Aces High Bulletin Board
General Forums => The O' Club => Topic started by: Silat on February 13, 2006, 06:04:18 PM
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Top 10 Cheney Excuses for Shooting that Guy
From the home office, Dick Cheney's Top 10 Excuses for Shooting That Guy:
10 Sure, like you've never seen seen giant game birds wearing day glo orange vests
9 Warrantless domestic spying revealed he was getting phone calls from al Queda
8 If the Vice President does it, its not against the law
7 Hoping to put him in a persistent vegetative state so the GOP could pass a law to keep him alive
6 Thought he was hunting Dan Quayle
5 The love between them could not survive back in Washington
4 Birds, Cows, People-- with my eyesight I'm lucky I hit anything
3 Positive the guy's family will welcome him as a liberator
2 Pheasants? I thought we were hunting peasants
and the number one Cheney excuse for shooting that guy:
1 Open season on liberals started early this year
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Dick Cheney Invites Jack Abramoff Bird Hunting
In a stunning reversal of policy, Vice-President Dick Cheney has invited the openly shunned Jack Abramoff bird hunting. The Vice-President said he doesn't mind that Mr. Abramoff is currently embroiled in scandal; Cheney just wants to "help him get away from things." Cheney noted an attribute the pair shared. "I've heard that he has a talent for wandering off. That would make him an ideal hunting buddy. I've also insisted he forgo the neon orange vest for his traditional black trench coat and fedora. I just want him to feel at ease."
When Cheney was asked why he thought this trip would help heal the nation being torn by scandal he said, "I thought Jack and I would toast the future by looking through his photographs of the President, him and I. I've insisted he bring the negatives too, so that I could blow up some of those pictures for the hunt club's wall."
Cheney commented that he thought the two might one day become family. "There's no denying Jack's spy-wannabe good looks," Cheney said through a smirk. "I've been looking for a good man for my daughter… any man to be quite honest."
The two will enjoy a fun-filled and constitutionally blessed weekend together. "Too bad," Cheney admitted, "you can only die once for your Country."
Others in Washington want Cheney to extend an olive branch to the other side of the aisle and take some Democrats with him. Dick "Trigger Finger" Cheney says he's leaving that invitation open.
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:D
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They have 10 chances and they don't even once touch on the Lawyer issue? My faith in them is gone.
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Wrong.... he shot him because he was moving to the left.
Before he shot someone heard him yell..PULL....BAM.....then they heard Chit, that's the last lawyer.
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No, it was the new pilot program to save Social Security from being overdrawn...its called the take a senior citizen hunting program.
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Most original one yet.
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Might wanna update your signature there Stang. :cry
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Originally posted by Silat
8 If the Vice President does it, its not against the law
Perfect. :D
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HOMELAND SECURITY DEPARTMENT UNVEILS CHENEY ALERT SYSTEM Color-coded System Would Warn Nation of Future Attacks by Veep Homeland Security Secretary Michael Chertoff announced today that his department would immediately implement a “Cheney Alert” system to warn Americans if an attack by Vice President Dick Cheney is imminent.
The Department of Homeland Security has been under pressure to respond to the widespread panic and anxiety that have gripped the nation since Mr. Cheney shot and wounded a fellow quail hunter while on a hunting trip in Texas over the weekend.
Across the country, people have holed up in their homes and hoarded food and water, fearing another senseless attack by the gun-toting vice president.
“What we have learned, the hard way, is that Dick Cheney can attack without warning,” Mr. Chertoff said. “It is our hope that with this Cheney Alert system we will be able to give the American people some warning before he strikes again.”
The alert system, with five color-coded levels indicating the likelihood of another brutal pellet attack by the Vice President, was derided by some in Congress such as Sen. Joseph Biden (D-Del), who likened it to “closing the barn door after the horses have escaped.”
“The fact is, the White House already had ample warning that Dick Cheney was going to strike, and they sat on their hands and did nothing,” Mr. Biden said, referring to a Presidential Daily Brief dated February 4 with the title, “Dick Cheney Determined to Strike in US.”
Elsewhere, former Education Secretary William Bennett said that he was “outraged” that an NHL gambling ring has been in operation for five years and he was never invited to participate in it.
