Aces High Bulletin Board
General Forums => The O' Club => Topic started by: DREDIOCK on February 03, 2006, 07:51:36 AM
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Ok I'll admit it Im a bit of a sadist.
Im also the one that gets my kids up and off to school in the morning(well just my daughter now)
Neither of them particularly have liked getting up in the morning so
Over the years I've had some fun in the methods I've used and still occasionally use to get them up in the morning.
Some examples are,
Dripping drops of water on exposed parts of the head and body
Tipping the mattress up and dumping them on the floor
lighting and dropping a pack of firecrackers into the large metal wastepaper basket in my sons room.
One day I ran a pair of original Bose 901 series speakers into my sons room and played the climax of 1812 overture (the only part of it most people know) full blast
And it is amazing how well the bugle call "Reveille" works. No wonder why the armed forces use it.
One of my favorites is a song. Both kids have learned to hate over the years.
Growing up my mother used to sing it to me in the morning which caused me to hate it then. but not because of the song but because she sings terribly.
Anyway. Just found a recording of it and thought I'd share it as well as this story with you.
Funny. my daughter is sitting in the next room and upon playing it she started screaming "Im up Im up!" LMAO
OH HOW I HATE TO GET UP IN THE MORNING (http://www.firstworldwar.com/audio/Arthur%20Fields%20-%20Oh!%20How%20I%20Hate%20to%20Get%20Up%20in%20the%20Morning.mp3)
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Right there with ya', Dred...
Here's my routine favorite...
First, roust the dogs. Between 'em, they amass about 200+ pounds. Jazz 'em up good with play noises and toys.
Then, quietly open the bedroom door...
Now, gently toss the favorite toy onto said sleeping kid-lumps...
...and watch the fireworks!! :rofl
Works each and every time :aok
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Try this one too:
(sung to the tune of "John Brown's Body")
I know a song that gets on everybody's nerves
I know a song that gets on everybody's nerves
I know a song that gets on everybody's nerves
...and the song goes just like this:
I know a song that gets on everybody's nerves
I know a song that gets on everybody's nerves
I know a song that gets on everybody's nerves
...and the song goes just like this:
I know a song that gets on everybody's nerves
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If that link doesnt work just go here
FIRST WORLD WAR.COM (http://www.firstworldwar.com/audio/ohhowihatetogetupinthemorning.htm)
And pick the Arthur Feilds version (better sounding recording)
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My kids have always been early risers, probably because I get up at 3:45am and the wife at 4:30am. Weekends we "sleep in" until 5:30am. The latest the kids have ever slept in is 7:30am...they're usually both up no later than 6:30am. They're not teenagers yet, so no doubt their sleeping habits will change.
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Originally posted by Ripsnort
My kids have always been early risers, probably because I get up at 3:45am and the wife at 4:30am. Weekends we "sleep in" until 5:30am. The latest the kids have ever slept in is 7:30am...they're usually both up no later than 6:30am. They're not teenagers yet, so no doubt their sleeping habits will change.
Wow... what time do you go to bed?
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a sack of marbles kept over night in the freezer does the trick when you toss the marbles under the covers
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OOOohh, man Eagler...just plain harsh, that is. Frozen marbles...how did you think of that one!?
Too funny...:rofl
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Originally posted by slimey_J
Wow... what time do you go to bed?
Me or the kids? I only require 5-6 hours of sleep a night, the kids need 8-10. I'm usually in bed by 8:30pm and asleep by 9:30.
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Just as long as you don't flip the light switch on and off. I believe that's why I now get extremely pissed off at flashing lights.
I made an oath to god that if my Mother had ever done that to me again, I would have jumped over the banister to the stairs in my room and strangled her.
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Originally posted by Eagler
a sack of marbles kept over night in the freezer does the trick when you toss the marbles under the covers
Alll the wickedness of ice water without the mess.
Brilliant!
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The marbles trick is awsome.. thanks eagler, 15 years too late for me to employ and write a field use report on. Bummer.
