Aces High Bulletin Board
General Forums => The O' Club => Topic started by: FUNKED1 on February 08, 2006, 11:35:51 PM
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Skuzzy can you make a museum area for them?
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I nominate Classy Man, because he is the Classiest Class Man Around!
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Maybe a "Mr.Black etal. kiosk" It could be like a wall with all the Mr. Black personalities listed.
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"Come one, come all and see the greatest trolls ever seen on the Internet! Watch as they bicker incesently about random topics! See the amazing Nationalism Troll, who does nothing but brag about his country's accomplishments over the others! Come witness the amazing Flame Troll, whose space-age flame suit makes him impervious to the hottest of flames! Watch as the infamous Spam Troll smashes a keyboard with his fists and posts once every six seconds! Tremble in fear as the Tantrum Troll spews forth a torrent of explatives over senseless things, then whines when others make fun of him for it! Then, you'll be on the edge of your seats for the Main Attraction, the Mr. Black Troll, who spins wild tales of fantasy and woe just because he can!
"Don't miss out on this once in a lifetime event as Skuzzy, the Ringmaster, cuts the ribbon to open the BBS Troll Show for the general public, this Sunday at five o'clock!
"Sunday, Sunday, SUNDAY!!!"
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I'd like to nominate Denmark.
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Texace,
OUTSTANDING!!!! :rofl :rofl :rofl :aok
You left out the tantrum troll starring Urchin the juvinile from pampered hell!!!:confused:
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:rofl
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Fixed...it's in there now. :D:D:D :rofl
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:rofl :rofl :D
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LOL
There's a one-liner English joke, whose punchline is "a police horse". I always think of Mav when I hear that joke. I bet Furball knows it too.
:rofl
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In his best PT Barnum voice:
"Quickly, folks, this way! This way to the trolls!"
*points*
"There he is, ladies and jellyspoons! The Nationalism Troll! Watch as he carefully manipulates discussions and quotes to ensure that his country always comes out as the victor in any argument! You'll be dumbfounded at the sheer tenacity of this beast as he weaves a tale of nationalistic pride and grandour! Watch out, ladies! He can be dangerous if provoked!"
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:rofl
We could have Troll Bowl and an Annual Troll Convention
I never met a troll i didnt like - Will Rodgers
We have nothing troll for except the troll its self - FDR
Ask not what your Troll can do for you but what you can do for your Troll - JFK
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Originally posted by VOR
I'd like to nominate Denmark.
For the NOBEL PEACE PRIZE of course!! I second that nomination!
:rofl :rofl :rofl :rofl
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Originally posted by WindX
For the NOBEL PEACE PRIZE of course!! I second that nomination!
:rofl :rofl :rofl :rofl
The "Voss Conspiracy" and "The Lowest form of Game" need no less than honorable mention
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Mr. Blacks "MONKEY LOVE!!!!!"
:rofl
Mac
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Voss Conspiracy should be at the top of the list.
Karaya
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Originally posted by AWMac
Mr. Blacks "MONKEY LOVE!!!!!"
:rofl
Mac
Aces High BB > General Forums > The O' Club > Mr. Black Really is a Sniper...I Can Prove It
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01-23-2004 03:18 AM
Drunky
Persona Non Grata
Registered: Oct 2001
Location: Drinking to Dime
Posts: 2038
Mr. Black Really is a Sniper...I Can Prove It
I'm here to defend Mr. Black. I ALONE am in the position to do this since I was his closest confidant and spotter from sniper school until his time as a sniper in South America. Here's a picture to prove it. Look at the circled area.
Yeah, if you look real, real hard you still won't see us. That's how good we were. Completely one with the land. Scary stuff...BOOOO Scared you didn't I? In fact, this picture was taken by whom we were sent to . Turns out he didn't see us either. We took the camera and film from him when we finally found his dead .
We blended so well that even the animals accepted us. In particular, a young monkey with large pleading eyes began to follow us. Probably thought we were his parents. Well, Mr. Black took to the little critter like a duck to water. Mr. Black would pet the young mokey, gently running his hand through his fur over and over. More times than not Mr. Black let him ride around on his head and would pick and eat the fleas from the furry little bugger during our rest stops. Hell, he even let the monkey sleep with him.