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Quotation from Cheney explanation:
"The intelligence said that there were quail in those bushes.
Everybody thought that there were quail in those bushes.
Sadly, the intelligence was wrong.
Given what we know now, I would have shot the bastard in the face anyway.
Now we must stay the course."
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Shaddup traitor.
The quail are in their last throes.
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laser... liberals don't make fun of lawyers. If silat found it then it came from some far left corner of cyberspace.
lazs
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See Dick. RUN!!!!!
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“The Vice President Is Standing By His Decision To Shoot Harry Whittington”
:lol
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"Cheney's Got a Gun"
(To the tune of "Janie's Got a Gun" by Aerosmith)
(Dumb, dumb, dumb) Cheney what have you done
(Dumb, dumb, dumb) it's the sound of his gun
(Dumb, dumb, dumb) Cheney what have you done
(Dumb, dumb, dumb) it's the sound, it's the sound...
Hah, hah, hah, hah, hah, hah
Cheney's got a gun
Cheney's got a gun
His whole world's come undone
Was looking straight at the bum
What did ole Cheney do?
What did his friend go through
They say the EMT's attested
They found the buckshot in his face
But man, he had it comin'
Now that Cheney's got a gun
Things ain't never gonna be the same
Cheney's got a gun
Cheney's got a gun
His long week's just begun
Comedians havin' fun
Tell us it's untrue
What did the VP do
He shot his shotgun without caution
The man has got to be insane
They say the stress that he was under
Was just a little blunder
And that buckshot doesn't cause much pain
Run away, run away from blame
Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah
Run away, run away from the blame
Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah
Run away, run away, run, run away
Cheney's got a gun
Cheney's got a gun
His long week's just begun
Comedians havin' fun
What did the V.P. do
The NRA's IOU
He had to make it look easy
And put some buckshot in his brain
He said cause everyone believes me
That aimin' ain't that easy
And FOX news won't make me take the blame
Run away, run away from blame
Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah
Run away, run away from the blame
Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah
Run away, run away, run, run away
Cheney's got a gun
Cheney's got a gun
Cheney's got a gun
Everybody's on the run
Cheney's got a gun
His long week has just begun
Now everybody is on the run (Cheney, Cheney what's your problem)
Cause Cheney's got a gun (Tell me it ain't right)
Cheney's got a gun (Was it Cheney's way of talkin')
His long week has just begun (That made you scream at night)
Cheney's got a gun
His long week has just begun
Now everybody's on the run
Cheney's got a gun
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"Duck -- It's Dick"
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rofl!
Jon Stewart: "I'm joined now by our own vice-presidential firearms mishap analyst, Rob Corddry. Rob, obviously a very unfortunate situation. How is the vice president handling it?
Rob Corddry: "Jon, tonight the vice president is standing by his decision to shoot Harry Wittington. According to the best intelligence available, there were quail hidden in the brush. Everyone believed at the time there were quail in the brush.
"And while the quail turned out to be a 78-year-old man, even knowing that today, Mr. Cheney insists he still would have shot Mr. Whittington in the face. He believes the world is a better place for his spreading buckshot throughout the entire region of Mr. Whittington's face."
Jon Stewart: "But why, Rob? If he had known Mr. Whittington was not a bird, why would he still have shot him?"
Rob Corddry: "Jon, in a post-9-11 world, the American people expect their leaders to be decisive. To not have shot his friend in the face would have sent a message to the quail that America is weak."
Jon Stewart: "That's horrible."
Rob Corddry: "Look, the mere fact that we're even talking about how the vice president drives up with his rich friends in cars to shoot farm-raised wingless quail-tards is letting the quail know 'how' we're hunting them. I'm sure right now those birds are laughing at us in that little 'covey' of theirs.
Jon Stewart: "I'm not sure birds can laugh, Rob."
Rob Corddry: "Well, whatever it is they do ... coo .. they're cooing at us right now, Jon, because here we are talking openly about our plans to hunt them. Jig is up. Quails one, America zero.
Jon Stewart: "Okay, well, on a purely human level, is the vice president at least sorry?"
Rob Corddry: "Jon, what difference does it make? The bullets are already in this man's face. Let's move forward across party lines as a people ... to get him some sort of mask."
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That's pretty good.
