Aces High Bulletin Board
General Forums => The O' Club => Topic started by: Ripsnort on May 24, 2006, 09:22:33 AM
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After months of cold and rainy weather, we are finally coming up to summer and BBQ season.
Therefore it is important to refresh your memory on the etiquette of this sublime outdoor cooking activity, as it's the only type of cooking a 'real' man will do, probably because there is an element of danger involved.
When a man volunteers to do the BBQ the following chain of events are put into motion:
Routine...
(1) The woman buys the food.
(2) The woman makes the salad, prepares the vegetables, and makes dessert.
(3) The woman prepares the meat for cooking, places it on a tray along with the necessary cooking utensils and sauces, and takes it to the man who is lounging beside the grill - beer in hand.
Here comes the important part:
(4) THE MAN PLACES THE MEAT ON THE GRILL.
More routine....
(5) The woman goes inside to organize the plates and cutlery.
(6) The woman comes out to tell the man that the meat is burning. He thanks her and asks if she will bring another beer while he deals with the situation.
Important again:
(7) THE MAN TAKES THE MEAT OFF THE GRILL AND HANDS IT TO THE WOMAN.
More routine....
(8) The woman prepares the plates, salad, bread, utensils, napkins, sauces, and brings them to the table.
(9) After eating, the woman clears the table and does the dishes.
And most important of all:
(10) Everyone PRAISES the MAN and THANKS HIM for his cooking efforts.
(11) The man asks the woman how she enjoyed "her night off." And, upon seeing her annoyed reaction, concludes that there's just no pleasing some women....:huh
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Women. You can`t live without them and you can`t shoot them.
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then whats the maid for?
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Originally posted by Nilsen
then whats the maid for?
Do we REALLY have to explain that to you Nilsen? :huh
(http://www.bimmerfest.com/forums/images/smilies/hump.gif)
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aaaaaaaaaaa...... NOW i get it :eek:
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You guys rehearsed this bit didnt you? :)
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Nothing wrong with that. The only part I do different is the asking for a beer part. I just blow across the top of the near empty bottle. Which in turn makes that cool noise. All women were born to recognise this sound as a male distress call for more beer. :rofl
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Ya...my wife and me were happy for 20 years...then we met.
R. Dangerfield
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Originally posted by PuckIt
Nothing wrong with that. The only part I do different is the asking for a beer part. I just blow across the top of the near empty bottle. Which in turn makes that cool noise. All women were born to recognise this sound as a male distress call for more beer. :rofl
:rofl :rofl :rofl :rofl
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Originally posted by PuckIt
Nothing wrong with that. The only part I do different is the asking for a beer part. I just blow across the top of the near empty bottle. Which in turn makes that cool noise. All women were born to recognise this sound as a male distress call for more beer. :rofl
Got to try that call,,,lol.
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Be aware that some females will be reluctant. They will try to fight their natural urge to retrieve. Most will ask what you are doing, or ask you to stop. Dont fall for it. Keep it up. Most will get up and go to the kitchen. At this point your allmost there. Keep making the noise. You can then begin to tease them with the smile, and bottle shake followed by the blow. It wont take long, and she will retrieve. Now to finish off her training she may require a treat for a job well done. The required treat for her is the empty bottle. She will naturally take it and throw it away.:aok
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Originally posted by PuckIt
Nothing wrong with that. The only part I do different is the asking for a beer part. I just blow across the top of the near empty bottle. Which in turn makes that cool noise. All women were born to recognise this sound as a male distress call for more beer. :aok :aok
And then, when she (wife or g/f) doesn't hear the first tone, you tip the bottle oh-so-slightly and increase air velocity and .........................wha-la. You grab an octave and that becomes even more annoying which speeds the delivery of the ever elusive COLD ONE!!!
did i ever tell you guys how much i like to BBQ! Oh, btw, at the part where "and takes it to the man who is lounging beside the grill - beer in hand." you for got the part of watching all the girls in the pool/lake.
:cool: :D
hey, we got to ease into this cooking stuff.
28
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You got it JB! :lol