e
Thanks, SAW! :aok:cool:

And Rip, no-one forces you to read my threads. You made that choice yourself.
I understand that beet. I can't help but make fun of you and your posts though, you're such a big target. :rofl
Title: Oh no, my Airbus won’t go!
Post by: beet1e on February 01, 2006, 10:09:46 AM: Quote
Originally posted by Ripsnort
you're such a big target. :rofl
...as I would have to be to give you any chance of a hit.
(http://www.zen33071.zen.co.uk/lmao.gif)
Title: Oh no, my Airbus won’t go!
Post by: Hangtime on February 01, 2006, 10:10:26 AM: ..and getting you both in the same thread saves ammo.
Title: Oh no, my Airbus won’t go!
Post by: Saintaw on February 01, 2006, 10:13:55 AM: Quote
Originally posted by Ripsnort
:cry Beetle gets more attention than me :cry
Title: Oh no, my Airbus won’t go!
Post by: Ripsnort on February 01, 2006, 10:19:58 AM: I'm not crying over THAT kind of attention, Saw. ;)
Title: Oh no, my Airbus won’t go!
Post by: StSanta on February 01, 2006, 11:11:43 AM: Airbus, FEH. Boeing PUHLEEEZE.

Everyone knows what to go for:

(http://avia.m74.ru/pict/an28.jpg)

Or:

(http://www.airventure.de/gatowpics/Mi-8-01-93+14.jpg)

The rest is just for sheeple
Title: Oh no, my Airbus won’t go!
Post by: beet1e on February 01, 2006, 12:04:13 PM: Quote
Originally posted by Ripsnort
his posts are predictable as the troll that crosses the bridge...please make it stop. Its not even disguised anymore.
LOL - Rip's just pissed that the tail didn't fall off my Airbus, and that I'm still here to post. :rofl
Title: Oh no, my Airbus won’t go!
Post by: aztec on February 04, 2006, 04:34:12 PM: I've often wondered if you locked Beetle and Ripsnort in a room together if they would simply cancel each other out and disappear into a thin wisp of smoke. Guess not:(