But it's taken a turn to the worse. The lawyer had some of the pellets drift into his heart.
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????
Cripes what the hell kinda doctors does he have? I'd think that xrays/mri's would be a matter of course and the pellets shoulda been spotted and removed first thing. Who's medical staff is working on this guy? The governments or Whittingdons? Hell, I'd make damn sure any doctor working on me in this situation doesn't get his check counter-signed by the government.
I hope the guy recovers... and I''m sure Cheney feels like a total dick over the whole thing.
No pun intended.
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Hang, it's not so simple as they just go in and get them. To get a single pellet that is deep inside would need really invasive surgery. Is cutting the guy open more worth 1 tiny pellet?
That's not to mention that the pellets move. Everytime he moves, every time he breathes, every time his heart beats, the pellets can move. The pellet location from an Xray 5 minutes previous might be somewhere else.
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I'd rather go hunting with Dick Cheney, than go riding in the car with Ted Kennedy.
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Geez, if I had a choice, I'd do neither.
What laser said on the pellets. That is very unfortunate.
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Originally posted by lasersailor184
Is cutting the guy open more worth 1 tiny pellet?
They don't have to, just give him a boosted MRI :)
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Originally posted by Delirium
I'd rather go hunting with Dick Cheney, than go riding in the car with Ted Kennedy.
Well you are Cheneys type:)
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Originally posted by Delirium
I'd rather go hunting with Dick Cheney, than go riding in the car with Ted Kennedy.
Let's see
President - 1 DUI conviction
Vice - 2 DUI Convictions
Vice waits 20 some hours before telling and turns away local
authorities...hmmmm the next time some extreme right wing regressive
jackboot wants to discuss Chappaquiddick...
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Originally posted by Silat
....Vice waits 20 some hours before telling and turns away local
authorities...hmmmm the next time some extreme right wing regressive
jackboot wants to discuss Chappaquiddick...
Did Cheney leave the guy laying in a field bleeding? No
did he tell someone the guy shot himself? No
Did he tell everybody he was just along for the "ride"? No
I dont see how you can relate this on the same scale as a liberal blowhard from Massachusetts that gets away with murder and no DUI conviction?
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Originally posted by Airscrew
Did Cheney leave the guy laying in a field bleeding? No
did he tell someone the guy shot himself? No
Did he tell everybody he was just along for the "ride"? No
I dont see how you can relate this on the same scale as a liberal blowhard from Massachusetts that gets away with murder and no DUI conviction?
Murder is a huge stretch .............
And I advise you to actually read the Kennedy story. No one was left to die there either. It was a drowning.
How do you know that no drinking was involved in the Cheney the Triggerman shooting incident?
Probably for the same reasons you dont know if Kennedy was drunk.
Ill help you... It was the time delay..............
And its easy equating this with that....................
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Originally posted by Silat
Murder is a huge stretch .............
And I advise you to actually read the Kennedy story. No one was left to die there either. It was a drowning.
Silat, Kennedy left the scene of an accident. He knew there was a woman in the car when he surfaced. He made no attempt to get her out, and he left the scene of an accident. Murder? No...manslaughter? Most definately.
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I hope no one brings up Laura Bush speeding and blowing thru a stop sign to murder her 17 yr old boyfriend Michael Douglas back in 1963. The last thing this topic needs is any escalation!
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Originally posted by Westy
The last thing this topic needs is any escalation!
Why do you think I mentioned Ted Kennedy?
Frankly, I don't like most politicians... Democrat, Republican, liberal or conservative...
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More importantly:
Who is going to make the killing off of "I survived hunting with Dick Cheney" T-shirts?
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life is good when we can spend so must time on non news :)
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(http://www.buckfush.com/images/Cheney_Shoots_Whittington.jpg)
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Originally posted by Silat
Vice waits 20 some hours before telling and turns away local
authorities...hmmmm the next time some extreme right wing regressive
jackboot wants to discuss Chappaquiddick...
How about telling the truth? the "AUTHROITIES" which would be the local sherrif's office was notified within minutes, and was on the scene investigating within the hour.
On the other hand kennedy escaped the accident and left the drowned woman in the car, and didnt tell ANYONE until the next morning.