I used with great effect the entire contents of the brita water pitcher I keep in the fridge. The fridge is very cold (for the beer).
Only had to use it once. After that, on second warning I'd just have to open and slam close the refrigerator to hear "DAD.. NO!! I'm UP already..."
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I see cut-rate nursing homes with abusive orderlies in all of your futures.
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Originally posted by Heretik
I see cut-rate nursing homes with abusive orderlies in all of your futures.
(http://www.destinationhollywood.com/celebrities/benstiller/images/benstiller_happygilmore_02.jpg)
Check the name tag.... you're in my world now, grandma.
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I had the alarm clock rigged in the kids rooms. If they hit the 'snooze' button (only took one time) it would trigger a rather loud playing of a tape loop of "Best of John Phillip Sousa (sp?)".
If the alarm went off and they were still in bed 5 minutes later, the same loop would start automatically, and progressivley get louder until they got to the kitchen, where the off button resided.
It's cool being a geeky engineer. :D
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unfortunately for my parents, nothing could get me out of bed in the morning unless i wanted too. they tried everything: pouring an entire pitcher of water, loud alarm clocks, pulling me out of bed and even blairing bagpipe music. but nothing works on me.
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Originally posted by SMIDSY
unfortunately for my parents, nothing could get me out of bed in the morning unless i wanted too. they tried everything: pouring an entire pitcher of water, loud alarm clocks, pulling me out of bed and even blairing bagpipe music. but nothing works on me.
Come over to my house. I guarantee inside a week you WILL be getting up.
Course it may be in a futile attempt to try and kill me. but you WILL be getting up.:D
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sounds like a wager to me.:aok
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Originally posted by SMIDSY
sounds like a wager to me.:aok
Go for it, just keep in mind I did admit to being a sadist
Mwwahahahaha
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Originally posted by SMIDSY
sounds like a wager to me.:aok
Until DRED collects his money by teabagging you.
Karaya
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dental floss in the nostrils and ears
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Originally posted by DREDIOCK
Go for it, just keep in mind I did admit to being a sadist
Mwwahahahaha
well so am I. prepare to die in your sleep from pointy object related injuries.
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Originally posted by SMIDSY
well so am I. prepare to die in your sleep from pointy object related injuries.
If I had a nickle for every time I heard that threat lmao
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How about getting one of them plug into the wall timers and then plugging a school-grade fire alarm buzzer (the ones that are loud and annoying as hell)
Set it up in their room under their bed, guarantee to get results (That was done to me before, it isnt fun unless you do it to someone else)
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Originally posted by SMIDSY
well so am I. prepare to die in your sleep from pointy object related injuries.
There's always a time when kids think they can exert their will via violence, or the threat of it; either in packs or one to one. There's only one way to deal with an insolent youngster that makes a threat.. and thats to stomp the living **** out of 'em. Instantly, with extreme malice and without remorse afterwards.
It's been my personal policy.. and it's served me quite well.
A quiet piece of advice SMIDSY.. don't make that bet with me; and I suspect you've made a very poor choice in placing it with Dred.
Have a nice day. :)
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Originally posted by Hangtime
There's always a time when kids think they can exert their will via violence, or the threat of it; either in packs or one to one. There's only one way to deal with an insolent youngster that makes a threat.. and thats to stomp the living **** out of 'em. Instantly, with extreme malice and without remorse afterwards....
and thus the error with today’s parents, they are afraid of their own children
just isn’t enough arse whooping going on these days.. image how those kids will raise their kids?
when did getting a well deserved belt/spanking become some sort of medieval torture?
kids are likes puppies .. except puppies have puppy breath while kids grow up to be teenagers .....
if more ppl figured that out ahead of time, abortion and the extermination of unwanted pets at the animal shelters would not be an issue anymore...
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I know I could get Smidsy out of bed, but he would need a show when I was done.
I hear the germans even like it. Or was it being **** on they like?
:D
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LOL My mom used to do some of those to me too. Untill I decided to grow up :)
Last time she poured water on me all hell broke loose and fire literally came out of my eyes.