Eventually, he became a bit possessive of the little monkey. It seemed everytime I even looked at the little furball Mr. Black would narrow his eyes into barely perceptable slits and whisper in a barely audible tone, "Don't touch my monkey." Late at night I often heard him whispering to the little monkey in his bedroll, "Monkey love, that's the best love." in a panted voice over and over. Finally, it seemed that Mr. Black would inhale real deep and shudder. Followed by a long exhale, then fall asleep. Man, he must have really loved for that monkey. I just didn't realize how much at the time.
As we approached our target at , things quickly went south. In fact, things happend so fast that it's still blurred even now when I think of it. It seemed the first thing I heard was an explosion followed by Mr. Black's roaring voice rending the stunned silence, "Monkey killers, monkey killers...YOU KILLED MY MONKEY....MY MONKEY."
That's when all hell broke loose. Mr. Black started firing. I've never seen someone shoot the M82A1A so fast with such precision. It seemd that a ruthless, unswerving killer instict that had been boiling just under the surface finally erupted. As I watched from further up the hill though my spotter binoculars, Mr. Black single handedly shot and an entire platoon of . The last guy he was running down a mountain path. I thought that Mr. Black didn't have a chance of hitting him since I ranged the guy over 2,000 yards, but I was wrong. I guess monkey love was stronger. All said and done I counted twelve dead , the last one at 2,210.2135987302+1 yards. Damn he must have really loved that monkey.
I have to admit that even I, his trusted spotter, was a bit unnerved as I saw him seemingly appear though the smoke toward me walking back up the mountain with the poor little dead monkey in his arms. He seemed in a daze, not even realizing as he bumped into me. As we exfiled, him carressing what was left of the monkey's head, I began to worry about his sanity. After 2 days and over 600 miles, him still carrying the mokey's corpse with flies buzzing around it and maggets begining to appear from eruptions in his furry hide, I knew that Mr. Black was a damaged man. It wasn't until later that I feared for my safety.
That night I awoke from a fitfull sleep to find Mr. Black's combat knife under my neck. In one hand he held the knife with its edge pressed firmly just below my adam's apple, in the other he carried his dead monkey. I can admit now, only after much therapy, that I was indeed afraid. The dazed look had finally left Mr. Black's eyes leaving a diamond sharp focus that seemed to bury into my soul. I dared not even breathe...
He held the knife there for what seemed several minutes but were probably only seconds. Sweat began to form not only under my neck but also around my genitals. Finally he gentlly began to whispered to me in the dead of night but his voice began to rise until he was shouting at the top of his lungs, "potpie... Potpie...POTPIE...POTPIE, POTPIE, POTPIE." The vein in his forhead was throbbing madly before he collapsed. Losing his monkey was too much for him apparently. I contructed a litter and carried him to the extraction point.
Sadly it all proved too much for Mr. Black. He began to slip in and out of our reality. He claimed to be other people, notable someone called RC51 among others, and even stated things that never happened. It was a sad day to see a once great man, sitting behind a computer a slave to his mad delusions, claiming at times to be performing experiments on people and other times claiming to be funny and playing jokes on people. Sadly enough, he even resorts to claiming to have stated nothing concrete, despite everything to the contrary, in order to deflect any scrutiny of him.
Bowed by time and circumstance, this poor pathetic soul is now know P3WN3D How sad.
The King is dead...Long live Airhead.
__________________
Fat Drunk Bastards
I'm the black sheep of the FDB family
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The Airhead/transgender/stripper show was pretty stinking good
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Originally posted by Maverick
Texace,
OUTSTANDING!!!! :rofl :rofl :rofl :aok
You left out the tantrum troll starring Urchin the juvinile from pampered hell!!!:confused:
:aok
Hope you choke to death on a dick, big man.
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I dunno...the vos one was good.The Stripper one was outstanding but the PETA troll with whats his name actually SLEEPING with the dieing deer and the PETA tard sucking it all up was priceless:rofl :rofl
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I nominate Beetle/Lazs for the Best Duet
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Originally posted by Urchin
:aok
Hope you choke to death on a , big man.
"Step right up, folks, and see the foul-mouthed, terrifying Tantrum Troll! Bear in mind, ladies and jellyspoons, that the Tantrum Troll can be rather unpredicatble. Please do not tap on the glass and keep your handbags close to you. The Tantrum Troll has a penchant for being loud and obnoxious, and can has an extraordinarily large vocabulary filled with the most pungent words ever heard in the Big Top! The Ringmaster had one hell of a time wrangling him in, folks!"