Fortunately for us the liberal media is only an authroity on filtering the news they care to tell us according to their own adjenda. I think the news story from the weekend that does have national intrest in fact does involve the vice-president. You know the one that wasnt covered where Vice-President Gore went to Saudi and spoke, proclaiming that the US is rounding up Arabs, taking them into custody, and detaining them under horrible conditions, siting a left wing orginizations report. This while there are already riots going on over political cartoons.
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Gore and Quayle
Heh... "Dum and Dummer"
:D
Mac
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Thanks Murdr.....I think you just killed this thread! :D
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Originally posted by Elfie
Thanks Murdr.....I think you just killed this thread! :D
:rofl
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Originally posted by Murdr
How about telling the truth? the "AUTHROITIES" which would be the local sherrif's office was notified within minutes, and was on the scene investigating within the hour.
On the other hand kennedy escaped the accident and left the drowned woman in the car, and didnt tell ANYONE until the next morning.
Fortunately for us the liberal media is only an authroity on filtering the news they care to tell us according to their own adjenda. I think the news story from the weekend that does have national intrest in fact does involve the vice-president. You know the one that wasnt covered where Vice-President Gore went to Saudi and spoke, proclaiming that the US is rounding up Arabs, taking them into custody, and detaining them under horrible conditions, siting a left wing orginizations report. This while there are already riots going on over political cartoons.
If there were a LIBERAL MEDIA then we wouldnt be in IRAQ...:)
If there were a liberal media then Scooter and Shooter would both be in hot water over Plame among other things.
There is no liberal media.
Was it a liberal media when we had Clintons sex capades on the front page for years? Or rightwing rumors of Hillary murdering people etc ?
Liberal Media is a rightwing talking point to get the base all excited. And it obviously works...
Kennedy told all when he got back to the house. The woman was dead at the scene. He left to get back to his handlers. Just like Cheney. Except Cheney didnt have to go anywhere.
And please tell me when the police interviewed the shooter??? I mean Dick Triggerman Cheney of course........Of course you cant because he hasnt talked to the police...
Please Murdr.. Pulling the Lib/Dem card that somehow they dont want to fight terrorists aka talking about torture is really below you...Lib/Dems want the laws of our great country followed. Even by the VP and the Pres. Apparently reps dont:)
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Originally posted by Elfie
Thanks Murdr.....I think you just killed this thread! :D
Hardly.............Just cause he says it doesnt make it true...
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No you're getting comical Silat.
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I was flipping past ABC news the other week and they were talking about their poll regarding the terrorist wire tapping. Within 30 seconds I was saying outloud "I cant believe these people! How stupid do they think we are?" Their poll numbers broke in favor of the president. So how do they close the story? "Nearly half of the people polled disapproved of the presidents program". Hello? The story wasnt that a majority were ok with the issue? Noooo, that wasnt the result they wanted. So instead put the focus on what they would have wanted.
Its pretty simple. Look at the red and blue by county election map. The major population centers lean liberal. The major media is based where? Same place. They think they are in touch with America because they are completely surrounded by like minded people. They think they are even handed reporting the news. Looking at the map though, they occupy islands of blue surrounded by a sea of red.
And please tell me when the police interviewed the shooter??? I mean Dick Triggerman Cheney of course........Of course you cant because he hasnt talked to the police...
It is my understanding that arrangments were made for an interview for the next morning. A pair of deputies were unaware of that appointment and tried to reach him that night anyways. He did meet with them at the arranged time. I guess we will ignore that he is surrounded by law enforcment round the clock.
Its not like he bared FBI from their investigation for 30 hours after the incident in question like Hilary did following Vince Fosters suicide, keeping them out of his offfice.
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Originally posted by Murdr
I was flipping past ABC news the other week and they were talking about their poll regarding the terrorist wire tapping. Within 30 seconds I was saying outloud "I cant believe these people! How stupid do they think we are?" Their poll numbers broke in favor of the president. So how do they close the story? "Nearly half of the people polled disapproved of the presidents program". Hello? The story wasnt that a majority were ok with the issue? Noooo, that wasnt the result they wanted. So instead put the focus on what they would have wanted.
