Aces High Bulletin Board

General Forums => The O' Club => Topic started by: Ripsnort on October 17, 2000, 01:24:00 PM

Title: "Trick" or "Treat" ?
Post by: Ripsnort on October 17, 2000, 01:24:00 PM

TOP TEN REASONS WHY TRICK OR TREATING IS BETTER THAN SEX

10) You are guaranteed to get at least a little something in the sack.

9) If you get tired, you can wait 10 minutes and go at it again.

8) The uglier you look, the easier it is to get some.

7) You don't have to compliment the person who gives you some.

6) It's O.K. when the person you're with fantasizes you're someone else,

because you are.

5) Forty years from now you'll still enjoy candy.

4) If you don't like what you get, you can always go next door.

3) It doesn't matter if the kids hear you moaning and groaning.

2) Less guilt the morning after.

1) YOU CAN DO THE WHOLE NEIGHBORHOOD.

Title: "Trick" or "Treat" ?
Post by: Rooster on October 17, 2000, 06:19:00 PM

And now for something a little different

I am a BAD American.

I like big guns, and naturally big breasts.

I believe the money I make belongs to me and my family, not some mid-level governmental functionary with a bad comb-over who wants to give it away to crack addicts squeezing out babies.

I don't care about appearing compassionate.

I think playing with guns doesn't make you a killer.

I believe it's called the Boy Scouts for a reason.

I think I'm better off than the homeless.

I don't think being a minority makes you noble or victimized.

I don't care if you call me a racist, a homophobe or a misogynist.

I am not tolerant of others just because they are different.

I don't celebrate Swansea.

I believe that if you are selling me a Big  Mac, you do it in English.

I want to know when MTV became such crap.

I know what the definition of lying is.

I think Oprah's eyes are way too far apart.

I think that being a student doesn't give you any more enlightenment than working at Blockbuster.

I believe everyone has a right to pray to his or her God or gods, and they
can do it in their schools.

My heroes are John Wayne, Norman Schwartzkopf, and whoever canceled Dr.
Quinn the Medicine Woman.

I think creative violence and useless nudity and sex makes Iraqis deader and movies more interesting.

I don't hate the rich.

I don't pity the poor.

I know wrestling is fake, but I still think The Rock could kick my butt.

I've never owned nor have I ever been a slave. I didn't wander forty years
in the desert after getting chased out of Egypt.I haven't burned any witches or been persecuted by the Turks and neither have you, so shut-up already.

I believe a self-righteous liberal with a cause, is more dangerous than a Play Station.

I want to know exactly which church is it, where the Rev. Jesse Jackson preaches.

I don't care where Ellen DeGeneres puts her tongue.

I think explosions are cool.

I think the cops have every right to shoot your sorry bellybutton if you're running from them.

I believe if you are in the presence of a cop and you brandish any kind of
weapon, you're stupid and dead meat.

I like the convenience of buying oranges while I'm waiting at a stoplight,
and I'm pretty sure the Latina midget selling them to me is glad she no
longer lives in a refrigerator packing carton outside Ensenada.

I want somebody to explain to me exactly why it's wrong to point out
that when I watch a freeway chase, I know the loser(s) the police will
eventually pull out of the car, are gonna be gang-banging homies or vatos.

I believe that it doesn't take a village to raise a child, it takes parents.

I believe you don't have to speak with a lisp to pick out a couch for your livingroom.

I will not conform or compromise just to keep from hurting somebody's feelings

YES, I'm a BAD American.........

Title: "Trick" or "Treat" ?
Post by: StSanta on October 17, 2000, 10:58:00 PM

Ruining a perfectly light headed thread.

Heheh.

Title: "Trick" or "Treat" ?
Post by: Maverick on October 18, 2000, 01:55:00 PM

 

Quote

Originally posted by StSanta:
Ruining a perfectly light headed thread.

Heheh.

I think you're perfectly light headed enough for anyone Santa!    (http://bbs.hitechcreations.com/smf/Smileys/default/biggrin.gif)

(not bein serious here) <---disclaimer for those who can't tell a joke unless it hits them with a cream pie.  (http://bbs.hitechcreations.com/smf/Smileys/default/tongue.gif)


Mav

Title: "Trick" or "Treat" ?
Post by: Ripsnort on October 18, 2000, 02:17:00 PM

Rooster, wish you lived closer, we'd get along just fine over beer and pizza!
<S>

Title: "Trick" or "Treat" ?
Post by: Karnak on October 18, 2000, 02:35:00 PM

 (http://bbs.hitechcreations.com/smf/Smileys/default/tongue.gif)

Title: "Trick" or "Treat" ?
Post by: StSanta on October 18, 2000, 03:05:00 PM

LOL Mav.

It's easy when yer an air head  (http://bbs.hitechcreations.com/smf/Smileys/default/biggrin.gif)

------------------
StSanta
9./JG 54 "Grünherz"
(http://www.angelfire.com/nt/regoch/sig.gif)