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Originally posted by Texace
Blah blah...
Goes double for you squirt.
Be the most deadly 69 in history, I suppose.
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"As you can see, ladies and otherwise, the Tantrum Troll can be extraordinarily crass and outspoken. You'd be wise to cover the ears of the youngsters among you. You are witness to one of his calculated and energetic outbursts. Look closely at his angry snarl and balled fists useful for bashing the keyboard and milking the giant cow. Take note of his large feet, good for stomping untl his way is granted. Careful, folks, he bites!
This way! This way to the egress! See the greatest egress in the world!"
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Blah blah...
You are one to talk about class now rofl.
If I was your grandfather, I'd have killed myself out of regret a long time ago.
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Originally posted by DrDea
I dunno...the vos one was good.The Stripper one was outstanding but the PETA troll with whats his name actually SLEEPING with the dieing deer and the PETA tard sucking it all up was priceless:rofl :rofl
Estes/ Shivermetimbers posted that one and I was in tears for a few minutes.
1. Voss Conspiracy
2. PETA Troll
everything else, well....that's it.
Karaya
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Originally posted by LePaul
The Airhead/transgender/stripper show was pretty stinking good
That was me actually. *bows*
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ummm pot? meet kettle...
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I got someone's panties twisted in a knot...
...and that makes me happy. :)
The PETA thread was downright hilarious. That one had me rolling.
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You forgot Elfenwolf's bungee accident.
Or the defense of the poor lady with the bum stuck in her window.
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Originally posted by Urchin
Blah blah...
You are one to talk about class now rofl.
If I was your grandfather, I'd have killed myself out of regret a long time ago.
Good lord, what is the matter with you?
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AHAHHAHHAHAH I remember the PETA thread, that was about as much fun as screaming "Its coming right at us!" or "Thin out the herd" while shooting varmints and other dumb animals
Can you believe that was just barely over a year ago? Man time sure flies.
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These I just had to cut and paste, their just too funny :D
Smegonem = meatwad
i really dont care for them...even tho they are animal free...i just enver liked marshmellow/marshmallows anyways
smegonem 12/27/04 10:21 AM
Just go into a store and buy them. They are maybe 75 cents a bag. You arent some kind of sissy, are you?
[tWitch] 12/23/04 2:37 PM
That is SO great! Too bad cows can't actually break out their uzi's and shoot the crap outta the majority of the human population, eh?
smegonem 12/23/04 5:25 PM
Too bad the majority of the humam population dont break out uzi's and shoot the crap outta cows.
and this one really upset them
Fish are dumb. I set my fish on the floor across the room from the aquarium, and it couldn’t even find its way home. So it died.
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:rofl :rofl Good stuff.
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Man, Urchin is proving to be a remarkable tard.
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Holy crap... how long can the daisy chain get?
Are we going for a AH BBS record?
Get your lube and your cameras! Call the Guiness people!
Go back to wanking with your R2D2, reject.
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"He just doesn't stop, folks! You'll be getting your monies worth today! Don't bunch up, now, for there's plenty of room for everyone! You may even see the legendary Ringmaster Skuzzy in person!"
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it's truly amazing. you can actually put the word "Troll" in the name of the thread and you will still find someone young/dumb enough to bite at ever single mention of his name.
who's picture do you see when you look up "gullible" in the dictionary?
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Originally posted by Urchin
Holy crap... how long can the daisy chain get?
Go back to working on your R2D2, you glorious piece of masculinity. You continue to amaze us all with your ingenious engineering!
Why thanks!
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Originally posted by texace
"He just doesn't stop, folks! You'll be getting your monies worth today! Don't bunch up, now, for there's plenty of room for everyone! You may even see the legendary Ringmaster Skuzzy in person!"
So Texass... when you and the other piglets get together... who pitches and who catches?
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What about "I'm secretly in love with my flight instructor".
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Originally posted by LePaul
Why thanks!
Lol.... you built a model. WTG.
Didn't your boyfriend break up with you over that? To much time spent polishing the knob while staring at dreamy Luke skywalker? Lol...
Pathetic..
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Keep swinging...let's make sure you've come up with some wittier insults before Skuzzy boots ya