Its pretty simple. Look at the red and blue by county election map. The major population centers lean liberal. The major media is based where? Same place. They think they are in touch with America because they are completely surrounded by like minded people. They think they are even handed reporting the news. Looking at the map though, they occupy islands of blue surrounded by a sea of red.
It is my understanding that arrangments were made for an interview for the next morning. A pair of deputies were unaware of that appointment and tried to reach him that night anyways. He did meet with them at the arranged time. I guess we will ignore that he is surrounded by law enforcment round the clock.
Its not like he bared FBI from their investigation for 30 hours after the incident in question like Hilary did following Vince Fosters suicide, keeping them out of his offfice.
There is no liberal media. Check who owns the media. Check how many righties to lefties are on the tv and the radio. Lookup the facts..
Try watching the Jim Lehrer hour for you news if you want unbiased news.. You see its not really a liberal news show. If you righties would actually watch it once you would see that...
Hillary didnt do what you said. Murdr you cant keep using rightwing talking points like they are facts.
Hillary did nothing to Vince Foster. Years of rightwing lawsuits and investigations that cost this country many dollars and wasted the Presidents time found ZILCH.
The only thing BILL did was lie about sex.
All other dispersions are false and were proved false by the rights own investigations.
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I didnt say she did anything to Foster, nor did I earlier say dems didnt want to fight terrorism. But I did mix up 2 different incidents that Ill be happy to correct. She did wait 30 hours to turn over Fosters suicide note. Her chief of staff removed files from his office after his death when the office was supposed to be sealed until investigated.
Just last night Keith Oberman stated Bush had accidently shot a deer during a dove hunt. In the next segment he did correct his statment that it was actually a 'killdeer' bird. Then he went on to interview a trauma doctor repeatedly stating a reported 90 yard distance of the Cheney shooting, making something of the doctor saying that range was not consistant with the injuries. The dr said the injuries were consistant with a range of 15-30 yards. 30 yards is the official reported range by the way, which equals 90 feet, not yards. No doubt an honest mistake, but one that was left uncorrected, and you would think if you were having a authoritative guest you could get your facts straight. So not only slanted but incompentent too.
Then also last night on the Situation Room, in a report they snipped a sentence from the Rush show and completely represented as something it was not Link (http://www.rushlimbaugh.com/home/daily/site_021506/content/stop_the_tape.guest.html)
Many times it just a turn of a phrase, but then other times it blatent. You know, like how they refuse to even talk about the swift boat book in a network news cast, but rush to feature forged documents.
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Did keith olberman get the Bullets - Maverics score right?
maybe ken burns can correct him on the other stuff....lololol....
in other news, its no surprise the pwnee indians didnt end up doing so well
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"Guns don't kill people,vice presidents do" :D
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Originally posted by Silat
There is no liberal media.
What is 'Air America' vs the radio shows by O'Reilly and Sean Hannity? Or the 'New York Times' vs the 'Wall Street Journal'?
Sorry Silat, there is bias on BOTH sides, to deny it laughable.
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Originally posted by Murdr
I didnt say she did anything to Foster, nor did I earlier say dems didnt want to fight terrorism. But I did mix up 2 different incidents that Ill be happy to correct. She did wait 30 hours to turn over Fosters suicide note. Her chief of staff removed files from his office after his death when the office was supposed to be sealed until investigated.
Just last night Keith Oberman stated Bush had accidently shot a deer during a dove hunt. In the next segment he did correct his statment that it was actually a 'killdeer' bird. Then he went on to interview a trauma doctor repeatedly stating a reported 90 yard distance of the Cheney shooting, making something of the doctor saying that range was not consistant with the injuries. The dr said the injuries were consistant with a range of 15-30 yards. 30 yards is the official reported range by the way, which equals 90 feet, not yards. No doubt an honest mistake, but one that was left uncorrected, and you would think if you were having a authoritative guest you could get your facts straight. So not only slanted but incompentent too.
Then also last night on the Situation Room, in a report they snipped a sentence from the Rush show and completely represented as something it was not Link (http://www.rushlimbaugh.com/home/daily/site_021506/content/stop_the_tape.guest.html)
Many times it just a turn of a phrase, but then other times it blatent. You know, like how they refuse to even talk about the swift boat book in a network news cast, but rush to feature forged documents.
Murdr the swifties have been completely discredited.. U did know that ? It was a lie.. SO were the men telling the stories...
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Murdr the swifties have been completely discredited.. U did know that ? It was a lie.. SO were the men telling the stories...
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since when? post something credible please.
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Originally posted by Yeager
Murdr the swifties have been completely discredited.. U did know that ? It was a lie.. SO were the men telling the stories...
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since when? post something credible please.
First I would have to say Im disappointed in anyone that believed the talking points about Kerry or McCain tht the reps and Bush boys propogated in order to use lies to gain the presidency without actually taking the time to use GOOGLE to verify it for themselves.
I shouldnt have to do it for you.
Here are a few links. You can search the truth out very easily by using the internet.
http://homepage.mac.com/chinesemac/kerry_medals/truth.html
http://swiftvets.eriposte.com/
http://www.factcheck.org/article231.html
http://www.opinionjournal.com/editorial/feature.html?id=110005460
http://www.publicchristian.com/index.php?p=115
http://www.washingtonpost.com/wp-dyn/articles/A21239-2004Aug21.html
http://mediamatters.org/items/200408050007
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Originally posted by Delirium
What is 'Air America' vs the radio shows by O'Reilly and Sean Hannity? Or the 'New York Times' vs the 'Wall Street Journal'?
Sorry Silat, there is bias on BOTH sides, to deny it laughable.
I didnt deny it..
I said there isnt a liberal media conspiracy which is what you righties keep saying...
Prove there is.....................
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Vice President Dick Cheney, while hunting wild geese in the Rose Garden, accidentally shot President Bush twice, once in the heart and once in the head. "I didn't really shoot the President twice," said Cheney. "The second time I shot him, I was president. It wasn't until my third shot, where I accidentally shot my own foot, that I had shot the president twice.
I was officially injured and unable to govern, when Dennis Hastert came in, and stepped on the butt handle of the rifle causing it to swing up like a rake and shoot his hair off. I guess I'm officially responsible for that too, meaning I shot the acting president for a total of three occupants of the oval office. I'm not proud, but it is a record."
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Originally posted by Silat
I didnt deny it..
I said there isnt a liberal media conspiracy which is what you righties keep saying...
Prove there is.....................
Eh?
Originally posted by Silat
There is no liberal media.
I made no comment on the validity of the swifties. I merely stated that the big 3 chose to ignore that story. An unbiased media would have investigated both and reported the results on both. Instead, they ran with the one aginst the conservative, which was fabricated, and ignored that the other story even existed, until it had gained a life of its own dispite their lack of attention.
I did not say there was a conspiracy within the media, and I didnt see that elsewhere in this thread either. I did say that on a daily basis they allow the influence of their local culture to color their reporting, and choice of what to report. A culture which is more liberal than most places in the US outside thier population centers.
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Originally posted by Delirium
What is 'Air America' vs the radio shows by O'Reilly and Sean Hannity?
One pays broadcasters to carry them. The others earn good revenue through advertisement sales, due to good ratings.
Or the 'New York Times' vs the 'Wall Street Journal'?
One is laying off employees, one isnt.
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Originally posted by Silat
I didnt deny it..
I said there isnt a liberal media conspiracy which is what you righties keep saying...
Prove there is.....................
You said there isn't any liberal media... there is a conspiracy on both sides to 'out scream' the other side's viewpoints. It is far easier to yell louder or use more inflammatory messages than to try and discuss it and see both points of view.
I'm not a 'righty', I like to consider myself a moderate... the two party system would be ok if the moderates were more vocal, but they aren't. Instead, we have a two party system constantly battling each other rather than making a real difference in this country.
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Originally posted by Delirium
You said there isn't any liberal media... there is a conspiracy on both sides to 'out scream' the other side's viewpoints. It is far easier to yell louder or use more inflammatory messages than to try and discuss it and see both points of view.
I'm not a 'righty', I like to consider myself a moderate... the two party system would be ok if the moderates were more vocal, but they aren't. Instead, we have a two party system constantly battling each other rather than making a real difference in this country.
There is no Liberal Media. There is no RIGHTWING MEDIA.. YOu dont hear lefties pulling that card as much as Righties. Understand?
And who are you kidding? You are as right as they get my friend:)